Post by Emma Louise on Oct 2, 2023 18:13:45 GMT -6
We see an empty gymnasium. A single chair sits in the middle. We hear the metal doors slam closed and the sound of heels against the vinyl floor of the gymnasium. The sound of heels on floor stops and we see Emma Louise sit in the chair. She takes a moment or two to settle in before she begins to speak.
Emma Louise
“We all know the story. Girl gets injured. Girl gets backstage role. Girl loses backstage role. Girl is seen drunk in the early morning on a worldwide pay per view. Girl isn’t seen for almost a year.
What I want to do is tell the full story of it. Internet being the internet, there’s all kind of rumours out there. ‘Emma Louise was locked in an asylum.’ ‘Emma Louise shaved her head’ ‘Emma Louise was fired for wrestling while drunk’
The truth is I had a great job with Prime. I was basically a road agent. I made sure things ran smoothly and wrestlers were behind the curtain ready for their match. Sometimes I’d stand in for Marshall and Hayley if they were away on some business deal and Prime needed a GM to keep things ticking over. We know this. I’ve publicly spoken about it. I liked a drink. I liked a drink that much that I would turn up to work a little tipsy. Do it once and you get the ‘don’t do it again’ speech. Do it a few times and you get the ‘we have to part company’ speech.
I didn’t handle it well. Being let go from something you love, you just want to drown your sorrows. So I did. EWC management were willing to keep me on as in-ring talent but it came with the proviso that I wasn’t drinking. It’s dangerous to be in there drunk with other peoples bodies on the line. I found a work around. If I was working on a Wednesday night, I’d stop drinking on a Tuesday. I could stop for twenty four hours. Post show, I’d be in the bar having a beer with the boys or something and I’d keep on going until the following Tuesday. It wasn’t my wisest moment.
Then came WrestleFest. A four day all day wrestling party with food and drink trucks a-plenty. I wasn’t booked to compete on the show so I partook in the festivities and got into the party mood. I was spotted on camera in no condition to be anything. I was on the receiving end of some very angry phone calls. I was supplied with a stack of coffee and told to sober my ass up.
The next day I was suspended indefinatly.
So I went home. I was feeling down so I kept drinking. It was the holiday season so I kept drinking. My girlfriend didn’t want to stay and watch any more of my self destruction so she left. So I kept drinking.
It was good to be with my family over the holidays. It was good that they were happy for me to stay on for a bit. It wasn’t so good when everything came to a head two weeks into the new year.
After that my mum got on the phone to whoever in the EWC front office that she could and she damn near begged them to put me in rehab. Sure enough a week later I was checked into a facility in Alabama.
I did group. I did the whole ‘My name is Emma and I’m an alcoholic’ thing. I did one on one. I did meditation. I did yoga I did the hell that was a detox. I even had a fucking banzai tree!
At the start of August, they declared me fit and well enough that I could go home. I’m not going to lie or pretend it’s all been easy. Alcoholism is a problem that will probably follow me to the damn grave. I’ve recently been putting my energies into hitting the gym.”
Emma takes a moment to look around her surroundings.
Emma Louise
“Not this gym but THE gym. The kinda thing with bikes and treadmills, rowing machines and weights. I wanted to have this big comeback.
I wanted to come back at WrestleFest. The idea of coming back on the same same show I began my fall appealed to me. To come back and be in the ring at the top of my fitness spoke to me.
Failing that I was looking at returning in the new season. New season: New me and all that. The whole thing had a back to school vibe which, again, spoke to me.
Then I saw the throwback Prime.
The old logo. The one I have on a hoodie. The one I represented proudly. MY logo!
It shone to me like a bat signal calling to me. I put my name forward. I felt I had to be there. I couldn’t not be on a throwback Prime.
As I sit here, I don’t know if I’ll get booked or not. Hope I do.
I’ll be honest, part of me hopes that I can impress in and out of the ring. Faith, I know. Jordan, I know well. He’s like a brother to me at times. We talk and joke and laugh. True story: my actual brother has referred to Jordan as ‘other me’ because of how like a brother to me he is. Plus they have similar interests.
I’m not sitting here saying I expect Jordan to hand me my old role with open arms. Especially not after one show.
However a journey must always begin with the first step.
I’m hoping if I can keep my nose clean, show that I can stay clean, sober and trustworthy enough that I’ll be looked at for something. Don’t get me wrong, I like punching people hard in the face. Take my frustrations at other shit out on the one across the ring from me. It’s like therapy, only physical. But I loved my other role. It made me feel part of something. It made me feel like I contributed. It made me feel needed.
I drank to be social. When I got too much, I drank to fill holes. Holes where Prime once was. Holes where my girlfriend was. I don’t want to be the girl that sits here rambling on about ‘Straight Edge means I’m better than all of you’ but being clean has given me focus. If I want Prime or EWC to look at me like they used to, I know what I can and can not do. To get to Prime, I need to start with being on Prime. See you then.
IF I’m booked.”
Emma Louise stands up and walks out of shot. The sound of her heels recede as we hear her walk away. The metal doors slam and we fade out.