Rampage #517 - DESTRUCTION IN DIMITRIS II

[FN'R]

WARNING: This live event contains strong coarse language (L), and intense violence (V) which may be unsuitable for younger viewers. None of the matches you are about to watch have been predetermined. Only some of the thematic story-lines have been discussed beforehand. Accordingly, EWC and it's producers must insist that no one attempt to recreate or re-enact any match or activity performed in this live event...

»»DESTRUCTION IN DIMITRIS II««
A NIGHT OF MYSTERY AND WONDER!

The Extreme Wrestling Corporation Presents

FRIDAY NIGHT RAMPAGE

FRIDAYS LIVE ON ESPN & HBO AT 10PM CST.
SPONSORED IN PART BY UNDER ARMOUR, SONY, DR. PEPPER AND GEARBOX STUDIOS.

EPISODE #517
AUGUST 11TH 2023

Dimitris Tofalos Arena in Proastio, Patras, Greece

EWC RAMPAGE
8/11/2023
Dimitris Tofalos Arena in Proastio, Patras, Greece
General Manager - Grizzly Duggan
Commentators -
Play-By-Play: Koala Duggan
Color: Polar Duggan
Announcer: Emmanuelle Chriqui
Head Ref: Toyo Yasahiro
Assistant Refs: Mike Michaelson & Pierce Patterson
Backstage Help: Bryan Spade & Candice Duggan

---------------

Fog spreads throughout the arena, covering the screaming fans as "Asking For It" begins to sound off over the loudspeakers.



"MAYBE YOU TALKED TOO MUCH AND YOU WERE ASKING FOR IT, ASKING FOR IT, ASKING!
YOU CAN BLAME BAD LUCK, BUT YOU WERE ASKING FOR IT, ASKING FOR IT, ASKING!!!"

The fans scream for delight as the X-Tron explodes to life. Pyro ignites on the stage.



The camera pans around the arena as fans scream for delight and begin their chants and raise their signs high into the air. 

{MOMMY, SORRY, MOMMY, SORRY, MOMMY, SORRY... GO KISIKIL！}

{YOU GOT MOXIE KID, YOU GOT MOXIE!}

{THE MERC WITH THE MOUTH OF THE SOUTH}

{RAISE SOME HAVOC}

{HOUSE, HOUSE HUNTERS!}

{COMMON CORE TELLS US, THE AVENGERS ALWAYS WIN!}







FNR！

FNR！

FNR！

FNR！

The camera flashes back to the Extreme-Tron which shows the current FN'R roster. Ace King, Andrea Hernandez, Autumn Raven, Cassie Wolfe, Cosmo Goldworthy, Declan O'Connor, Chris Page, Vin Havoc, Jamie Love, Jason Anderson, Kendrick Kross, Kisikil, Lavender, Luke Saito, Mercenary, Moxie, Phoenix Winterborn, Ruthann Anderson, Samantha Hamilton, Emiko Okita and Vespertine. We cut back to Andrea Hernandez who holds her HBO Broadcast Championship high, then The Mercenary and Vin Havoc both hold up the United States Championship. Then the picture bleeds into Lavender wearing the EWC Undisputed Championship. She yells in pride as feed cuts back into a look at the roster. There's another round of pyro.




And then the camera cuts over to the commentary desk, where Koala Duggan stands with a smile. Polar Duggan stands, bows to the camera and then sits back down. Koala sits down, takes a drink from his water bottle and starts.

KD: Hello ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to a special Rampage. What's so special about it you ask? It is a mystery card! 

P-DUG: Grizzly Duggan loves these stupid gimmicks, but this one is actually pretty intriguing.   

KD: Starting with one of two matches we do know, in our Main Event it will be the team of Moxie and Kisikil taking on our EWC United States Champions The Mercenary and Vin Havoc.

P-DUG: This will be a crazy tag team match, and it's a hard one to call right now. I know I'd love to see Merc and Vin as a tag team in the future, they had great chemistry and seeing them beat the shit out of random people was a big pop brother. 

KD: Indeed, I also think Moxie and Kisikil may have a future together.   

P-DUG: And in our other confirmed match, The Core Avengers take on The House Hunters. Personally, I hope Core squashes House Hunters. Don't need this comedy nonsense in my wrestling.  

KD: Yea, we saw someone die live on television a few weeks ago, but comedy is killing the biz.   

P-DUG: Hey, when you're dead, you cannot sell anymore than that. Darna Dare lived this business to her very last, a true patriot. House Hunters cannot even spell that word. 

KD: Okay Boomer. All this and more, with an insane mystery card, when Rampage returns after the break!  

---

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---

We return to ringside where Mike Michaelson climbs into the ring.

KD: Looks like our opening bout is starting, wonder who it will be.

P-Dug: No idea, this is mildly entertaining though.

Chriqui: The following match is falls count anywhere match!

KD: Oh, that's a good stip. Wonder who it'll be.

Chriqui: Introducing first, from Greenock, South Australia and now residing in Reno, Nevada, “The Rebel Princess” ... CASSIE WOLFE!!!

The opening riff of “Wolf Within” hits the speakers and once the lyrics kick in Cassie Wolfe emerges from the back excited to start the match, with her hands on her leather jacket’s sides the rookie wrestler turns her back to the crowd.

When her name is announced Cassie spins around flashing the metal horns sign with her left hand and clapping fans hands with the other, when she reaches the ring Cassie jumps onto the apron before giving her hair a full flip and removing her jacket to give to a stagehand, she then jumps over the top rope and into the ring, rolling to her knees and basking in the moment.

P-Dug: One of Rampage's newest and brightest here in the opening bout.

Chriqui: And her opponent from Takayama, Japan & weighing in at 120 pounds... JAMIE LOVE!!!

The arena plunges into darkness as a haunting piano melody can be heard over the sound system. As the beat starts at 11 seconds a spotlight shines on Sara Rische playing an expensive Grand Piano to the left of the stage. She plays for 10 seconds when a second spotlight shines on Jamie Love as he enters the arena to a chorus of boos as his body guard John Bishop stands behind him. He walks down the aisle with JB following closely behind him, glancing out at the live audience, smirking at the with disdain in the shadows of the House hoodie he has on. As he climbs into the ring Sara makes her way down to ringside. He hands Sara his hoodie and stretches in the corner as (he waits for his opponent/his opponent stares at him with an irritated look in their eyes.

KD: And our second entrant, Jamie Love! This could be a good warm-up match ahead of his hardcore match with Lil Petey.

Cassie Wolfe Vs Jamie Love - Falls Count Anywhere

DING DING DING

With the sound of the bell, both our competitors have the same idea in mind as they rush into each other and attempt a dropkick. They both jump up to their feet, Jamie Love throws a forearm into Cassie's torso, Jamie grabs Cassie by the wrist and sends her into the ropes with an Irish-Whip, on the rebound Jamie spins around and sends Cassie inside out with a spinning elbow. Cassie rolls out of the ring, grabbing her jaw and trying to rub feeling back into it. Jamie Love grabs the top rope and leaps down into a planchas, Cassie rolls back into the ring causing Jamie to land hard on the padded concrete. Cassie grabs the top rope and vaults over it, spinning midair landing with a moonsault on Jamie Love!

KD: That moonsault was a thing of beauty from Cassie Wolfe, and this one is falls count anywhere so she could try a pinfall right now if she wanted. 

P-Dug: And I think I would, get under Jamie's skin and let him know she could win this match in minutes. 

Cassie does not opt for the aforementioned pinfall, instead she drags Jamie up by his head and then sends him into the steel steps with an Irish-whip variant. Jamie hits the steps and does a front-flip over them upon impact. Jamie crawls forward and pulls himself up with the help of the barricade. Cassie Wolfe slides back into the ring and comes flying out of the opposite side with a suicide dive right into Jamie Love's spine! Cassie Wolfe drags Jamie up by his head and this time she leaps up, wrapping her legs around Jamie's head while bringing him down into a poisonrana! Jamie grabs the ring-apron and pulls himself up to his feet, Cassie jumps in for a superkick but Jamie grabs her leg and drops down keeping her leg straight against his shoulder to deadlock her knee! Jamie transitions from that into an ankle lock with his arms! Cassie yells out in pain, she might be about to tap! Jamie squeezes the hold even tighter, Cassie throws her hands about, looking for anything to help, she reaches under the ring apron and pulls out a fire extinguisher to spray a cloud of foam into the back of Jamie's head! Jamie drops the hold while choking and coughing, Cassie grabs her ankle in pain. 

P-Dug: That fire extinguisher, it's always so helpful right when you need it to be. Jamie Love might have just been taken out of this one!

KD: That foam, it gets into your lungs and blocks your airways. Nasty stuff. 

Cassie pulls herself up the ring apron, and then she leaps into a superkick into the small of Jamie Love's back, but when she puts all her weight on her bad leg she falls flat... Still the impact of her kick sends Jamie forward, toppling over face-first into the second set of steel steps. Jamie Love pulls himself up the steps, his face now a crimson mask of blood and foam. He stumbles a bit but maintains his footing thanks to the barricade. Cassie Wolfe pulls herself up and limps over to Jamie. Jamie throws a heavy forearm into Cassie's face, sending her backwards into the apron. Jamie Love comes up from behind to grab on a headlock and pull Cassie down into a DDT on the fire extinguisher. Jamie drags Cassie up by her head, gives her a slap and sends her into the ring. Jamie slaps himself a few times to regain his sense of self, then he steps up onto the apron, then he vaults over to top rope onto the middle rope and then he springs off into an elbow drop, but Cassie moves! Jamie pops up to his knees grabbing his elbow, Cassie from behind with The Greenest Wizard! The impact off her knee sends Jamie off off his feet into the ropes, rebounding him backwards into Cassie who pulls her up and down with a double underhook into a DDT, WOLFE HUNT!!! Cover!

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THREE!!!

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via pinfall ... CASSIE WOLFE!!!!!

Cassie Wolfe throws up her hands in celebration of her first win on Rampage Television. Jamie Love rolls out of the ring and limps to the back on his own accord. Cassie bows to the crowd, and poses with a fan, before heading to the back.

KD: Big win from Cassie Wolfe there, getting her first on Friday Night Rampage Television. Possibly the first of many.

P-Dug: Jamie Love had an answer for a lot of what Cassie brought, but in the end she just wanted this win more plain and simple. 

We stay ringside where the crowd is running hot after the opening contest, brand pride on full display as the Rampage faithful pick up where they left off at Parabellum.

"THIS IS RAMPAGE!" clapclap-clapclapclap "THIS IS RAMPAGE!"

KD: Do you know what, I think they're right? This IS Rampage and we're just getting started, folks. The pool has begun to shrink, and we're about to choose two more mystery competitors for our next match.

P-Dug: Wow, spoilers. It could be three, four, or six competitors, you don't know! It's a mystery!

Chriqui: The following match is for one fall, and is a TLC match! With a prize of $500,000 to the victor!

P-Dug: Well, fuck me. Gideon Gage could really use that, couldn't he? C'mon, big G!

Chriqui: Introducing first, from Chicago, Illinois, and weighing in at two hundred and twenty three pounds... PHOENIX WINTERBORN!!!

Red spotlights hit the stage, as Phoenix's video comes up on the tron.

As his name appears on the screen, out walks Chi-Town's Finest, to a huge pop from the crowd. He starts down the ramp, picking up the pace as he puts his hands out to high-five the fans, getting another pop as he slides into the ring.

KD: It's the Gatekeeper! We haven't seen him since Scars and Stripes, where he treated us to one hell of an opening match against Autumn Raven. You can tell the crowd have missed him.

P-Dug: So has the canvas, without the familiar feeling of his shoulders being pinned to it...

Chriqui: And his opponent, from Los Angeles, and weighing in at two hundred and fifteen pounds... KENDRICK KROSS!!!

As The Devil in I plays smoke slowly starts to raise as Kendrick walks out from the back with a barbed wire bat in his right hand. He walks down the ramp with a smirk on his face before dropping the bat by the ring and sliding in ready for the match.

KD: Former X-Division champion, and two-time TV Champion, Kendrick Kross. He looks ready.

P-Dug: Yeah, ready for a payday. Phoenix Winterdipshit is basically a free win. Gideon Gage has to be beside himself!

Phoenix Winterborn Vs Kendrick Kross - T-L-C For 500K

DING DING DING

If the Gatekeeper is a free win, nobody's told him about it. A smirking Kendrick Kross is taking his sweet time limbering up, looking out at the crowd with complete disregard for his opponent, when Phoenix crosses the ring in an instant and launches his opponent backwards with a shotgun dropkick! Kross' skull slams off the turnbuckle, and he stumbles forward right into a beautiful floatover suplex! Winterborn has fire in his eyes as he falls directly into a mounted press, keeping a stunned Kross down. The crowd are on their feet and chanting, despite the lack of an official to make the count.

"ONE!"



"TWO!"



"AWWWWWWWWW!"

It is - or would be - agonizingly close, as a furious Kendrick Kross comes to life and hurls Winterborn from on top of him, trying to roll right to his feet but stumbling. Winterborn, smiling, seizes a leg, and improvises with a quick Dragon Screw, slinging Kross into the ropes. Phoenix springs up, winding his arm to further encourage the crowd as he takes off toward the opposite side of the ring, full-leaning into the ropes and entering a sprint... only to watch as Kross pulls himself off the apron to the outside. Winterborn puts on the brakes, and then receives another roar of appreciation as he digs deep again, for a Tope Con Hilo!

He sails up, over, and down, onto a wide-eyed Kendrick Kross-- who turns at the last instant, RIPS Winterborn from the air and delivers a gloriously ugly snap powerslam RIGHT THROUGH THE NEAREST TABLE!

KD: Ouch! Kendrick Kross playing the spoiler on that one! Winterborn was having fun out there, rooting through the old playbook, but these kind of matches can turn on a dime. Wait, are they chanting, 'we want tables'? We just had tables!

P-Dug: They want more tables! And maybe a ladder! And some chairs!

Kross is smart-mouthing a kid in the front of the crowd, who has the audacity to be wearing a Phoenix Winterborn t-shirt. He's preoccupied enough with this exchange that the downed man is able to pull himself onto one knee, panting off the devastating collision with the table and the floor, and managing to be halfway to his feet by the time Kross flips off the arguing child and darts back t oward his opponent. WHAM! Phoenix thinks fast, staggering right into a backhand blow, then locking up to impale Kendrick Kross into the wreckage of the table with a headlock driver! LIGHT OF THE APOCALYPSE!

It takes a lot out of the Gatekeeper, who's still seeing stars, but as he goes sprawling onto the barricade to recover, he's encouraged by the young fan, whose father is even more obliging - folding up his chair and passing it to Phoenix, along with a hearty slap on the back. Winterborn grins, and turns toward Kross, who is crawling away, turning as he hears the footfalls behind him - and tries to kick the chair out of Phoenix's grasp, only for it to smash down hard on his knee! He rolls in agony, but manages to get an arm up to fend off the second shot, then stagger-sprawls into a messy double leg that brings both men crashing against a standing ladder! It teeters, and falls, catching on the top rope with a few precarious bounces.

Both men make it to their feet and grab opposite sides of the ladder, wrestling it back and forth, before Kross LETS Phoenix push it towards him, then pops up onto the unbalanced metal, using it to hit a brain-numbing step-up enziguri! Winterborn falls backwards, and Kross lands hard on the ladder, barely clinging on and shakily balancing upright. He glances down at his opponent, spits a few disdainful words, and then walks up toward the ring, hopping from the ladder onto the top rope...

And flying through the air to hit a stunning moonsault! THREE STEP FLIP!

P-Dug: See, that's talent, right there. Winterborn's too old and tired to keep up with this.

KD: I have to agree, little bro, it's not looking good for Phoenix Winterborn. Kross is a piece of work, but the crowd are coming over to his side after that incredibly display. He seems to have something even more nefarious in mind...

Kross is clutching his ribs with one hand, as with the other he snaps out and sets down one chair at a time from a large pile. He sets them up one facing the other, in a row of three, before seeing his opponent begin to stir. Rolling his eyes as the Rampage faithful start to rally behind the Gatekeeper, he's quick to intercept, ducking under a wild spinning backfist to seize an underhook. The other arm slides into position and he launches Phoenix with a painfully-abrupt exploder suplex, directly toward the readied net of chairs. It looks to be a painful landing, as--

--the crowd EXPLODES in appreciation! Winterborn tucks into a ball, and lands CROUCHED on the backs of two chairs, his eyes wide and arms momentarily pinwheeling as he finds his balance, then risks a glance back at Kross. Who looks absolutely disgusted. The arena is filled with vocal fireworks, and both men stare at each other a moment - and then move! Kross runs at Phoenix, who hops down onto the seat of the chairs, then falls backwards, kicking two of them into his opponent's midsection!

Kendrick Kross swears and tries to stumble around the obstacles, only to go crashing down, and Winterborn runs over his back, leaping toward the balanced ladder, and turning to rail Kross with it as the other man struggles to his feet! The steel steps clatter, and Winterborn stumbles with the weight, but then rights himself, tosses the ladder down next to Kross, then pulls the other man to his feet to lay in a stiff chop. Kendrick comes alive and fires back, but Winterborn weaves around it, snatches Kross by the skull and brings him crashing face-first into the edge of the ladder with a devastating downward spiral! PHOENIX DOWN!!

The crowd are stomping, clapping, and cheering, even forgetting about their need for another table as they rally behind the Gatekeeper, who sits up with a look of shock at this dramatic twist in the match. Kross is down and bleeding, and the ladder - dented and battered - is right there. Winterborn is on his feet in a jiffy, hauling the ladder up and slinging it over the top rope with a noisy clatter, before moving to slide up onto the apron...

KD: Winterborn's a veteran, and he's won matches like this before. He knows when to act. The time is now!

P-Dug: Well, good job, you're wrong again.

Cheers turn to boos as Kross, looking half-dead from that last collision, manages to flail his way to his feet for long enough to fall and grab Phoenix Winterborn's ankle! Phoenix crashes off the apron, going down in a tangle of limbs with his bloodied opponent, the two of them rolling around for supremacy, before it's KROSS who comes out on top, sliding into position with a leg grapevined, dripping blood and panting as he locks on a knee bar! THE KROSS BAR!! Winterborn screams, and struggles in vain, before with a surge of effort he manages to sit upright, hurling a desperate punch into Kross' busted nose. Both men cry out in agony, and Phoenix hits again, and again, until a limp Kross is forced to relinquish the hold...

Chi-Town's Finest tries to stand up, and succeeds on his third attempt, limping over to the apron with a nervous glance back at Kross. Into the ring he goes, gasping in pain as he comes up on the near-useless leg, turning to see Kendrick Kross pulling himself up on the apron. Phoenix shakes his head, and limps toward his opponent, who's ready with his hands on the top rope.

Kross springs up, and Winterborn shoots in for an instinctive superkick, but his knee buckles beneath him! Kross hits a flying nothing, soaring over the head of his opponent and barely missing the ladder as he rolls into a crouch. Phoenix turns where he's knelt, and Kendrick grabs the ladder, slamming it into the other leg-- but it stays there! Phoenix has grabbed the other side of it, and they again wrestle for control of this critical object! The crowd is firmly on the side of the injured veteran, who gets to his feet and despite the pain, grounds into both legs, wrenching back on the ladder. Kross grits his teeth and fights back, but as he gives a surge of effort... Winterborn smiles and lets go! CLANG! The ladder collides with Kendrick Kross, who's still holding it as he's launched up against the corner post, sandwiched there, dazed...

And too out of it to realise what the HELL is happening, as Phoenix Winterborn - to a gigantic ovation - springs onto the ladder, his injured leg trailing as he pulls himself up in spite of it, turns to eye the prize hanging over the ring...

And takes a dramatic flying leap, twisting in the air, his hand flying out--

KD: Oh my giddy goodness!

P-Dug: BullSHIT!

Winterborn is SHAKING, as he hangs there by one arm, reaching up to undo the clasp...

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, the recipient of five hundred THOUSAND dollars ... PHOENIX WINTERBORN!!!!

Nobody can believe it, least of all Kendrick Kross, who numbly drops the ladder and slumps in the corner, scowling, his chest blood-soaked and heaving, staring in disbelief at Winterborn, who has fallen with a crash to the canvas, and is laughing with relief and the adrenaline wash of triumph. There's not a quiet throat in the house as the crowd give their all in support of this victory, and Phoenix borrows their strength to climb to his feet, holding aloft his prize money and grinning ear-to-ear, completely defiant of the pain he's in.

KD: It's his first win of the season, and what a win it is! Kendrick Kross was surely the favorite here, but Phoenix Winterborn stands by his words and proves he is not a man to be taken lightly. He's the man to beat, the Gatekeeper of Friday Night Rampage, and he just locked Kross out in the cold! Congratulations, and dare I say it, welcome home!

P-Dug: Oh yeah, a real victory. Let's not pretend Kross didn't let him win - he just stood there, holding the ladder! I bet you $100,000 that Phoenix Winterborn paid HIM $100,000 to throw the match. That's the only explanation.

KD: Absolutely not. If everything you've said is true, Kross could have had the money to himself if he'd said no to that ridiculous proposal! This was a contest of skill, will, and quick thinking, and the Rampage fans know that Phoenix Winterborn has all of those things in spades. He simply took care of business, and he's going home having earned every dollar.

P-Dug: Didn't you say 'welcome home' just now? I guess this ain't his home, huh?

KD: Now you're just being pedantic. Folks, don't go anywhere because next up we have... another mystery match! Stay tuned!

Camera cuts to ...

Narumi appears via satellite on the extreme tron appearing mysteriously aloof.

Narumi: There I was just doing my regular rounds observing some of the future on the roster, wondering who will be exciting future battles or at least tasty fresh meat to consume, you know regular oni activity. Until to my surprise one of them was trying to summon me! Mr. Chris Page!

Haven't you ever seen what happens in horror movies when people try to call forth powers beyond their understanding? Yokai aren't exactly all devils like people think, but we're strange phenomenons that aren't to be trifled with. You've got guts challenging me! Or maybe you're still high off your Parabellum win?

She smiles knowingly with mischief.

Narumi: But I get it, you didn't call me out because I'm an oni. The original king of Rampage doesn't seem to be around anymore and I ended the era of the queen, so to live up to the king moniker you want take on the princess. The hime side of me that's held many EWC gems and puts on stellar performances to captivate the masses is your perfect shot to have a time under the bright spotlight. As you probably gathered by the Night of Champion news…..

The crowd begins to speak in hush tones about what they've heard.

Narumi: I accept!

The crowd cheers as Narumi's mischievous smile widens.

Narumi: But understand you don't get to dance with just one side of me. Burn me? Even your brands greatest exorcist couldn't purge from my transcendent throne, none can stop me from giving the fans the thrills they deserve! They crave sublime arts of violence that'll haunt you Mr Page! See you at the bayou.

Narumi hits the Shinijoshi double deuces as the tron feed goes out and the show continues.

We return to ringside where there's not a table, ladder, or chair in sight.

KD: Narumi Tsutsumi is ready to bring the fight to Chris Page at Night Of Champions! But now, it's time to reach back into Grizzly Duggan's magic hat and find out the competitors for our next match!

P-Dug: What kind of hat is it? Nah, don't answer that. He's definitely a pork pie kinda dude.

Chriqui: The following match is for one fall. Introducing first, from Topeka, Kansas, and weighing in at two hundred and seventy three pounds... GIDEON GAGE!!!

Gideon Gage comes out onto the stage. He barely even pays attention to the fans all booing him as he heads down the ramp. He enters the ring, and roars out at the crowd as pyro goes off from the ring posts.

P-Dug: Fuck! Yes! Wait, how much prize money does Gage get? More than $500k, right? ...right?

KD: I'm more interested in who his very unlucky opponent is going to be.

The lights in the arena go dark as a video appears on the jumbo screen of a man holding a steel guitar. Just as the [5:37] entrance theme plays for Moonshine Inc., the view cuts to Camera B (the entrance camera) as one brother (Jimmy) is seen casually walking out onto the stage. Looking to his side, his brother then makes his way through the curtain and stands beside him. Loud reactions from the crowd of cheers and boos fill the arena.

Chriqui: And his opponents ... at a combined weight of four hundred and sixty pounds, they are the team of Jimmy and Matt Evans ... MOONSHINE INCORPORATED!!

Not reacting to the crowd, they casually walk to the the bottom of the rampway and go separate ways. Jimmy slides under the bottom rope as does Matt and now on their feet, the crowd reacts loudly as Zack Tyler makes his way through the entrance curtain and to the ring. Both brothers look on as Zack walks to the ring. Matt and Jimmy go about their usual testing the ropes as Zack makes his way ringside. Both Jimmy and Matt point at him and tell him to "stay there" pointing to a chair by the ramp as their music fades away and the match to soon begin.

KD: Uh. I don't see a partner for Gideon Gage, but to be perfectly honest I have my doubts that he needs one. He already told us he'd gladly take on Moonshine Incorporated by himself, and I suppose he's going to?

P-Dug: He doesn't need shit except money to pay those fines. Grizzly Duggan has screwed him again, big bro!

Gideon Gage Vs Moonshine Inc - Handicap Match

DING DING DING

Gage lets out an animalistic roar, as he's immediately swarmed Matt and Jimmy. Matt unleashes a flurry of punches, battering the gargantuan brute's head, as Jimmy weaves around the side and lays in precise shots to the liver - to an alarming lack of effect. In fact, Gideon Gage starts to laugh, letting them fall on top of him in desperation, Jimmy struggling to secure a sleeper hold before with another bellow, the powerhouse HURLS both men away from him. Jimmy scrambles through the ropes to the outside, but Matt is flung into the center of the ring on his ass, trying to schooch away only to find Gage descending.

CRACK! A boot nails him in the jaw, and then he's being unceremoniously hauled upwards, off his ass, his feet briefly kicking in the air before Gage hits him with a ring-shuddering gutwrench suplex. The more raucous Moonshiner struggles to his feet, only to be blasted with a shoulder block. Matt goes down, rolls to his feet again, and stares at Gage wide-eyed. The behemoth licks his lips, and beckons him on, prompting Matt to crack his neck and then run into a shoulder block of his own! Whump.

Gideon Gage doesn't fucking move. He shoves Matt in the chest, then launches into a FLYING shoulder block that pitches the smaller man toward the ropes! He bounces right back into the clutches of Gage - who, astonishingly, landed on his feet like he wasn't launching himself through the air a half-second ago. Up Matt goes for a second time, where he's spun through the air and then brought down with a cataclysmic spinebuster. It looks too damn easy for Gideon, who roars to his feet, beating his chest.

The crowd pop as Jimmy slides back into the ring, straight into a basement dropkick! Gage stumbles, and a second kick forces him onto one knee, the Moonshiner following up quickly with a European uppercut that momentarily floors the giant. Jimmy uses the opening to help his partner upright, the two coordinating quickly, separating once Gage surges back to his feet - and each throwing up 'I love you' signs to a surge of appreciation from the fans in Dimitris, before turning to strike with tandem dropkicks! Gage is flung into the ropes, the entire ring lurching as he catches himself there.

KD: Matt Evans recovered magnificently to coordinate with his brother there, and they have Gideon Gage quite literally on the ropes. This might have been the worst possible matchup for this unholy terror of a man.

P-Dug: Nah, his worst matchup would be big Grizz. He just needs to catch his breath. These boys gon' die.

Jimmy Evans runs interference on Brian Spade, engaging him on his favorite subject - poker - as Zack Tyler moves to the apron and grabs both of Gideon Gage's ankles. The giant is furious, and tries to twist and grab at the brothers' manager. Matt acts fast, dashing into a big boot, slinging his body up over the larger man and using the weight to push his throat down across the ropes. Gage gurgles and froths at the mouth, his eyes bulging as he struggles to bellow, "FFFFFFffFFFf---" Matt throws up an arm to encourage the crowd, riding the big man like a bucking Bronco, as Tyler does his best to keep him in place, skidding back and forth on the outside as Gideon thrashes his mighty legs this way and that.

Spade finally notices the mess, and pushes Jimmy Evans aside, running to break up the situation by administering a count. Tyler backs off on the count of four, and Matt slips down from atop Gage, holding up his hands for about a second before he's rejoined by his brother and the pair of them leap back onto Gage, fists flying, feet stomping, until they succeed in bringing the muscular brute down a second time. Jimmy pulls the downed Gideon across his knee, dropping a few sharp elbows across the midsection, as Matt bounds onto the middle rope, throws up his arms to cajole the crowd, and then leaps into a flying elbow!

DECAPITATION! The Rampage faithful go nuts as Matt bounces Gage's skull off his partner's knee with a savage blow. Swiftly, they bundle up Gage, who's frothing at the mouth again, "FFffffFFffFFFFF---" Rolling him well away from the ropes before covering him with a double lateral press, both wide-eyed and straining with effort to keep the big bastard down.

ONE...



TWO...



TH-- "FFFFFUUUUUCK YOOOOU!!!!"

Both brothers fly in opposite directions, as Gideon Gage finds his voice and drives up off the mat, grabbing both of them by the skull before they can get too far, and with FREAKISH strength dragging them back together for a skull-to-skull collision. The crowd cry out in sympathy, as both brothers are bust open by a second crack of their heads, and Gage lets Matt fall to the canvas, hurling Jimmy up onto one shoulder and lawn darting him at the corner post! The cannier brother goes limp, but is immediately propped up against the turnbuckle. Gideon Gage turns away...

...plucks up Matt, and scoop slams into his brother, before stomping into the opposite corner and taking off running.

Shock! Awe! Meat on meat! He does his best to collapse Moonshine Incorporated into one fleshy lump with a monstrous avalanche press! The crowd fucking hate it, because they fucking hate Gideon Gage, who responds to their outpouring of derision by bending over and showing half of them his rippling ass. He makes his cheeks dance, as he flips the double bird to the rest of the crowd and - because he's a charitable dude - ensures all the blind bitches in the audience also know he feels about them.

"FUCK RAMPAGE! FUCK GRIZZLY DUGGAN!"

P-Dug: Tell us how you feel, G!

KD: This is an outrage, it's almost like he's come here just to disrespect us!

Throwing caution to the wind, Zack Tyler slides back into the ring bearing a steel chair, and he's immediately accosted by Spade - who's in the process of trying to snatch away the foreign object when he's KNOCKED THE FUGGOUT. SMASH GAGE, SMASH! Gideon has decided the official needs to get fucked too, leaving him in a pile on the floor and then roaring at Zack Tyler to do it already. CLANG! CLANG! CLANG! Three hefty crashes bend the chair over Gage's skull, leaving blood trickling from his fractured skull, and absolutely failing to have any more of an effect than that. Gideon Gage is laughing again, reaches out to grab the heavily-damaged chair... and then gets rolled up from behind by both members of Moonshine Incorporated! Oh shit!

ONE...



TWO...



KICKOUT!

Gideon Gage is more incensed than his default - which is to say, very lots. He rolls back to his feet, bugs his eyes out at Matt and Jimmy Evans, then hits them both with a double SGS lariat, flipping both men head over heels before they crash to the canvas. Beating his chest, he plants a foot on both their faces and demands the unconscious official make a count.

He doesn't.

There's blood all over the canvas from all three men, and it gives the Moonshiners just a little extra leverage as they scramble out from under Gage's boots, the monster slip-sliding on the pooling ichor. He doesn't quite go down-- at least until Jimmy and Matt erupt into another all-too familiar tag team maneuver, hitting an impactful legsweep and jumping roundhouse! TOTAL ELIMINATION! Gideon is slammed to the mat, and Matt lunges in for the cover, only to get stopped by his brother, who instead directs traffic to help muscle the powerhouse up into position for a tombstone piledriver. Matt is shaking, yelling in rage and pain as he holds Gage in place, the crowd losing their damn minds as Jimmy hits the ropes, and baseball slides between his brother's legs - WHAM! Planting his feet in Gage's big dumb head, as Matt drops down to nail the tombstone! BUZZING!!

Matt's too tired to cover properly, slumping over Gage, as... the official starts the count? Wait, that's not Brian Spade, it's Zack Tyler in an ill-fitting ref shirt...!

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THR-- "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!!!"

P-Dug: Oh no! I peed myself!

KD: Me too.

Gideon Gage rises again, with Jimmy Evans held upright in a military press. Matt scrabbles to try and tackle him to the floor, but it's like trying to spear a boulder. Gage gurns mightily, all bull shark testosterone and vascularity as he does a few reps with Jimmy, then drops him across his shoulder... and into a monstrous cutter! FINISHER ENGAGED!

Jimmy Evans is OUT, but Matt is raining punches on the powerhouse like the world's most violent gnat. Gage is bruised and battered, looking through a crimson mask with a snarl, as he steps into a headbutt, catching the limp form of Matt Evans on its way to earth, hauling him up into a vertical suplex position. Which he delays, of course, holding the remaining Moonshiner up with one arm as he turns toward referee Zack Tyler, who's retrieved the battered chair and looks to come to the rescue.

Gage looks past him at the hard cam, flexes a bicep, and plants a loving, bloody kiss on it, before spinning around and finally dropping Matt Evans - straight across Zack Tyler, the broken chair sandwiched between them. Gideon rises to a crouch and looks around, nostrils flaring as he sees Jimmy somehow clawing his way to his feet. "I SAID--" Bellows Gage, dropping into ten rapid, furious pushups, then springing toward the ropes. "FUCK!" He rebounds, right into the Pounce From Hell! "YOOOOOOOOOOOU!!!"

DESTRUCTION ENGAGED!

Jimmy Evans is going to need some medical help, and possibly an adult, as his drooling, bloody form is lovingly scooped up by Gage, and planted on the pile of bodies now making up the entirety of the Left Hand. The brute collapses atop them...

And Brian Spade crawls over, shirtless, to make a very slow count.

ONE!
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.
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
.
.
THREE!!!

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via pinfall ... GIDEON GAGE!!!!

The crowd rain down their spite and hatred, but as Gage himself has pointed out - this isn't a large arena, and there's not THAT many people in attendance. Certainly not enough to drown out the awesome din of Gideon himself... who is all tuckered out from blood loss and burning, borderline-erotic rage. He's SNORING. Brian Spade grits his teeth and tries to tiptoe away before the slumbering beast awakens and pulls him up on that slow count. Sleepy Naptime Gideon Gage is best Gideon Gage, as far as he's concerned.

KD: That was certainly a match. Moonshine Incorporated pulled out all the stops, and Zack Tyler did everything he could to spare us from having to congratulate the worst man in the entire world, but it was all for naught. I've got word that we have a team en route to tranquilize and evacuate Gideon Gage, so please, pray with us that we can safely remove him from the building.

P-Dug: What the fuck? Why have I just been handed a memo saying Gideon Gage is being fined $75 for a replacement ref's shirt?!

KD: Does he even have that much to spare, at this point? Whatever. Let's head to commercial so we can get a change of pants, and our competitors can prepare themselves for the next contest. Great news! None of you have to face Gideon Gage!

Camera cuts to ...

We open up backstage, with Aiya sitting on a bench alone, clearly steeling herself for the Mystery Pool match. Her head quickly lifts as a knock echoes on her door. Her eyes close as she lets out an exhale before walking forward and opening the door, grinning as she finds herself face to face with Brian Spade.

Spade: Hello there! Got time for a few words?

Aiya nods, giving him a small smile.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: Yeah, actually. And since I have a decent idea on what you wanna know ...

She pauses, taking a moment to figure out her exact feelings right then and there.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: It wouldn't be wrong to say I'm still a bit anxious. The unknown is by far scarier than knowing ahead of time you're gonna face a tough opponent. But that same sense of nervousness?

Her smile widens.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: It's giving me one hell of an adrenaline rush, so I'm definitely bringing that in, as well as any weapons should the match allow it.

Spade: Is there anyone in particular you're hoping to face?

Aiya pauses, going silently over the list again before replying.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: Well ... Gideon Gage is someone I still wouldn't mind. I admit, however, it'd be interesting to face Jason. It's been a hell of a while since we ever fought together, and that would be a damn good way to thank him for inviting me to the Club and EWC. Also, he's one of the few people who actually spoke of and acknowledged me properly. So if only for that reason, he's high up on my list. That said ... Phoenix better hope he's not my opponent because ...

Aiya looks past Brian and right at the camera crew.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: You absolute dumbass. I was floored when I heard you try to say we'd never fought before. You serious?! Did you really forget last year's invasion? Did I make you lose too many brain cells? I can only guess so, because ... if you re-watch episode 504 of Rampage, you'll see we faced off there.

Aiya chuckles, shaking her head.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: I hate to be that person, but clearly it is indeed for the best that you're leaving after this season. That lack of awareness? It's a good reason you were never able to hold gold for so long, and likewise why you lost it so damn fast. Good riddance.

Spade: Can we expect to see you again this season?

Aiya smirks as she chckles softly, quickly nodding.

Spade: I've merely been choosing my battles carefully, particularly my singles ones, though that applies to any frankly. But yes, I definitely will be. I'm hoping to give the people something I think they would want to witness once more. Round two of "Headhuntress" Aiya versus .... Lavender!

Sure enough, the crowd pops at the mention of a potential future match up. Aiya points to herself as she adds on.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: And I, personally, would love that. I've seen how she's grown since we last met ... and I'd love to see for myself just how much she's improved since then. Now then ...

Aiya steps out of the locker room and slips past Brian Spade.

"Headhuntress" Aiya: I've got a fight to go to. But yes, you absolutely will see me again. With or without Narumi or any of my other Shinijoshi comrades!

Aiya takes a few seconds to strike the Shinijoshi pose before the camera fades to ringside where we cut to the commentary booth.

KD: So far we've seen ladder matches, handicap matches and first blood matches! I wonder what is next!

P-Dug: Probably find another way to try and screw over Gideon Gage.

Chriqui: The following match is a singles match. Coming to the ring from Kyoto, Japan, weighing in at 137 pounds, she is one of the Shinijoshi ... HEADHUNTRESS AIYA!!!

As “Dark Seeks Light” by Yui Ninomiya plays over the PA system, a fog appears near the curtains. As it slowly fades away, we see the form of “Headhuntress” Aiya standing at the top of the ramp. She saunters down, entering the ring through the middle and top ropes. Aiya then leans against the ring, already looking as if she’s making a game plan in her head whilst waiting for her opponent to enter the ring.

Chriqui: And her opponent from Brooklyn, NY & weighing in at 215 pounds... THE BOSS JASON ANDERSON!!!

The arena lights start to flash on and off as NF- No Excuses came over the speakers as smoke appears on the Extreme Tron in big letters with his picture Jason Anderson “The Boss”. Jason appears on the stage wearing his hood over his head standing on his right is David and on his left is Diana wearing all leather black with her shades on her face and blow pop in her mouth. Jason play to the crowd a bit as Dave and Diana walked on his side walking with him down to the ring.

He get inside of the ring and pop the hood off his head like AJ Styles on the top rope point a finger down to Angel. She is jumping up and down for her father as he grins and winks at her as he jump down off the corner ropes. He look right at the person across from him while he take off his hood jacket and start to test ropes a bit.

KD: Wow! RAMPAGE Vs PRIME between two street tough fighters with important roots in Japan.

P-Dug: It's a good thing this is just a singles match!

Jason Anderson Vs Headhuntress Aiya - Singles Match

DING DING DING

With the ring of the bell, Jason Anderson and Headhuntess Aiya make their ways into the center of the ring. Jason Anderson offers Aiya a handshake, Aiya in return gives him a slap. Upon impact, Jason jumps up off his feet and brings his knee right into Aiya's jaw. That impact sends Aiya stumbling backwards, Jason rushes forward and gives Aiya a lariat that sends her over the top rope to the padded concrete. Jason rushes to the opposite ropes, and then he comes in hot flying between the top and middle rope into a suicide di... Aiya brings her elbow up and clocks Jason on the side of the head to stop the dive! Jason stumbles backwards into the center of the ring, Aiya jumps up on the apron, vaults over to the middle rope and then she springs off that into a flying roundhouse right into Jason's temple. Aiya drags Jason up by his head, takes-a-back, and then pulls him up and down into a delayed German suplex, with a bridge!

ONE!
.
... KICKOUT BY JASON ANDERSON

KD: That forearm did a lot of damage to Jason, and he's really feeling those affects now!

P-Dug: She might have gotten him in the ear bro, and when you throw off someone's equilibrium, that's bad news bears.  

Aiya drags Jason up by his ear, and then floors him up and down with a spinebuster. Aiya makes her way over to the corner and scales it. She sizes up her target and then leaps down into an elbow drop, Jason is able to just roll out of the way as Aiya hits hard! Aiya jumps up to her feet holding her arm in pain, Jason comes up from the side and superkick right into the jaw! The kick sends Aiya stumbling and falling to her knees in the center of the ring. Jason comes up from behind and sends a big punt kick into the small of her back. Jason makes the cover!

ONE!
.
.
.
TW.. KICKOUT BY HEADHUNTRESS AIYA. 

Jason spins Aiya around and throws a few punches from a full-mount. Then he drags her into a seated position and knees her between the eyes. Jason grabs her up and sends her up into the corner with an Irish-whip. Jason rushes the corner and goes for a rising knee, but Aiya catches up and drops him hard with a powerbomb, both are down! 

P-Dug: Big time counter from Aiya, that powerbomb took as much out of her as it did Jason, but I think Jason's still worse for wear at this point. 

KD: I think you're not wrong about that. 

Aiya pulls herself up and shakes off the cobwebs. Then she drags Jason up and shoves him away from her. Aiya comes in and smashes her foot into Jason's head with a big-boot, Jason is sent backwards into the ropes and on the rebound he catches another big boot, backwards into the ropes, rebound into big boot, backwards into the ropes, rebound into a roundhouse kick! The kick spins Jason around and lands him on his knees. Aiya grabs on a sleeper and then rips Jason backwards into a snap-dragon with a bridge!

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
... KICKOUT BY JASON ANDERSON

Aiya drags Jason up to a hunched over position and then she starts to throw Kawada kicks into his face and forehead. After the final kick Aiya drags Jason up for another spinebuster, but Jason grabs her head and brings her down into a DDT! Jason keeps Aiya in a guillotine and yells out as she starts punching and slapping and fighting, but after ten or so seconds, Aiya stops fighting and after another five seconds she's limp. Jason drops the hold and rolls Aiya onto her back. Jason rushes to the corner, and scales to the top, and leaps down into Jason's Score, the breathtaking fliptastic move off the top rope and it... doesn't connect, Aiya moves out of the way! Jason hits the canvas hard, hard enough to bounce up to his feet while holding himself in pain. Aiya pulls herself up with the help of the top rope, and she throws her all into a superkick at Jason... but Jason catches the kick and lifts Aiya up and down with a powerbomb into his knees, Prince Stomp! Aiya rolls around in pain holding her back as both the punt kick and Prince Stomp have got it feeling mighty tender. Jason pulls himself up, still grabbing his stomach. Aiya pulls herself up, still grabbing her back. Aiya extends her hand for a handshake, Jason smiles and shakes back, then quickly hits The Flash right-hook out of nowhere! Aiya stumbles back, rocked and wobbled, Jason spins around and catches her with between the eyes with the point of his elbow of a BJA!!! Aiya falls like a sack of puppies and Jason makes a cover while yelling out in pain holding his midsection. 

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THREE!!!

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via pinfall ... JASON ANDERSON!!!!

Jason Anderson helps Aiya to her feet, and the two exchange a legitimate handshake. Jason hoists Aiya's arm up and she gives him a little point for good sportsmanship. Aiya heads to the back, Jason poses with some fans and then he heads back himself. 

KD: Jason Anderson with a big win here tonight. He's not booked for Night Of Champions, but I think that makes him an even bigger favorite to win at EWC Rumble this year!

P-Dug: And Aiya, she's in a slump right now but she's as deadly as ever. When the wins start stacking, the bodies in her wake will be immense I'm sure. 

KD: I'm sure you're right, and those bodies will be nothing compared to if you touch that dial!

Camera cuts to ...

We open up backstage with The Titaness wandering through the halls of the Dimitris Tofalos Arena. The crowd cheers from seeing her back on Rampage, the noise causing her to happily grin. She twists her head from side to side a few times, causing it to let out a few cracks and pops. Before she arrives at the ramp, Brian Spade emerges.

Spade: Titaness! Glad I was able to catch you real fast! Mind elaborating on a few things for me and the audience?

Sam smiles at the inquiry.

Samantha: Not at all. Just keep in mind I may or may not choose to reveal all of the answers. Some of them will likely be addressed in future promos.

Spade: So ... you had some very strong words for Jamie Love and even admitted you had cut ties with Tommy Love. Does this mean you're completely out of the Love Club?

Sam swiftly shakes her head, holding her index finger up to silently signal for Spade to wait before asking any further questions.

Samantha: So here's the thing about that situation. There are definitely certain members I'm finding myself not so fond of. And frankly, it isn't just Jamie that falls under this category. I can safely say that I easily prefer The Southern Express over 3pAC, and I have no qualms explaining why. I mean, goodness, they didn't have the decency to get your own name right. Sure, the Express had their own ego problem. But they at least treated others with actual respect.

I honestly pity Bunny a bit. She was making sure her contract remained intact ... and wound up finding two of the scummiest people around to become a valet for. Hell, they don't always treat Bunny with the decency and respect she deserves! It's just ... their attitude is so disgusting. I refuse to acknowledge them.

As of now, I'd go so far as to say these are the people I will ever consider true members of the Love Club; Xavier, Ibuki, Gabi, Buddy and Bunny Love and hell ... even Jason is in his own rights.

The crowd roars in approval of her answer. Spade starts to toss over his next inquiry before Sam interrupts him.

Samantha: What you and everyone else is going to see, Brian, is something a lot of people asked when I originally allowed Tommy to be my manager. I'm going back to the 'standalone Shieldmaiden', the one that kicked ass without any real help. Now note that I only fired Tommy. Joseph agreed to remain home with Lio to watch over the children, otherwise he would also be here as my manager.

Spade: Perfectly fair. Speaking of, how are the little ones?

Sam smiles as Brian asks about her twins.

Samantha: Very happy and healthy. They'll be ten months on the 22nd. To say I feel blessed is an understatement.

Spades: Really? Already almost ten months?

Samantha: I know, right? Tempus fugit and all of that jazz.

When Sam notices the puzzled look on Spade's face, she chuckles and translates for him.

Samantha: Time flies, my dear.

Spade: Ahh yes, thank you. I literally got lost in translation, it seems.

Both share a brief chuckle before Brian speaks up again.

Spade: So last - but certainly not least - is there anyone in particular you're hoping to face?

Samantha: Well ... obviously, I won't be able to control this. That said, I will be more than happy to face off against anyone, be it a new face or someone I've gone against before. However ... let's pretend it was my choice. I actually wouldn't mind going against Cosmo one of these days. He really does seem like a damn good choice for Rookie of the Year, and I would love to test myself against him. Gideon Gage could be fun .. though not for him.

Sam flashes a wink at the camera as her smirk mixes in with her smile.

Samantha: And if I had to choose a third person for my top 3 ... I'd have to say Kendrick Kross, if only to even out the score between us. I may not have a grudge anymore, but I do want to see about securing a win against him at least once. But as I said ... anyone from not just this Mystery Pool fight, but also the roster and even company? Bring them on! I'll happily accept any and every challenge!

Brian looks as if he wanted to speak up and say he wasn't quite done, but is interrupted by the crowd. Sam manages to take advantage of Brian being distracted to slip away and resume walking towards the ramp. Brian lets out a defeated sigh and reluctantly begins looking for someone else to speak with. Camera fades / we now return to .. etc

We return to ringside where again the ringside area seems pretty bare.

KD: Maybe back to back standard matches.

P-Dug: Nah, our brother is too psychopathic for that.

Chriqui: The following match is a first blood match!

P-Dug: I told you.

FIRST BLOOD FIRST BLOOD FIRST BLOOD

KD: This crowd definitely wants their blood!

Chriqui: Introducing first from Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, weighing in at one hundred and sixty-five pounds, she is ... SAMANTHA HAMILTON!!!

'My Mother Told Me' – L.B.ONE, Datamotion ft Perly i Lotry blares over the PA system. As it does, we see the forms of The Titaness standing at the top of the ramp. The Titaness saunters down the ramp, proudly wearing her war paint and Norse outfit as she makes her way to the ring.

When she finally gets to the ropes, the Titaness will slip through the middle and top ropes, then proceed to lean against the nearest turnbuckle. While she patiently waits for her opponent(s), she begins making a game plan in her head.

Chriqui: And her opponent from Miami Beach, Florida & weighing in at 223 pounds... TYLER BRADFORD!!!

"Iconic" by Jaxon Gamble hits and Tyler Bradford steps out from behind the tron, he looks out at the crowd solemnly as a few of them remember him and still boo and jeer the former 2x FX Broadcast Champion. He pulls his suit jacket tight, looks down sadly, and marches his way to the ring paying the fans no attention. He gets into the ring and awaits his opponent, staring off up the ramp.

KD: Samantha Hamilton's first proper match back on Rampage, and it's defending against BRAWL!

P-Dug: This is also Tyler's first match on Rampage in a long time, interesting bout on paper.

Tyler Bradford Vs Samantha Hamilton - First Blood

DING DING DING

With the ring of the bell, Samantha Hamilton wastes no time rushing at Tyler Bradford and sending him out of the ring with a massive big boot to the face. Samantha follows Tyler to the outside, and she clubs him in the back. Tyler takes a few steps forward flexing his back in pain. Samantha spins him around, but Tyler catches her with an eye gouge. Sam Ham stumbles backwards, and Tyler catches her on the button with a superkick. Tyler flips off the camera and pretends to limp because of his back. Tyler goes up under the ring and grabs a chair, he spins around and swings it wildly at Sam but she just moved, probably saving this match. 

KD: I think that wild chair shot definitely would have busted her open, good dodging there. 

P-Dug: If I was either of these two, I'd take this back into the ring. Less chances to get bloodied there. 

Tyler brings up the chair and swings wildly to his left trying to get Sam, but she ducks the chair and pulls him down into a neckbreaker. Sam gets up to her feet and rolls into the ring. After a few moments, Tyler joins her and slides in himself. Sam stomps him in the back of the head as he gets in, before grabbing his arm and sending him up into an Irish-Whip. On the rebound Sam rushes in for a spear, but Tyler catches it with an arm-drag reversal. Sam hits the canvas hard and rolls up to her feet, right into a left hook from Tyler Bradford. Sam falls flat on her ass, and Tyler jumps into a low dropkick. After a few moments of taunting the camera, Tyler drags Sam up by her hair and sends her into the ropes with a highly modified Irish-whip. On the rebound Tyler does nothing more than a bitch slap, he doesn't even more from where he was standing. The entire crowd goes silent as Sam just looks down at the canvas, her face already beet red. Sam looks up right into Tyler's eyes, and he slaps her again. And again. Sam throws her hand forward and punches Tyler right in his Adam's apple. Tyler stumbles back, gasping for breath. Sam takes-a-back and rips Tyler into a delayed German suplex. Tyler rolls through and grabs a waist-lock to yeet Sam backwards into a high-release German, dropping her on the back of her neck from probably six foot up! Both competitors are down!

P-Dug: Good lord, those German's both looked awful. Samantha and Tyler taking years off now, at this point I'd just blade myself and spare my career. 

KD: Well neither of these two are cowardly enough for that, even Tyler Bradford is fighting more than you would Polar!

Sam and Tyler pull each other up by their head. Tyler headbutts Sam, Sam headbutts Tyler, they headbutt each other at the same time. Both stumble backwards, Tyler jumps into a superkick, Sam jumps into a big boot. Tyler throws a punch, Sam throws a forearm into Tyler's jaw. Tyler stomps Sam's foot and then he floors her with a giant lariat! Something he picked up from Gideon Gage I'm sure. Sam pulls herself up to a seated position. Tyler flies in looking for the PK, but Sam rolls backwards to avoid the kick, and then uses her momentum to roll up to her feet and bring Tyler down with a neckbreaker. Sam keeps her hands around Tyler's head as she rolls up to her feet and drags Tyler up with her onto her shoulders. Sam rushes the ropes and throws Tyler down, sending him face first into the corner of the steel steps. The edge tears into Tyler's forehead and he's busted open! 

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via busting open Tyler Bradford ... SAMANTHA HAMILTON!!!!

Tyler gets to his feet outside, and tries to argue the ref that a fan threw ketchup on his face is all. Samantha Hamilton raises her arms in the ring and yells out in victory.

KD: Great match there, and Samantha Hamilton gets a nice victory off a smart move. 

P-Dug: I'm going to be honest, that could really be ketchup on his head... 

KD: I don't know about that, but I do know apparently something is brewing backstage.

Camera cuts to the back where we see Candice Tweed.

Candice Tweed: We've heard from several competitors in the mystery pool tonight. We have all heard from them before but the one I'm most interested in is.... (she looks off screen)

The camera pans over and we see a figure dressed all in black with a black hood and black lipstick. She is just standing there staring at Candice.

Candice: I can only assume this is our newcomer Vespertine.

Vespertine: (takes off the hood, her hair is tied up in a top knot) And your assumption would be right.

Candice: How did you do that? One minute there was nothing. Next minute you just.... appeared.

Vespertine: Would you believe it's a 1000 year old magic trick. Straight from Korea. But I'm sure that's not why you called me here.

Candice: I don't.... I didn't. I'm sure that-

Vespertine: Never mind. Do you have questions now that I AM here.

Candice: Ok, well. You beat Scrappy Coco in your first match here, your debut match which turned a lot of heads and raised lot of eyebrows. You've seen what some of the other competitors in tonight's mystery pool are saying about you. Some are calling you mysterious, some are calling you a wild card, some think you will fail once you get in the ring, others don't know what to think.

Vespertine: What do you think?

Candice: Me? You're asking me? Your asking for my opinion?

Vespertine raises an eyebrow and sighs a slow sigh.

Vespertine: I see. Very beautiful but not much in the way of brains. I guess it doesn't matter what you think about me. Or what the rest of the field thinks about me. Because soon, you will know me. You will know my name. You will know me for the ring warrior that I am. The fighting spirit I claim to be. I am Vespertine. I am the Well Rounded Fighting Machine, the Asian Invasion or Sensation whichever way you look at it. I am Elegance Personified. I am the Pretty Little Poison. I am the one who will be standing with her hand raised in victory when all is done and the smoke clears. Tonight starts my rise to greatness. Tonight starts my rise to the top of Friday Night Rampage. Tonight starts my rise to rule the EWC. And it all starts with a pool. A mystery pool. I am the best this sport has to offer. I am the best you will ever see. Quite simply, though, I am the best at what I do because I am better than each and every person that I face in this mysterious pool. Make no mistake because if you do, if you underestimate me, you are already a failure.

Candice: Really? Because I thought-

Vespertine (interrupting) You haven't seen 1/10th of what I can do. I change, I evolve, I improvise while I am in the ring. If you thought you knew anything about me before, I will have changed it up since then. You never know what you will step in the ring with. Mysterious? I can be. A wild card? Most definitely. A failure. NOT...at...all. And if you have to think about it, you are already a step behind. None of you know what is coming. You think I'm in the ring with you. NO. YOU are...in... the... ring...with...ME! Tell me otherwise and I'll tell you: I do it because I can, I can because I want to, I want to... because you say I can't. She stares intensely into the camera. When you tell me I can't that's when you will feel death.... by....DIVA!

She goes off screen.

Candice: She disappeared into the shadows and the darkness. I don't know how or where or why but I'll stay right here. And YOU stay right there for this commercial break!

We return to ringside where the lights have been dimmed, the blood-stained canvas barely visible. There's an object suspended above the ring, but it can't quite be made out from the camera angle shown. The crowd is restless.

KD: The mystery only deepens as we press into the final half of our magical evening! Only four names remain undrawn. I have to wonder if we're finally going to see a tag team contest, little bro.

P-Dug: Remember how Duggan fucked over Gideon Gage? Could be another handicap match!

KD: Who would possibly be able to take on THREE other competitors?

P-Dug: I'unno. Melody Malone?

KD: W-We don't speak that name around here!

Chriqui: The following contest is a kendo stick on a pole match! Introducing first, from The Golden State, weighing in at two hundred and one pounds... COSMO GOLDWORTHY!!!

Gold and white lights strobe around the arena as 'Mo Money Mo Problems' blares through the PA boxes. Cosmo Goldworthy swaggers out with a smug grin on his face. He stops at the start of the ramp, extending his arms out. "Enjoy it while 'ya got it, baby!" He shouts out, chuckling to himself as he continues to walk down the ramp. Cosmo looks at the fans reaching out and sneers at them. He slides up the apron and enters the ring, proceeding to march over to the top rope and raise his arms up one more time. Cosmo nods his head to the tune of his theme song, dropping off the top rope. He shimmies his shoulders, removing his Louis Vuitton® sponsored entrance gear before the match begins.

KD: Love him, hate him, or love to hate him, Cosmo Goldworthy might be the hottest debut Friday Night Rampage has seen in a long time. The only trouble is, he knows it.

P-Dug:Hell yeah he does, and you oughtta recognize! This IS the man with the sexiest hands in showbiz.

KD: Excuse me, what?

Chriqui: And his opponent, coming down to the ring ... weighing in at one hundred and fifty six pounds ... from Brooklyn, New York ... accompanied by LUNA KNIGHT SAITOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ... LUKE "THE JOKER" SAITO!!!

The lights in the arena are slowly going off and on as on the top of the ramp only to see Luke standing there with his shades on his face with his long black coat on and standing behind him is Luna wearing the same coat but she has a hood with her and wearing the hood over her head. He grabs her hand and has her standing in front of her as he slowly removes her hood off her head as they both grin.

They both started walking down to the ramp together when the words “Rise” came blasting over the speakers. Luna was playing with the crowd as Luke kept walking slowly down to the ramp. Luna gets to the bottom as she stands on the outside of the ring while Luke stands behind her on top of the apron as the lights flash like crazy on the words “Rise” they put up a fist together. Luna then climbs inside of the ring with him and helps him out of his jacket. She holds it as they bump their heads together like they were praying before the match. She gives him a small kiss before climbing out of the ring as he starts to test the ropes.

KD: Cosmo fancies himself the finest striker in all of EWC, but Luke Saito is no joke in that regard, and we could argue he's a much more rounded competitor. We're in for a nailbiting contest here - even without the lingering threat of that kendo stick.

P-Dug: Mo' kendo stick, mo' problems, and Money Mo don't need that stick to whip this so-called 'underground fighter'. Pfft! 'Underground'. This goofball's just spent too long diving down rabbit holes and talking to sentient teacups, if you ask me.

Cosmo Goldworthy Vs Luke Saito - Kendo Stick On A Pole

DING DING DING

Saito looks like he's having fun already, as the two competitors circle, mutually raise a kickboxing guard, and swoop in one another in a dramatic spiral. Cosmo smirks just before they close to range, and as both men raise their legs to trade kicks, he delays his opening strike by a beat, and shifts minutely aside, rapidly switching stance to fire off a low kick instead. He hooks his leg at the culmination, ripping Saito's own leg from under him, then stepping in with an axe kick as the other man hits the canvas! Saito thinks fast, rolling aside to avoid having his sternum ruptured by the blow.

Goldworthy flicks a thumb across his nose, renews his dangerous smirk, and gives chase, keeping his guard up. But Saito's not quick to rise and resume striking, making his way to the ropes, then taking a page from the playbook of Inoki; he thrusts a foot out, not quite connecting flush as the refined kickboxer quickly turns his ankle against the blow, but using this distraction to dart forward and yank Cosmo into the ropes. The gambit pays off, and Saito's able to kip up in perfect time to catch the rebounding Cosmo around the waist, spinning him around into a spinebuster! The crowd pop for Luke, who looks positively thrilled to be here, guys, performing a little cartwheel to get back to his feet. Cosmo slaps the mat and rises quickly, too, only to get cut off by a searing roundhouse kick from his opponent! The crowd 'oooooh!'

Goldworthy takes a step back, puffs out his cheeks, and fires back with a kick of his own. The crowd oblige with an, 'aaaaaah!' Saito almost drops to a knee, but rolls his shoulders and lunges forward - going around an intercepting hook, and connecting with a high knee that drives Cosmo toward the corner. Money Mo seems to be stunned, and Luke dances on the spot for a second, getting the crowd firmly behind him before he dashes into the corner-- and finds Cosmo has the better of him, slipping out and around, snagging him into a volcanic uranage straight into that vacated spot against the turnbuckle! The collision shakes the ring!

KD: Anything you can do, I can do better, says Cosmo Goldworthy. He's determined to prove he can not only strike with the best of them, but lock up and throw his opponents around. Have we ever seen another competitor pick up our sport this fast?

P-Dug: Nope! Saito's gonna to pull a few rabbits out of the hat just to survive, big bro.

Cosmo is laying his knees into Saito, who lies across the corner now, trying to cover up to little avail, eating several hard shots to the gut and ribs before Goldworthy straightens up, casting the crowd a disdainful, smug glare and flicking imaginary lint from his shoulders. They're a little torn - he's GOOD. But he's also a DICK, and jeers overcome any other din pretty quickly. They've settled in once he climbs up and reaches for that hanging kendo stick, quite trivially balancing on the pole with one hand. His fingertips close around the weapon, and tug it down--

--just as Luke Saito rises up underneath him, back to the corner, hooking his arms up and under for a powerbomb.

No! Cosmo thinks fast, swiping Luke's arms away, then leaping and drilling down with both feet - a modified mushroom stomp! CASH COW! Saito collapses beneath the hefty blow, and with his face twisting in fury, Goldworthy drops a knee into his throat and starts choking him out - to the consternation of official Pierce Patterson, who moves in to break it up once he realizes what's going on. He's a little too late, and Luna Knight has already made her way to the apron, springing up and drilling Cosmo with a forearm, then grabbing the cocky rookie by the head and dragging him out over the top rope...

Demonstrating her strength, she catches him in her arms, turns, and takes a couple of steps forward before HURLING Cosmo at the ring steps! CRASH!! The crowd swells, as Pierce administers a stern warning to Luna, who yells something about not messing with her man, but takes her leave with a shake of her head, looking with concern toward Luke. He's having some difficulty breathing, but manages a smile of approval to his wifey, then flicking his mischievous gaze toward Cosmo, who's struggling to his feet. Luke glances up at the kendo stick, getting a yell of approval from the Rampage fans - and takes this as his sign.

A moment later, he's pulling the weapon down, then carefully walking along the top rope. Cosmo is still shaking off the cobwebs when Saito hunkers down and pounces off the taut line, twisting into a backflip in mid-air to land behind his opponent with the kendo stick across his throat...!

"HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!"

There's an another almighty crash as Cosmo Goldworthy is introduced to the rough end of a weaponized JOKER POKER FACE! The reverse DDT sends him crunching into the ring steps a second time, the back of his skull rebounding sickeningly off the metal surface. Saito jerks upright, momentarily celebrating before a look of concern for his opponent creases his features. The crowd cheer him on, and he rallies, the twinkle back in his eyes as he honorably drops the kendo stick and starts to pick up Cosmo, dragging him toward the ring. Goldworthy's a bit of a dead weight, and it takes a deal of effort to maneuver him under the bottom rope.

P-Dug: This is the guy they're cheering for? He almost killed Cosmo Goldworthy, and now he can't even seal the deal with those noodles he calls arms...

KD: This is a kendo stick on a pole match. Luke Saito just improvised excellently, hitting a springboard backflip reverse DDT after walking the top rope like a circus performer... putting that kendo stick to use... and you're complaining?

P-Dug: You bet your ass I am! His woman should be banned from ringside, too.

Luke pauses for breath against the rope, before sliding into the ring... straight into a roll-up from Cosmo Goldworthy, who's looking rattled but has the wherewithal to instinctively make the cover AND kick his feet up onto the bottom rope, adding some much-needed extra leverage. Saito reaches for the ropes himself, but can't quite get there!

ONE...



TWO...



THR-- KICKOUT!

The Rampage faithful give voice to their relief and explode in favor of the Joker, who looks like he's seen a ghost. Luna has seen more than that, and is loudly complaining about Cosmo's dirty tactic, distracting Patterson; who fails to see the thunderous low blow that Cosmo delivers a moment later. Luke Saito, not even halfway to his feet, crumples onto his knees and falls forward in pain and shock, getting an indignant bellow from his partner. She tries to get into the ring, but is blocked by the official, while a smirking Cosmo rolls out of the ring to retrieve the kendo stick. Patterson turns around, and sees Luke clutching at his nethers - putting two and two together but having no evidence, as Goldworthy gives the kendo stick a few testing swipes on the outside of the ring, followed by a scorching kick that seems no less deadly. He shrugs, and shoulders the weapon anyway.

If it were possible to saunter while sliding, Money Mo manages it, popping back up to his feet with the kendo stick twirling, giving it a second spin and then unleashing a strike at the apex, onto the downed man's back with a gruesome rattle. Again and again he brings it down, until bloody marks mar Saito's back, and the bamboo begins to split apart.

Laughing, and tossing the weapon aside, Cosmo drags Luke Saito into the center of the ring and covers him with a single foot.

ONE...



TWO...



KICKOUT!

Impossibly, Saito kicks out faster than before, his face still a rictus of pain - but also fierce determination - as he rolls out from under Cosmo's foot. The dangerous rookie scowls, and pursues with a couple of quick steps, unleashing a flurry of kicks that drive his stumbling opponent to his feet and back across the ring. Saito covers and weaves, waiting for the other man's frustration to mount. Suddenly, he's backed into the corner, and as his back hits the turnbuckle, Cosmo smirks coldly, gives him a quick shove to keep him in place, and then launches a beautiful overhead scorpion kick--

--that Saito DIVES UNDER! He lands in a tight roll, grabs a leg on his way up, and sweeps Cosmo Goldworthy out of the corner and onto his back, locking up his legs to an expulsion from the crowd as they recognize the setup for the Joker's STAB IN THE HEART! He brings up his other foot as he falls next to Cosmo, and starts to lock in the hold, the fans anticipating the bridge, ready to reach a crescendo when Cosmo screams, lifts a hand and reaches for Saito's knee, arching his back painfully forward to apply the leverage to roll his opponent onto his side, then extricating his leg to aim a kick at Luke's skull!

Saito eats the kick, but grits his teeth and wriggles away from Cosmo, bloody marks left on the canvas where his lashed back had briefly made contact. Desperately, he reaches out to grasp the kendo stick, and then flows to his feet, launching back toward Goldworthy with the weapon in hand - and a steely look in his eyes.

P-Dug: Gotta admit, this looks bad for Cosmo.

KD: The momentum of this match has shifted, and both men have taken a lot of punishment. It all comes down to this!

Cosmo tries to beg off, but it's too late for that. Saito swings and connects, drawing a cruel line across his opponent's cheek with the split bamboo. Goldworthy is incensed, feeling a cut open on his beloved face, rounding on Saito with a snarl as the kendo stick is drawn back and fired off again!

CRACK! With lightning speed, Cosmo sweeps a leg up in a crescent flash, driving the weapon from Saito's grasp. It bounces off the top rope and spirals out into the crowd, as Saito tries to recover and grab hold of Goldworthy, who flows underneath his arms, and enters a spin on the other side that carries him into his signature tornado kick! READY TO DIE! He gets all of it, at a sickening angle, his foot slamming into the heel of Saito's jaw, tossing him to the canvas. The Joker is seeing little birdies, but Cosmo has no intention of relenting just yet, bending down to turn him around and pick him up, arms hooked...

Spinning his bloodied, dazed opponent into position for the GOLD MINE!!

Luke Saito is drilled into the canvas, bouncing off his face onto his back, limps flopping uselessly as Cosmo glides into the cover, seizing an errant wrist to hold his opponent down as he nods along with Pierce Patterson's count - unerringly confident.

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THREE!!!

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via pinfall ... COSMO GOLDWORTHY!!!!

"THAT'S what I'm talking about!" Cosmo barks as the bell stops ringing, shoving Saito callously down into the mat as he pops to his feet and throws out his arms, turning to soak in the decidedly mixed response from the crowd. Luna Knight looks angry and dejected on the outside, and Luke is slow to stir, as Cosmo heads up onto each turnbuckle and mimes 'making it rain' to each quadrant of the dissenting Rampage fans. He smirks all the harder as their jeers get louder, and takes a moment to slowly gesticulate around his waist, and point assuredly up into the heavens. "All the way," the mics pick up, "All the way, baby."

As he jumps down from the corner, he finds himself face to face with a wobbly, battle-damaged Luke Saito, who is barely on his feet but absolutely determined to approach his opponent one last time... and stick out a hand, meeting his gaze as levelly as he can, nodding in respect and appreciation of a fight that - at least - ended cleanly.

"SHAKE HIS HAND! SHAKE HIS HAND! SHAKE HIS-- BOOOOOO!"

Cosmo isn't here to make friends. He swats the hand aside, and walks straight past Luke Saito, before stopping a couple of feet away. The crowd change gears again, and go to voice their appreciation as he glances over his shoulder and smiles...

And then renew their disgust, because Cosmo Goldworthy whirls around, and drills Saito with a rolling elbow that sends him senseless to the canvas. CASH. ROLLS. EVERYTHING. Luna screams and slides into the ring, and Cosmo just walks past her, casually dropping to the outside before she can decide whether to chase him down or help Luke. The decision is made for her; Cosmo is heading up the ramp, arms outflung and soaking in the hatred of the crowd. And Luna won't abandon her man...

KD: It's hard to argue with his performance in the ring. He employed a few ugly strategies out there, but both men gave and took their share of the punishment - and Cosmo Goldworthy showed us just how good he is, once again. He also showed us what an intolerable, smug, egotistical--

P-Dug: Calm down. This ain't ballet. People get hurt! It's a fight! Fights aren't about shaking hands and making pals, it's about hurting the other guy until they can't move and you're the best, and everyone knows it. Cosmo did what he had to do.

KD: We'll have to agree to disagree, I'm afraid! That was a heinous display by Cosmo. Haven't either of you heard of sportsmanship?

P-Dug: What in the what now? Winning? I've heard of winning. Luke Saito should try it.

KD: Sometimes I'm sorry we're related... oh well. Folks, we've got one mystery match left, and if you've been paying close attention - you already know who to expect. We'll be back in just a few moments.

Camera cuts to ...

We return to ringside tables are being stacked in the ring, and scaffolding has been set up. At the top of the scaffolding, two familiar faces.

KD: Over the break our final two in the mystery pool came out and climbed up the scaffolding for our next match.

P-Dug: I told you Duggan was a psychopath!

Chriqui: The following match is a scaffolding match, to win you must throw your opponent off the scaffolding down through the tables below! Introducing first already on the scaffolding, the winner of 2023 Parabellum... CHRIS PAGE!!!

Chris Page raises up his arms and gets a loud YEAH for some reason, bizarre stuff.

Chriqui: And his opponent also already on the scaffolding... VESPERTINE!!!

Vespertine gives a sickening smile and doesn't move from her place.

KD: What a match to end the mystery portion of the show, Vespertine in her TV proper debut against one of Rampage's top acts.

P-Dug: "One of Rampage's top acts" is underselling it, the guys a future Hall Of Famer!

Chris Page Vs Vespertine - Scaffolding Match

DING DING DING

Chris Page and Vespertine both look down at the eight tables below in the ring. Chris Page looks back up at Vespertine, pops his knuckles and does a little shadow boxing, completely sure of himself. Vespertine just smiles at him. The two advance on each other, Chris Page still in a boxing stance as he throws a few punches into Vespertine's face.  Vespertine answers back with a few low kicks into Page's left leg. Page takes a few steps back and shakes out his leg to limber it up, Vespertine sees her opening and rushes in, dropping to her knees and taking-a-back to grab a waist-lock and rip Page down into a snap German suplex. Chris Page lands hard on the scaffolding but he rolls up to his feet and slugs Vespertine in the jaw hard enough to drop her to a knee. Page then leaps into a shotgun dropkick that sends Vespertine up to her feet, off those feet and backwards three foot on the scaffolding. 

KD: Chris Page and Vespertine in a feeling out process, although any of those moves could be the one to end this one. 

P-Dug: Yea no shit, a German suplex and a dropkick up there?? That's not feeling out Koala, that's trying to end your opponents damn career!

Chris Page advances on Vespertine, he drags her up by her head and gives her a nice slap. Vespertine in return throws herself into a flat-back bump while driving her knees into Chris' chest and flipping him up over her! Chris lands the monkey flip on his feet and looks around shocked, but then gives a 'yea, I meant to do that' face, before turning around and catching a leg lariat right into the mouth that sends him backwards into the siding of the scaffolding. Chris Page spits out a little bit of blood as Vespertine busted his lip. Chris Page adopts his boxing stance again, this time with a smile. He advances and throws a quick combo, Vespertine ducks both blows and chops Page right in his throat. Page falls to a knee, Vespertine gives a smile and goes for a kick, but Page launches himself up, grabs Vespertine round her waist and brings her down hard on the scaffolding with a spinebuster. Page gets into a full mount and starts to punch down. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight punches right into Vespertine's face! Her own lip is bloodied, her eye is already swollen and her face is black and blue, but she again smiles at Page. Page drags her up by her hair and then pulls her into a DDT right on the top of her head. 

P-Dug: Vespertine has gotten under Chris Page's skin, the Parabellum winner seems to have been completely unnerved by her!

KD: Not that Page is well known for keeping a cool head, but still speaks to Vespertine's abilities at mind games. 

Page drags Vespertine up by her hair again, and this time uses a hair-whip toss to send her a few feet on the scaffolding. Vespertine pulls herself up, Chris Page comes up from behind and tries to rip her backwards into a Funky Town, but she spins around and drops into a body press. Vespertine pulls herself up and kicks Chris Page in the face to spin him onto his belly, then she grabs both his ankles and hoists him up and over with a wheelbarrow suplex. Chris hits the scaffolding hard, but he rolls through and rips Vespertine back by her hair and this time gets the Funky Town T-Bone suplex. Page turns around but Vespertine leaps up and catches her knees in his face while pulling him down into them, Epically Diva! Both wrestlers are down. 

KD: Chris Page and Vespertine have beaten the hell out of each other, and one still needs to go down through those damn tables! 

P-Dug: At this point, it's whoever has the most energy to just breathe a strong wind of air at their opponent and get them to drop.

Vespertine and Chris Page both drag themselves up with the aid of the scaffolding walls. They make their way to each other and start trading punches, chops and kicks. Punch from Chris, chop from Vespertine, midsection knee from Chris, punch from Vespertine, chop from Chris, kick from Vespertine, headbutt from Chris, headbutt from Vespertine, headbutt from kick, two punch combo from Vespertine, forearm from Chris, elbow from Vespertine, two punch combo followed up with a chop and a headbutt from Chris, BIG TIME roundhouse kick from Vespertine! Vespertine grabs Chris up into a dragon sleeper, looks down at the tables below and shrugs, fuck it I guess. She lifts Page up and jumps off the scaffolding bringing Chris Page with her through the tables with a giant Breaking the Bank! You broke more than the bank that time kid!

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via throwing her opponent, and herself, through the tables ... VESPERTINE!!!!

Ring crew and medical staff pull both wrestlers from the stacks of tables and debris. Vespertine still wears her smile as she's helped to the back with her hand raised. Chris Page is pleading with the refs that Vespertine hit the tables first as he's helped to the back with a limp. 

KD: Bit of a controversial finish there, but as the record stands. Vespertine has gotten the victory!

P-Dug: But Chris Page might have a point. Between the handicap earlier, the ketchup on Tyler and now this. I think Duggan needs to do the right thing and give all three men a proper payout and steak dinner. 

KD: I want to see you tell that to our brothers face. And that's it folks, we've got one more commercial break and then the rest of the show is commercial free!

Camera cuts to ...

SEMI FINAL
The Core Avengers Vs The House Hunters
Trios Tag
Referee: Toyo Yasahiro

We return to ringside where the ring crew has just cleaned up the broken tables from the previous bout. 

KD: Up next it's our semi-final of the evening, a Trios Tag Tournament first round match-up.

P-Dug: This one is going to be hectic crazy fun I am sure, but can it top the scaffolding match we just saw?

Chriqui: The following match is a Trios Tag Tournament First Round Match-up. Introducing first from The Core Spire... they are the team of Kolby Kreel, Daphne Kreel and Joseph Solomon... THE CORE AVENGERS!!!

Mr. Donaldson steps through the curtain holding a button inside his hand. He stands at the top of the ramp while holding said button in the palm of his right hand. He looks around the arena before pressing the button. The lights drop down as a D20 rolls across the X-Tron. Mr. Donaldson presses the button again as “It’s Thursday Night” begins playing over the sound system. Three spotlights shine on the stage as Kolby, Daphne and Joseph are standing inside each spotlight. The crowd is loudly giving their displeasure as Mr. Donaldson leads the trio down the ramp. They stop midway down as he presses the button again and sparks fly from behind them. Joseph walks around the right side of the ring, Daphne walks around the left as Kolby walks toward the center. They each nod their head before climbing up onto the ring apron. Joseph and Daphne both leap over the ropes as Kolby steps over the top rope. Daphne hops up onto one turnbuckle, Kolby climbs onto another and Joseph steps onto the ring ropes as Mr. Donaldson is standing on the outside with a grin on his face.

KD: The Core Avengers, I think this team may be the underdogs to win this whole tournament. 

P-Dug: They definitely have the spirit to pull it off. But gonna need them to roll a 1d20+5 to see if they hit. 

Chriqui: And their opponent, the trio who will oust The House... They are the team of Hiroyoshi Fujinami, Captain EWC and Jon Snow ... THE HOUSE HUNTERS!!!

OUR HOUSE... IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR STREET

Hiroyoshi Fujinami comes sprinting out from the back.

Fujinami: FUCK THE HOUSE! FUCK THE HOUSE!

Hiroyoshi heads to the ring, trying to get the crowd in on his chant. When he gets to the ring, he loses his footing and falls into the ring-steps, faceplanting into the apron. Hiroyoshi grabs the ring-apron and pulls himself under the bottom rope into the ring. He rolls onto his back and attempts a kip-up, but overshoots and lands face first in the middle of the ring. He rolls back onto his back and lets out one more defiant cry of...

Fujinami: FUCK THE MOTHERFUCKING HOUSE!!!!

Some sparklers will spark on the ring-posts. Captain EWC comes crawling out from under the ring. He smashes a light-tube against his head and then he rolls in and lays next to Hiroyoshi. Jon Snow comes riding a motorcycle down the ramp, a vehicle that will only ever be seen for these trios entrances. Probably because he doesn't actually know how to drive the damn thing but thought it looked cool.

KD: Damn that motorcycle looks cool. 

P-Dug: You mark, he's about to crash it into the damn crowd. 

DING DING DING

Daphne Kreel starts this one for Core Avengers, while Captain EWC starts it for House Hunters. Captain EWC raises up his hands for a shoulder/collar tie-up, but instead Daphne kicks him in his left leg and then punches him in the mouth. Captain EWC responds by yelling out in betrayal and throwing himself into Daphne with all his weight for a shoulder thrust. Captain EWC pulls himself up and wipes tears from his eyes before tagging out to Jon Snow, and then sitting on the apron to cry while Hiroyoshi comforts him. Daphne gets to her feet and looks very confused. Her attention is brought back to Jon Show when he sends a kick into her leg just like she did Captain EWC. Daphne kicks Jon, Jon kicks Daphne, Daphne kicks Jon, Jon kicks Daphne. Seeing this is going nowhere, Daphne tags out to Kolby Kreel. When Kolby enters, Jon punches him in the mouth and grabs on a headlock, dragging Kolby into the center of the ring and dropping him to his stomach. Jon wrenches back on the hold and tries to squeeze the life juice from Kolby's head. Kolby fights through and gets to his feet, before dragging Jon up and over into a 'dangerous' style backdrop suplex, landing him right on his head. Kolby tags out to Daphne and then stomps down on Jon's chest, Daphne tags out to Joseph and stomps down on Jon's chest, then lastly Joseph stomps down on Jon's chest. 

KD: They are stomping a mud hole into Jon Snow's chest. 

P-Dug: And have you ever seen muddy snow? That is GROSS. 

Joseph Solomon drags Jon Snow up to his feet, sends a chop into his chest and then grabs on a headlock. Joseph takes a few steps forward and slams the top of Jon's head right into the center of the ring with a headlock driver, The Crown Of Thornes! Joseph goes for a cover. 

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
... KICKOUT BY JON SNOW

As he kicks out Jon yells to his corner 'A little fucking help guys', but his team ignores him as Hiroyoshi and Captain EWC play some Rock-Paper-Scissors to make Captain EWC feel better. Daphne Kreel comes in the ring and stomps down into Jon's mouth, I guess that means shut up. Daphne and Joseph send Jon into the ropes, and on the rebound floor him with stereo dropkicks. Joseph climbs up the top turnbuckle, and then moonsaults down into Jon Snow. Cover!

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THR... KICKOUT BY JON SNOW

'No seriously, some fucking HELP', this time Hiroyoshi and Captain EWC are playing Tic-tac-toe, and this time it is Kolby who stomps down into Jon's mouth.

P-Dug: Jon Snow is having himself a rough go out there, but Tic-tac-toe is pretty damn important. 

KD: I hope they don't have a deck of Uno cards under the ring, this match will never end. 

Joseph Solomon drags Jon Snow up, sending him into the ropes with an Irish-whip, on the rebound Jon Snow eats a drop-toe hold from Joe, an elbow drop from Kolby and a leg drop from Daphne. Joseph tags out to Kolby. Kolby and Daphne send Jon into the ropes, looking for a double team maneuver, but Jon comes flying in and turns both inside out with a double lariat! Joseph enters the ring and rushes Jon, but Jon spartan kicks him hard enough to send him backwards, nuts first, into the ring-post. Jon winches and apologizes and then rushes his own corner to dropkick Captain EWC off the apron. Then Jon makes the tag to Hiroyoshi, by slapping in the back of the head. Hiroyoshi looks confused at Jon's anger, hands him the Tic-tac-toe book, and enters the ring. Kolby rushes to his feet and charges Hiroyoshi, but Hiroyoshi chops him in the throat with his forearm. Kolby stumbles back and chokes for air. Hiroyoshi jumps forward onto Kolby's back and then flips around into a powerbomb, Rolling Yoshi Tonic! Cover!

O... BROKEN UP BY DAPHNE KREEL

Daphne sends another kick into Hiroyoshi's mouth, before dragging him up into an Irish-whip, on the rebound Hiroyoshi ducks a punch, grabs on a waist-lock and rips Daphne backwards into a snap German. As Hiroyoshi gets to his feet, Kolby comes flying into him with a discus clothesline, DM Says No! Cover!

O... BROKEN UP BY CAPTAIN EWC JUMPING OFF THE TOP ROPE WITH A DIVING HEADBUTT. 

Captain EWC gets to his feet and yells out in triumph. Joseph Solomon comes in from the side and floors him with a superkick! Jon Snow tries to enter the ring, and eats a superkick himself! Hiroyoshi gets to his feet, a superkick for him too! The impact sends Hiroyoshi backwards into the ropes, and on the rebound another superkick! This impact sends Hiroyoshi into a backflip and he lands on his knees. Joseph comes in and ANOTHER superkick to the kneeling Hiroyoshi! That impact send Hiroyoshi to the canvas, rolling out to of the ring and landing on the padded concrete. 

KD: Superkick Party from Joseph Solomon, I think I counted five superkicks in thirty seconds? Gotta be close to a record. 

P-Dug: Killing the biz kid, killing the biz. 

Joseph Solomon turns around to help his teammates to their feet, but he turns right into a Spanish Fly from Captain EWC! Captain EWC drags Joseph up by his head, puts his head between his legs and then flips forward into a JoJo Rush Destroyer! Captain EWC gets to his feet and yells out, but then the impact from the superkick reverberates back through his skull as he falls flat. Kolby Kreel gets to his feet, and looks at the carnage of bodies, seeing Hiroyoshi isn't in the ring he heads out to get him. Kolby drags Hiroyoshi up, gives him a good booting to the face, and rolls him into the ring. Kolby goes for the cover!

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THREE... HIROYOSHI GETS HIS FOOT ON THE BOTTOM ROPE!!!

Kolby Kreel cannot believe it, Hiroyoshi just barely getting his foot on the bottom rope at 2.99. Kolby drags Hiroyoshi up and floors him with a swinging neckbreaker. Kolby tags out to Daphne who rushes into the ring and catches Captain EWC with a Shining Wizard as he attempts to stand. Daphne grabs Hiroyoshi up into a sleeper hold, and then she pulls that up going for a Dragon Suplex, midair Hiroyoshi spins around and catches Daphne in a headlock, followed by a vertical lift and a brainbuster suplex. Kolby jumps into the ring, but Jon Snow floors him with a lariat that sends him back over the ropes to the outside. Jon Snow turns around and eats a superkick from Joseph that too sends him over the same top rope to the outside. Joseph turns around and eats a... oh wait Captain EWC is playing Tic-tac-toe against himself in the opposite corner. Joseph advances on Hiroyoshi and gets him with a triple German suplex. Joseph gets Daphne to the corner and gets the tag. Joseph goes for the cover on Hiroyoshi. 

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THR... BROKEN UP BY CAPTAIN EWC.

I guess technically, you see Captain EWC somehow lost to himself in solo Tic-Tac-Toe, and so he threw the notepad in anger, and that broke up the pin. The ref scolds Captain EWC about a DQ, but Captain EWC honestly didn't mean anything by it so it's let go. Joseph however has a papercut on his forehead, and he shoves Captain EWC and tells him to get out of his ring. Captain EWC begins to cry and then he stomps down on Joseph's toe before leaving the ring. Damnit man, he is sensitive. 

P-Dug: Captain EWC has a heart of pure gold, and fire, and explosives. 

KD: People really need to be nicer to him!

Joseph Solomon limps backwards holding his hurt, and possible broken toe'd, foot. On the outside, Jon Snow just floored both Kruel Masters with a lariat! Joseph Solomon turns around and eats a big boot to this face, sending him backwards into the ropes. Hiroyoshi flashes his elbow to the camera, revealing an EWC tattoo. He brings the elbow crashing down on Joseph's head. Joseph stumbles but does not fall. Hiroyoshi hits the elbow once more, then again, and then again, finally Joseph Solomon falls to the canvas, and Hiroyoshi falls over him with a deadweight cover.  

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THREE!!!

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via pinfall ... THE HOUSE HUNTERS!!!

Captain EWC rolls into the ring and picks up the tic-tac-toe notebook, oh wow he won after all. He jumps up for joy! Jon Snow rolls into the ring and floors him with a lariat and then he tears up the book. Both men oblivious to to Core Avengers teeing off on Hiroyoshi post match with some more mud-hole stomps. Core Avengers head to the back, leaving Hiroyoshi a bloody bruised mess. Property Brothers finally notice Hiroyoshi and haphazardly carry him off to the back. 

KD: A big win for House Hunters as they advance in the tournament, but I think they sure took a lot of damage in this one!

P-Dug: I have a feeling whoever they face next will hammer home hard maybe these guys don't work that well together after all...

KD: And speaking of teams who may not work well after all, it's time for our main event!

MAIN EVENT
Moxie & Kisikil Vs The Mercenary & Vin Havoc
No DQ - Tag Team
Referee: Toyo Yasahiro

We cut back to the ring from the commentary booth where four thousand people are making as much noise as they're humanly able to. Rampage is running as hot as it ever has, and Dimitris is baying for blood and chaos as we finally reach the main event.

KD: Well, we've run out of mystery matches, but perhaps not out of mystery itself, and we may be about to run out of sanity here tonight! Where do we begin? Back at the Invasion Series in Ohio, former US Champion and beloved f--

P-Dug: Flash in the pan!

KD: --... Darna Dare, appeared unannounced for a grudge match with the X-Division champion, JoJo Rush, and she--

P-Dug: FUCKING EXPLODED!

KD: Er, yes. From the ruin of body parts and in complete frivolous contempt of the lawsuits our legal team has been fending off in the subsequent weeks, crawled a... woman? A 'woman' we've come to know as 'Kisikil'. I can confirm that yes, she is a Rampage superstar, and she requested this matchup tonight for reasons that remain something of a mystery. And what a match it is! Our joint and reigning United States champions are going back-to-back for this one, and blow-for-blow with not just this demonic woman-thing, but the former HBO Champion and arguable rookie standout of the past few years, Moxie!

P-Dug: Everybody's seen the card, bro.

KD: You're right, but... the ramifications! The storylines! The intrigue running through this matchup!

P-Dug: Fuck all of that! The blood, the violence, the pain! This. Is. Rampage! And this is our main event!!

Chriqui: The following match is for one fall, with NO DISQUALIFICATIONS. Introducing first, from the Other Side of the Mirror, weighing in at one hundred and forty pounds... KISIKIL!!!

Sickly red smoke floods the entryway as the intro of "House of Mirrors" builds to a screaming crescendo. The small, fiercely-dedicated crowd is all too ready to pour their disgust on the entity that bursts onto the stage with a forbidding rattle of chains, her compact, powerful frame wrapped in thick, steel links that hang in twin bunches from her arms. Kisikil is a frantic blur of color within the roiling crimson fog, her painted face blazing with a malicious, spirited grin, hazel eyes smoldering in the reflected light. She lunges this way and that, chains rattling, before exploding into a demonstrative flurry of kicks - a mocking, searing echo of the combination she used to dismissively level JoJo Rush.

Rather than finish with a mule kick, she spins into a high-arching axe kick that sees her sweep the other leg and land in the splits upon the top of the ramp, lashing her tongue at the crowd then tumbling forward into a roll that becomes a dash toward the ring. Dragging her entwining chains behind her, she does a lap of the entire ring, smacking each ring post before she dives in under the bottom rope, rising sinuously to her feet and lunging animalistically into the middle of the ring.

KD: Hate her, hate her, or be strangely attracted to her but still, probably hate her, you have to admit she has a flair for the theatrical. I'm grudgingly curious to see what 'Kisikil' really brings to the ring.

P-Dug: I'm gonna go out on a limb here, and say Kisikil has a flair for more than just theatrics. Darna Dare sucked and then fizzled out, why do we give a fuck about anything but this actual goddess in front of us? This is gonna be awesome.

Chriqui: And her partner, from London, England, weighing in at two hundred and two pounds... MOXIE!!!

The Gracious Few's 'Honest Man' hits the speakers, prompting the lights to dance around the arena with an ominous red glow. Moxie emerges from behind the curtain, with a notable absence of Amis Shelton behind him. He marches to the end of the stage and glares at the capacity crowd surrounding him. Raising his fist to his jaw, Moxie lets out a roar and walks down the aisle, ignoring the paying spectators as he briefly matches eyes with his wildly-capering tag partner.

He slides underneath the bottom rope and rises to his feet in the middle of the ring. Moxie faces the crowd before snapping back to face the camera, emphatically raising both clenched fists high above his head before slowly descending them in stereo to both sides of his jaw. From their corner, Kisikil grins like the cat who got the cream.

KD: He needs no introduction, but we're going to give him one. Moxie has been a force ever since his arrival to this company just a couple of years ago - his list of wins reads like a 'Who's Who?' of EWC. Not many can say they have clean victories over both Melody Malone and Ace King. Small wonder anybody would choose Moxie for a tag partner.

P-Dug: Anybody smart, yeah. Look, he may have missed a step in the B.O.R.T. but these two said it themselves; Moxie doesn't fail twice. He's here to fuck shit up and wreak limb-shattering vengeance on anyone who tries to stop him.

KD: You know, you're definitely getting more eloquent...

Chriqui: And now, coming to the ring from Rockaway Beach in Queens, New York... Weighing in at a combined weight of... ahem... um... none of your fucking business... They are The Best of Rampage and your EWC United States Champion:

The "Gunslinger" VIN HAVOC and The "EWC Outlaw" THE MERCENARY!

Never Say Die by Jon Bon Jovi from The Young Guns 2 Soundtrack starts to play loudly over the public address.

As we stood there older than the men

And younger than them boys (that's right)

We were as still as the wind

That blows on a hot August night

Both men come out of the back together, Vin on the left and Mercenary on the right. They are both wearing western style dusters with writing embroidered across the back.  Vin's is brown and reads: Gunslinger.  Merc's is black and reads: Outlaw.

And you were lonesome as a jukebox

But deadly just the same

I could be as gentle as a newborn

Then spit into the eye of a hurricane

Both men hold up their half of "The U.S. Title" with their outside hand to salute the crowd as pyro explodes to either side of them.

And we knew how to laugh
And we knew how to cry
Yeah, we sure knew how to live
But we don't ever

Never say die!

With a fist bump they march in stride, side by side, down to ringside.  Merc remaining stoic and focused, while Vin talks trash with every step.

They ask what it is that I want written
On the gravestone where I lie
Tell them it's just my bones that died there
So save the tears they'll cry

Cause my spirit is still riding somewhere's in this night
And it's these three words that come to me
As I kiss this world good bye

Never say die, never say no

You got to look 'em in the eye and don't let go

When it's your own blood you bleed

And your own tears you cry

When you're brought up to believe

That it's the strong who survive

Never say die!

Each man picks a set of steps, shedding their dusters they both enter the ring at the same time, never taking their eyes off of their opponents. Vin stares daggers at The Demon Kisikil while Mercenary has Moxie firmly in his sights.

KD: What an entrance; I've got goosebumps! These are our champions, and we couldn't be prouder of either of them. The path these men have placed through Friday Night Rampage this year is... legendary, and to see them line up on the same page is a treat.

P-Dug: Yeah, alright, it's pretty good. These are two bad motherfuckers, and if you do the math, you'll find bad motherfucker plus bad motherfucker equals... like, a REALLY bad motherfucker. I'm not even gonna insult these dudes. Let's go already!

DING DING DING

Both teams pass a glance between them as Toyo Yasahiro signals for the match to begin, and both reach the same conclusion; if we can't be disqualified, we don't need to TAG. Merc and Vin give each other a respectful nod and a fist-bump, starting forward-- into the onrushing hordes of hell. It's genuinely uncanny how similarly Moxie and the chain-wrapped Kisikil move in this moment, going from zero to a hundred; and better, flawlessly exchanging their apparently destined opponents for this match. The demoness darts past the British bruiser, approaching at an arc the tall, powerful figure of the Mercenary, while Moxie makes a beeline straight for the blood and guts brutality known as Vin Havoc. They strike simultaneously...

CRUNCH! Kisikil leaps and extends a leg, introducing the Mercenary to a move he's eaten one too many times in the past - Darna Dare's Kalabaw Hunting Horn, her knee driving the big man onto his back! WHAM! In the same instant, Moxie drills a forearm into the Wild Thing, ducks a return shot and delivers a second blow in the form of a punishing superkick to the jaw. The odd couple exchange a sidelong smirk, and swap opponents, Moxie dropping to the mat to engage Merc where he has a pronounced advantage, and Lili flying quite literally headlong into Havoc, who's tied up in the ropes following Moxie's assault.

A flurry of strikes berates Vin for the audacity to even accept this match, his demonic opponent cackling away to herself as she spits a torrent of hissed insults, closing out a furious combination with a simple, emphatic slap across the face, before flipping clean over into a Dragon Sleeper, dragging the back of his head down against the top rope as she grinds in the hold. Moxie's game plan is rather more technical and precise, threatening a kimura to keep the Mercenary grounded, using this leverage to twist him into a pretzel, plant a knee on the side of his head, and begin judiciously working at the fine-boned joints in his wrist and fingers. The grunts and pained growls of both men flood ringside, until they're drowned out by a torrent of boos, as Moxie and his unlikely partner slow the pace the fuck down in the early innings.

Toyo Yasahiro darts between both sets of combatants, having immediately given up on maintaining any kind of order with regard to the legal man, woman, or thing. He checks for the submission, and the restless crowd rally behind each champion in turn, their pleas joining force with the sheer grit of both men to bring them fighting back from this early disadvantage. The Mercenary risks dislocating his shoulder as he cries out in rage, and twists against Moxie's cruel ministrations, using his sheer power to force the Brit off-balance, drive through the blaze of pain, and find an angle to thrust a hand up into his throat. Over by the ropes, Havoc kicks his feet up to his chest, similarly submitting to the hold he's caught in, only to stun the crowd by flipping up and over Kisikil, forcing the pressure to release, and then splitting his legs to bring her crashing (and rattling, courtesy of those trailing chains) against the apron, and subsequently into the floor, with a beautifully improvised sit-out counter!

Vin eats shit himself a moment later, and starts to crawl slowly upright to an absolute outrage of passion from the crowd, who keep it going for the Mercenary, as he fights his way into a mount on Moxie and begins raining down clubbing blows, mauling the younger, smaller man!

KD: Havoc's free, and the Mercenary seems to now be dominating his own half of this battle! The determination of these men, to overcome the ferocity and technical acumen of their opponents, is astounding to behold. This is what champions look like.

P-Dug: Yeah, but we're mere minutes into this match, and that crazy bitch hasn't used those chains yet...

Kisikil thrashes her way to her feet abruptly, inhumanly untangling her own bodily mess to end up not only vertical, but lashing out with those very chains before Vin Havoc can recover his own footing. Her bloodshot eyes marking her target, she flings her arms out, bringing the trailing chains into heavy, whipping contact with bare flesh. The Wild Thing is forced to his knees, fingers crooked and muscles rippling as pain contorts his body, giving the demoness the opening to step in and wrap the metal links around his throat, choking him out in front of the apoplectic fans at ringside.

Inside the ring, the Mercenary has to roll clear of Moxie, leaving the battered Brit to regain his senses as he recovers his own tired arms, shaking out his wrists and popping his knuckles after delivering a swift and brutal beatdown. Blood seeps from his knuckles, and his joints are visibly inflamed, the manipulation of his prodigious foe having taken its toll. Moxie spits out a mouthful of blood-soaked phlegm, and wriggles back into the corner, running a hand back across his mouth as he pulls himself upright with the other arm. The Mercenary stalks toward him somewhat cautiously, but he's distracted by the choking noises from ringside, and Moxie seizes the upper hand, darting out of the corner to slam a nasty kick into the big man's thigh.

Merc's knee gives slightly, and Moxie bites down on the weakness, hooking the afflicted leg and bringing his arm into play above, dropping the behemoth with a rapid reverse Russian legsweep, introducing him facefirst to the turnbuckle! The US Champ rebounds, shakes off the cobwebs, and turns into a chop to the chest, staggering Moxie in turn. His leg still seems twisted, but in spite of it Merc is able to step in, grab a front facelock, and like-for-like his foe; dropping HIM into the turnbuckle with a PUNISHER SUPLEX! Moxie's folded in half, and with veteran savvy the Mercenary capitalizes fully, following up by planting a big boot against his face and stomping his way past Moxie's chin into his throat, holding onto the ropes for extra leverage!

Outside the ring, Kisikil gets bored of just choking out the man who won't quit, and steps back, still half-attached to him by her own chains, stepping into a scissor knee to the side of his skull, then switching her stance to fire off a snapping roundhouse kick to the other side. Vin starts to slump forward, and she leaps onto his back, driving him to the floor with her weight across his shoulders, hooking him into a camel clutch and swiftly introducing her long-nailed fingers into the outer edges of his mouth, fish-hooking him for good measure! A rain of trash and half-filled drink cups shower down on her, soaking Vin too as the crowd communicate their disdain.

P-Dug: They may not like it but this is smart as hell. I don't care who you are, Havoc hits like a freakin' truck, and keeping him grounded and ineffective, wearing him down, is just sound strategy, right?

KD: You're absolutely right! While Moxie and the Mercenary trade barbarisms, Kisikil seems to be mostly maintaining the upper hand on her own, uh, prey. Let's not count out just how tough Vin Havoc is, though.

Moxie is coughing up blood as he fights his way out of the corner, managing to get a hand on the ropes and pull himself up as his massive opponent continues to rain down increasingly tired stomps. Finally, the Brit breaks through the storm, seizing a particularly weakened strike, and driving Merc back against the ropes, using the momentum - and a roar of pure, unrestrained effort and fury - to spin the big man toward the center of the ring and HOIST HIM UP INTO THE AIR! On mere principle, the crowd explode with appreciation at this feat, briefly forgetting how much they hate what's happening on the outside as Mox flattens the EWC Outlaw with a sit-out powerbomb! He struggles to hold on, bending forward, already soaked in sweat, to try and keep the huge man down for the count of three!

ONE...



TWO...



KICKOUT!

Forgetting Moxie's impressive feat, the arena is back with the US Champs, as Merc throws his weight against Moxie and straddles him, hooking the head and hauling him straight up into position for a vertical brainbuster that shakes the whole ring! Gasping for air, he floats over, but Yasahiro can barely strike the one before Moxie angrily kicks out, then sprawls toward the opposite corner, starting to claw his way desperately across the ring. Neither man is in good shape, as on the outside Vin Havoc momentarily goes limp in Kisikil's clutches, and the demoness sneers in disdain - apparently disappointed with how well she's doing. She lets Havoc fall, and stands up in a din of rattling chain, unwinding herself from the fallen man.

Moxie and Mercenary pull themselves upright in opposite corners, staring one another down as Kisikil comes clattering up onto the apron, barking an order at Moxie, who quirks an eyebrow as if to say, 'really?' Her eyes widen, but what seems a burst of anger turns to a grin, and she ducks through the ropes, extending a hand toward the Brit. He clasps the offered arm, and lets her yank him from the corner, grounding hard to then whip her in turn toward the Mercenary!

The big man counters with a back body drop, but Lili twists in the air and catches herself on the top rope, balancing catlike for a moment before erupting into a springboard missile dropkick, just as Moxie comes in from the other side, ready to catch the staggered Mercenary with a vicious snap German! Rather than bridge, he releases and slides to his feet, watching the grizzled vet force himself upright, and ready to pounce in with Kisikil, hitting a pair of roundhouse kicks - one low, one high, then each spinning into a sole butt that doubles Merc over. Both taking a side, they whip him into the corner--

--but he puts on the brakes! They're already rushing in to follow up, but with the smooth unflappability of a glacier he turns around with deceptive speed, and throws out his arms, catching BOTH of them around the throat!

The Mercenary takes a loping step out of the corner, hefting both opponents off the ground and sitting out into a DOUBLE DEATH STROKE! The mat detonates like it's been hit by a thunderbolt, the ring shuddering precariously at their conjoined impact, Kisikil's chains coming loose in a puddle around her as she's finally laid out inside the ring. Moxie tries to stand on instinct, but falls onto all fours, his head spinning. Merc starts to cover, but then sees Vin Havoc on the outside, and abandons his solo affair to rejoin his tag partner, the two taking a moment to converse on the outside as the crowd continues to go wild for the Mercenary's dramatic comeback.

KD: These are some hard, hard hitters competing for nothing more than bragging rights. Every blow is devastating, every hold could end this match in an instant. This all comes down to grit; pure willpower!

P-Dug: I think it comes down to who's the fucking craziest. You don't beat any of these four with just a few moves - you beat them by going further than they're willing to, pushing way past the human limit. Somebody's gotta get BROKEN, plain and simple.

The ring's actually teetering a little, as Merc and Vin re-enter in parallel corners, the Mercenary looking laser-focused and Havoc just looking fucking. pissed. He's got a similar intensity to Moxie, as he passes straight by the Brit, who's barely onto one knee and starting to rise, making a beeline for Kisikil, who's dripping with metal links that Havoc seizes in two handfuls and HAULS on, dragging her onto her back with a growl of anger. Turning, he bundles the chain around both fists and takes a page from Merc's playbook, simply raining bombs down on the painted woman, who's giggling at first, but soon has the sass and air beaten from her, her face split open and dribbling blood through the paint.

Mercenary meanwhile closes in on Moxie once again, throwing strong hands that the cunning Brit blocks by covering up and using his elbows to deflect, further punishing the fingers he targeted earlier. Merc is losing the war of attrition, but he's been around the block more than a few times - he knows when to change tactics, and so he does, briefly feigning a pained stumble away, and when Moxie rages forward, leaving his feet to hit a rare, but astoundingly explosive single-leg dropkick! It's a sight to see the big man move like that, and the crowd are losing their minds mutually for him and Vin. Moxie hits the deck, only to be pulled straight up into a clinch, eating a few knees to the midsection--

--before he gets a foot up onto the middle rope, and pushes against this fulcrum point, launching a counter knee of his own that drills the big man hard in the kidney! The Mercenary wobbles immediately, Yasahiro actually moving in to check on him - rather than the thoroughly bloodied demoness - but before any checks can be made, Moxie follows up with a beautiful Michinoku Driver, going for the cover!

ONE...



TWO...



NO!!

It might have been a three, it's painfully close, but Vin Havoc has the ring awareness and the weather eye out for his partner, diving from on top of Kisikil in a clamor of the chains binding them together, actually dragging the demoness along a few feet as he flings his arm out to break the count. Moxie is incensed, snarling, gaze flicking with irritation to his partner en route to Havoc. He rattles Vin with a couple of forearms, both men on their feet with the impacts, then lays in a skin-flaying chop for good measure. Havoc demands more, beckoning him on, and the Brit spins into a full-force roundhouse, swinging his foot like a morningstar. The Wild Thing eats it for breakfast, taking it full on the side with a grunt, but holding on, looping some of Kisikil's chain around the limb as he falls backwards, harshly snapping the captured leg.

Moxie rolls forward, ending up on one knee, the damaged limb trailing, coming face-to-roaring face with Vin, who SLAMS him with a headbutt, then drags the other man to his feet and follows up with a crunching Saito suplex, floating over for the cover!

ONE...



NO!!!

Kisikil makes the save this time, hurling herself across the canvas into a brusque face wash, her boot drilling into Vin's cheek and sending him flopping off of Moxie. She glances over her shoulder at the Mercenary, who's halfway to his feet, and shrugs the remaining mass of chain from her body, dropping it across Havoc as she takes off toward the EWC Outlaw. He tries to intercept the screaming demoness with a big boot, but she bridges underneath it, then spins wildly into a legsweep! Mercenary catches himself on all fours, stumbling forward to regain his footing-- and Kisikil is right there behind him, seizing a hold and spinning her vastly larger foe around toward her, dropping into a forward somersault Koppou kick to send him right back to the floor! TASTE THE WHIP!

Kipping up, she's wearing a wide grin, lips streaked in running paint and dripping blood, pausing only an instant to stare at the crowd before she explodes into a standing moonsault, abandoning the cover to instead lunge toward Vin Havoc...

He's just gotten back to his feet, when Kisikil grabs HIM from behind, attempting to work in a Full Nelson only to eat a sharp mule kick to the crotch that sends her stumbling. Havoc turns, flips her off, then surges into a violent lariat, drilling her sharply into the canvas! She collapses amidst her abandoned chains, and he bends down to loop a coil around her neck and haul her upright, the metal links tightening enough to get a wheezing choke from the crazed demoness. Hooking an arm around her strained throat, he gives a sharp battle cry as he piles pain upon pain, dropping Lili with a WTR! WILD THING REVOLUTION!

She arches her spine with the impact, and Vin pauses to lick his lips, beating on the side of his own head as the adrenaline pounds through his veins. Unfortunately, he's not the only man up - and Moxie interjects himself, rattling Havoc's jaw with a European uppercut, baiting him into a brief striking battle before smoothly countering into a cross armbreaker, his boots kicking out across Vin's ravaged throat as he strains at the arm. Toyo Yasahiro looks for the submission, the crowd rallying behind the US Champs as Mercenary clambers to his feet and moves to intervene. He gets there fast enough to break it up, dropping a guillotining leg across Moxie's own throat, then pulling the other man to his feet. Vin writhes in pain, which is redoubled as Kisikil stomps his stricken limb in passing, then uses her own partner as a climbing frame, leap-frogging up and over--

--into a wild crossbody that carries her straight through Mercenary, tumbling off of him to land in a three-point crouch on the other side, keen hazel eyes marking her target as he tries to flow to his feet. Moxie moves forward, but Lili has it covered, darting to intercept the Outlaw, sliding in the Full Nelson she failed to capture Vin with previously. It's another surreal moment for the crowd, who are emphatically against this seemingly murderous nutjob, but also-- she rears back with a man twice her size, and flips him inside out with a soul-crushing snap dragon suplex! BLACK MIRROR SHOT!

Merc erupts face-first off he canvas, collapsing in a massive heap as Kisikil flows upright, storming over to the ropes and leaning across them, tongue lashing at the crowd who are just REACTING to this audacious display. She's panting, sweating, bleeding, but she's a lascivious goddess of war as she stands there, soaking in the jeers.

P-Dug: That was uh, something. Can she... can she do that?

KD: She just did do that. Whatever wild claims she's made, may be true. This isn't an ordinary woman - even by the standards of the competitors inside that ring. Of course, Vin Havoc's no ordinary man either!!

The exclamation comes as Vin stumbles toward Moxie, clutching his arm and heaving for breath himself, only to weave around the Brit's attempted interception. He lashes out with a kick to the midsection, and gasps as he steps in, pushing past all the pain to heave the former HBO Champ into a vertical suplex. He holds on, spinning back to his feet with Moxie still in tow, just as Kisikil turns around. Vin locks eyes with her - and if a stare could flip someone off and tell them to fuck their own mother, this one does. Switching grip on the prodigious grappler, he scoops Moxie up and lands a potent EMERALD FLOWSION, planting him into the mat. The cover seems academic, and Havoc almost goes for it instinctively, but his remaining opponent starts forward and he releases, sliding to his own feet, beckoning her on from a wide stance, driving a mocking blow to his own jaw.

She offers a reptilian smile, glances at the stirring form of the Mercenary, and decides to nope out. Throwing up her arms, she walks backwards, falls against the top rope and flips backwards to the floor... where from Havoc's view, she appears to vanish, disappearing beneath the ring. "FUCK." Vin loudly curses, beating at his own forehead in frustration, then moves to help up his partner. Both of them gather up Moxie, working the Brit over with a few strikes, depositing him in the powerful clutches of the Mercenary, who bends him over into a gutwrench, head between his legs. From there it's a heave into a Gotch-style piledriver, as with a bellow of effort, Vin Havoc comes flying off the middle rope, adding his own leverage to an assisted SUZUKI SPIKE!!

Moxie's drilled into the canvas, and hits the mat like a sack of potatoes thereafter. Vin nods at his partner, separating to pursue the vanished Kisikil while Mercenary makes the cover. Yasahiro is already in place to apply the count.


ONE...



TWO...



THR-- KICKOUT!!

The crowd lose their fucking minds, as Moxie hurls his shoulder up at 2.999, receiving no help and seemingly needing none, squirming away from the big man, who's wide-eyed and shocked at not just the kickout, but its timing and power. Moxie doesn't have an ounce of quit in him, thrashing his way to the corner and jolting himself upright, leaning there drenched in sweat, staring down the Mercenary with rapid shakes of his head. No, no, no. Merc shakes off the astonishment and nods in return, breathing a sigh as he starts to clamber to his feet. The crowd rally behind the US Champ, as the two rivals close in one another.

On the outside, Havoc is whipping up the apron and checking for Kisikil, who bursts impishly from the opposite side, dragging with her a spool of electrical cable, which she's GNAWING at with her teeth, stripping chunks of material and spitting them out as the sounds of strikes being exchanged emanates from inside the ring. She's a distracting sight, but not enough to wholly mitigate the back-and-forth cries that go up as Moxie and the Mercenary work each other with a delightfully oldschool strike battle. Meaty smacks and sharp cracks fill the arena, and Vin Havoc almost looks a little jealous-- but he remains intent on the demoness. She leads him on a merry dance around the ring, before pausing at the timekeeper's table, spitting out a mouthful of shielding rubber and then seizing the ring bell despite the protests of the official. It gives a few dull clunks, as she scampers off, twining it in stripped wires, pursued by a bear in the form of the Wild Thing.

Inside the ring, Moxie has fallen to one knee after a potent roaring elbow from the EWC Outlaw, who seizes him by the head and prepares to - perhaps - finish him off, bringing him up to his feet-- or trying to. Moxie's halfway up when he suddenly brings an arm up, between the legs, drilling the big man with a low blow. Merc doubles over, and Moxie reaches into his tights, scrabbling swiftly to slip on a pair of brass knuckles, that he carries upward into a jarring uppercut to the jaw! The Mercenary stumbles, and starts to fall, but Moxie's got more in mind - he's got to make a statement. He surges beneath the big man, heaving him up into the air to deliver a promise - and a long-overdue receipt, in the form of MOXIE'S ENDGAME!

The reverse STO plants the Mercenary, twice-heeled on, perhaps thrice-senseless, and Moxie hooks a leg for good measure, grinding a forearm across his opponent's face as he snarls across at Toyo Yasahiro, diligent with the count as always.

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.

DING

Confusion.

Yasahiro looks around, jarred from his count by the sound of the ring bell.

He didn't call for it - but Kisikil did, whirling the bell at the end of her stripped electrical cable, bringing it around like a meteor hammer to crack Vin Havoc across the jaw, splitting open a wide gash with a gout of blood and a loose flap of flayed flesh. The Wild Thing crashes across the barricade, and the demoness dances forward with delight, dragging the bell back toward her and sounding off a duller DONK as she kicks it up into the air, and then snaps it down into Vin's temple, cutting him open a second time! She's BRAYING with laughter, but Moxie roars in frustration, as the moment of victory is snatched away.

He strides toward Yasahiro, spinning him around and demanding he make the bloody count, before moving to re-cover the Mercenary... who scores with a quick roll-up, barely able to keep Moxie down but throwing his every last thing into it anyway!

ONE...



TWO...



KICKOUT!

The Brit rolls back to his feet, grinds a fist against his jaw, and surges forward, all too hastily -- walking right into a desperate boot to the gut, and a Jackknife powerbomb that gets a massive pop from the crowd, who are momentarily distracted from the action on the outside, where Lili has once again wrapped a coil of metal around the throat of Vin Havoc. They're both soaked in blood, hers half-dried, his seeping freely, as she starts dragging him toward the ring. The Mercenary is exhausted, and despite his empthatic counter, he's on his knees, gasping for air, giving a little too much in thwarting the end of the match once more. Kisikil seems only here to cause as much pain as possible, leaning in to start gnawing on Havoc's ear, her teeth sinking deep and her tongue lashing hungrily at the blood that dribbles free. She spins him around, and licks the open wound on his throat - taking too long, and for her troubles receiving a swift, half-conscious headbutt from the bloodied and choked man.

There's a gleam in his eyes, as he leans forward and returns Lili's favor, digging his own teeth into her throat and chewing hungrily, tearing away a fleshy chunk that has her unleash an unholy hiss of pain, screeching like a cat as she wrenches on the electrical cable, drawing it tight into his carotid artery and forcing him to his knees in front of her. With rage born of desire, she hammers him with knee, after knee, after knee, from this position, keeping him upright by way of the taut cable, even as he drifts into unconsciousness. The violent display ends when Moxie intervenes, rolling to the outside and storming toward the violent pair, giving his partner a shove backwards and demanding she end this, before demonstrating how it's done - hoisting the collapsing Havoc up into an X-Plex on the apron! The impact is grotesque, and leaves him dangling from Lili's wire...

The demoness looks like she could marry Moxie right then and there, eyes bright with savage joy as she points him toward the ring, and the Mercenary, who's moving. Demanding he give that man the same just desserts. Moxie looks at her with a mix of disgust and violent intent, but acquiesces - and dives back into the ring, falling back onto the big man with a stiff clothesline, slamming into that meaty chest without successfully toppling Merc - but he's danced this dance before. Mercenary moves to counter, and he's hooked up for an X-Plex of his own, drilled into the mat, dragged to the middle of the ring...

The crowd is raging, sensing the end for the US Champions, boos and jeers already raining down when something just AWFUL happens.

Kisikil is grinning ear-to-goddamn-ear, singing sadistically to herself as she rolls out the electric cable, and starts swinging the ring bell around and around and around... before launching it heavenward, up into the rafters. Into the lights above the stage. It's a hell of a throw - and the weight of the ring bell drags down as the cable catches across her target, pulling the cable up into the rafters with Vin at its other end. The bell hangs lower, and lower...

Lili bounds onto the apron, soaked in gore, leaving a trail behind her, but still carelessly, gracefully leaps onto the turnbuckle, glances over her shoulder and POUNCES into the air, grabbing onto the ring bell--

--and hoisting Vin Havoc up into the air. There may be no disqualification, but Toyo Yasahiro knows a Very Bad Thing when he sees about it. Sparks fly from overhead, and many of the arena lights go out from the strain of a slicing cable, as the Wild Thing is carried into the air, hung by his neck from strands of biting copper. Suspended above the top rope for a long, ghastly moment.

Gasps run through the crowd, and there's a hesitant instant where near-silence falls.

KD: Oh my fucking god, the arena is falling apart!

P-Dug: THE SKY IS FALLING ON OUR HEADS, BIG BRO!!

Then there is only NOISE. Metallic lurching, electrical thunder, horrified screams and uncertain cheers, many of them all too jubilant from drunk motherfuckers who want chaos only slightly less than Kisikil does. The dangling bulk of Vin Havoc conspires to RIP an entire lighting rig from where it hangs, suspended, over the ring, bulbs shattering and heavy shades coming loose to rain danger upon the ring - that's nothing to the avalanche that it heralds. The sound is deafening. The mess is...

It's a lot. Havoc lands across the ropes, and the lighting rig falls directly on top of both him and Kisikil, who in the last instant is looking up, licking her messy lips and absolutely fucking delighted with what's happening, before a metal girder smashes into her, through her, and through the man who has thus far been her chosen prey.

The crowd ERUPTS, sounding four times their number in sheer outrage at what just happened. The arena's only partly lit, but enough light remains on the stage to see Moxie and the Mercenary at the boundary, both dazed, one on his feet and the other posted on one arm, but both staring in horror at the crushed bodies of Kisikil and Vin Havoc. At the wrecked ring, as it lurches--

--and falls apart, giving way completely, ropes snapping and boards splitting beneath them.

Moxie is flung one way, Mercenary the other. But somebody - anybody - has to finish the match. They both know it. They both know why they came here - even if one of them now has sincere and irrefutable doubt as to the intentions of his own partner. Moxie clambers upright, so does Mercenary. Each man steadies himself and then takes off, at their own, harried pace, and they collide like two unstoppable forces-- only one can win, and there's an expulsion of almost relief through the shellshocked arena as Moxie comes out on top with MOXIE'S ENDGAME! For the second time, the Mercenary is laid out, for the second time the cover is made...

At a rather less healthy or advisable angle, limbs trailing over the edge of the broken arena. There's no ropes left to make the break.

ONE!
.
.
.
TWO!!
.
.
.
THREE!!!

DING DING DING

Chriqui: And your winner, via pinfall ... the team of MOXIE AND KISIKIL!!!

Someone seems to have found a replacement bell, but it barely seems to matter who the winner is, at this point. Emergency services flood the ramp in a panic, medics moving to check on the definite possible human casualty and the very possibly inhuman one. There's blood everywhere, and electricity continues to spark in alarming arcs for several moments longer before the power is cut and - for the second time in two shows - Kisikil's involvement forces the arena to run on emergency power. The Mercenary remains down, as Moxie just stares with lips curled in derisive confusion, a fist raised in victory but still trying to rationalize how he ended up here.

If one good thing comes out of this, the non-catatonic half of the crowd at least discover a new chant.

"UN-HOLY SHIT! UN-HOLY SHIT!"

It could do with some workshopping.

KD: Folks, this was in no way a mystery we hoped to bring to you this evening. One of our US Champions is buried beneath smoking rubble, with several chunks taken out of him, and as we go off the air all I can tell you is, we have trained professionals on-site to resolve this situation and nurse that man back to health so he can appear in the Insanity Cage, God willing.

P-Dug: Can we, like, actually promise that?

KD: I don't know! But Moxie and Kisikil are your winners, after a hard-fought battle that ended in... this. We won't forget this main event anytime soon, and we WILL be back in action... with both of our co-champions, sure, let's just make that promise!

P-Dug: Hell... hell yeah. This is fine. Everything is fine.

Camera cuts to ...

---

END SCREEN

..................................................................................................................

SEGMENT WRITERS

Narumi Tsutsumi
Headhuntress Aiya
Samantha Hamilton
Vespertine
Vin Havoc and Mercenary

..................................................................................................................

MATCH WRITERS

Mystery Pool Matches
WRITER: Chunks of Darna Dare & FN'R

SEMI FINAL
WRITER: FN'R

MAIN EVENT
WRITER: Chunks of Darna Dare

..................................................................................................................


RECAP OF WINNERS

Cassie Wolfe Vs Jamie Love (NS)
Falls Count Anywhere
WINNER(S): Cassie Wolfe
...

Phoenix Winterborn Vs Kendrick Kross (NS)
T-L-C For 500K
WINNER(S): Phoenix Winterborn

...

Gideon Gage Vs Moonshine Inc
Handicap Match
WINNER(S): Gideon Gage

...

Jason Anderson Vs Headhuntress Aiya
Singles Match
WINNER(S): Jason Anderson

...

Tyler Bradford Vs Samantha Hamilton
First Blood
WINNER(S): Samantha Hamilton

...

Cosmo Goldworthy Vs Luke Saito
Kendo Stick On A Pole
WINNER(S): Cosmo Goldworthy

...

Chris Page Vs Vespertine
Scaffolding Match
WINNER(S): Vespertine

...

The Core Avengers Vs The House Hunters
Trios Tag
WINNER(S): The House Hunters Advance In Tournament

...

Moxie & Kisikil Vs The Mercenary & Vin Havoc
No DQ - Tag Team
WINNER(S): Moxie & Kisikil

...


...............................................................................................................…

MVP OF THE NIGHT: Cosmo Goldworthy, Moxie, Kisikil, Mercenary and Vin Havoc
MATCH OF THE NIGHT: Moxie & Kisikil Vs The Mercenary & Vin Havoc

© THE EXTREME WRESTLING CORPORATION 2023

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