001: Long Drive To Long Beach, Part One

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Team Davey proudly presents...
001: Long Drive To Long Beach, Part One: A Bump in the Road

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Sunday, January 31st, 2021 (Morning)

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February 8th marks the season premiere of Monday Night Brawl, our protagonist's new home within the EWC. Though he hasn't been booked to compete yet, Davey doesn't want to miss out on seeing first-hand just what he's gotten himself into. It's a long drive from Columbia, South Carolina to Long Beach, California, but what better way to say goodbye to the Dunham RV than by taking it on one last road trip?

Everybody's heard of the EWC, even Davey, but for the past ten years he's avoided anything having to do with wrestling. Though he'd never outright admit it, it always pained him to be reminded of what he was missing out on. He'd made the right choice choosing Haley and Elizabeth. No argument there. Family first, always. But he didn't need to be reminded that he harbored just a teensy-tiny bit of regret. No point picking at an old scar, he'd say to himself every time wrestling came on television, then change the channel. "Oh, good, I'll just watch baseball instead." Go Red Sox!

Nowadays, however, Davey no longer has to avoid the sport he loves the most. If only he could've avoided the pothole he just hit...

"What the (expletive)?!"

They say a major percentage of accidents happen within two miles of home. This accident takes place two feet from the Dunham family driveway.

"Crap! I forgot that was there."

"Did you just hit the pothole I told you to watch out for, but you kept telling me not to worry about?" Haley asks ever-so-sweetly from the passenger side of the RV. She'd only barely gotten her seatbelt fastened.

"Maybe we're in luck. It might've just been the neighbor's poodle."

"Dave! That's an awful thing to say!"

"Darn thing never shuts up, Haley. And if it was him, maybe now would've been a good time to bark, eh? But noooo, he only does that at 2AM."

"What happened?" Elizabeth enters the cab, rubbing her eyes. "I don't appreciate being woken up. I was having a wonderful dream that I was about to marry Ryan Reynolds."

"Daddy hit the pothole we kept warning him about."

"You sure? Maybe it was that perv., Adrian. I swear I caught him checking me out through his bedroom window when I was coming out of the shower this morning."

Davey's eyes go wide in anger, but before he can speak Haley puts her hand over his mouth and looks over her shoulder at Elizabeth.

"Wait, you were already asleep? How is that even possible? We literally just got in."

"I was up all night because that damn poodle wouldn't shut the (expletive) up."

"Language!"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry. It's just that Ryan's so pretty and now I'm sad."

"That's no excuse to talk like one of your father's construction workers. Anyway, Gosling's the prettier Ryan."

"Eww! He looks like an out-of-work member of some boy band nobody's ever heard of."

"Cuhnnyespeeknow?" Davey asks, Haley's hand still covering his mouth.

"Oops, sorry."

"Whilst you ladies continue the great debate of the century, I'm gonna get out and check the rear."

"You do that. But just so you know, you probably wouldn't have hit that pothole if you'd backed in to the driveway instead of having to back out."

"Hindsight's twenty-twenty, my love."

"Can we never speak of 2020, like, ever again?"

"That's not what your father was--"

"I know, but still," Elizabeth interrupts, visibly shaking off the thought of what may forever be known as the worst year ever like it had 8 legs and just as many eyes.

"I'm sure we'll be off and running in no time, girls. If I'm not back in twenty minutes, send pizza," Davey jokes as he hops out and shuts the door behind him.

"There's that awful number again. I'm going back to sleep."

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Sunday, January 31st, 2021 (Afternoon)

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"Good as new! And it only took," Davey looks down at his wrist, realizes watches aren't really a thing anymore--thus he doesn't have one--and pulls out his cell phone instead. "SIX HOURS?!"

"It's okay, we have a week to get there," Haley says as she puts a hand on her hubby's shoulder. The two of them are standing behind the RV checking out Davey's handiwork. As luck would have it, it was just the mailbox he'd hit.

"I can't believe it took SIX HOURS to fix a freakin' mailbox!"

"Can we leave now? Like, RIGHT NOW? I just saw Adrian come out of his house carrying a toolbox," Elizabeth exclaims from the side door, beckoning them to get back in the RV.

"Ah, how I miss the days of being young and in love. Now I'm not even youn--" Haley glares at Davey. "Not even the least bit bitter to be a married man. I love you, cupcake."

"Mmhmm."

Adrian approaches.

"Hey, Mr. Dunham. Mrs. Dunham. Thought maybe you could use a hand there."

"Funny you're just now coming out to help, Adam. I've already fixed it."

"It's Adrian. And I'm sorry about that. My mom broke her ankle tripping over Shotzy. That's our dog."

"Oh, we already know about Shotzy," Davey shoots a look at Haley.

"Yeah, she's been having trouble gettin' around, so I had to spend the day doing chores," Adrian says with feigned enthusiasm.

"That's awfully nice of you, Anthony."

"I think he said his name was Antonio."

"Adrian. Anyway, are you guys heading somewhere? Is your daughter around? I mean, I assume she's your daughter. Looks too young to be your sister, amiright?" Adrian throws a fake punch at Davey like they're old chums. Davey has to fight the urge to throw a real one.

"Yeah, Austin, that's our daughter. But she's inside, sound asleep. We were just leaving."

"Sir, I'm starting to suspect you're intentionally messing up my name."

"You catch on fast, Alfonso. Why couldn't you be that fast getting out here to help me fix my mailbox?"

"Dave..." Haley cautions.

"Look, I said I was sorry. It's not like I even had to offer."

"What's the point offering to help after the job's already been done? And I know about your wandering eye, boy. You've been spying on my daughter, and just let me tell you that if I ever--"

"Okay, well, thanks for offering to help, Alvin. We're gonna get going now, so if you don't mind..." Haley grabs Davey by the hand and starts pulling him toward the front of the RV.

"It's Adrian! Like that Sylvester Stallone movie!"

Davey and Haley get back inside the RV and start to pull away as the neighbor boy jogs in pursuit, shouting 'Adrian' in a rather convincing imitation of Stallone.

"Something's not right with that boy," Davey tells Haley as he watches the sideview mirror. Elizabeth peeks her head into the cab.

"I know, right? Who the heck watches Sylvester Stallone movies?"

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To Be Continued

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