Post by Sedition: The Rev on Jan 15, 2010 21:00:10 GMT -6
*The Rampage logo appears in the bottom right hand corner of the screen. A shot fades in revealing Friday Night Rampage General Managers, The Rev and Gladiator, sitting behind a news desk. A cheesy 70s style Action News theme plays briefly and fades into silence. Rev straightens his equally cheesy tweed jacket and straightens his uncoordinated necktie. Gladiator is trying to lean off camera as he discreetly talks on his cell phone. Rev shuffles a sheet of papers and stares into the camera.*
REV: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. It's Friday night, and this is a very special live broadcast of The Sedition Edition. I am your host, The Rev, and this tie IS indeed a clip on. This just in, Rampage rocks our world in it's 2010 premiere episode. Last week's history making debut under Sedition management broke every ratings record in the books, caused the biggest riot in Winnipeg since Neil Young's 100th birthday celebration, and effectively ended civil war in the third world country of Azbookastan! Never heard of Azbookastan you say? Well, that's the American education system for ya.
On the other side of the.......... uh.............. week............ Monday Night Brawl brought us Shadow Man's tips on how to poach your eggs while shirtless!
cough, cough...
sniffle, sniffle...
cricket, cricket
sniffle, sniffle...
cricket, cricket
REV: But that's not all! Next week, Deadpool will show you how to prepare your oatmeal while wearing a thong!
*Gladiator raises his voice as he continues his phone conversation.*
GLADIATOR: No, no, no! I don't care what the rules state. Rules are meant to be broken.
REV: Yes.......... and continuing on with our report. In other Brawl news, The New Age Legion plan on adding another 16 members to their massive stable of boy scout do-gooders, officially recruiting EVERY SINGLE MEMBER OF THE BRAWL ROSTER to their bland stable of talentless hacks......
GLADIATOR: We're talking in circles here. Plain and simple, this deal has to go through. You gave us creative control over our show, and our roster is part of this show. That gives us the final say on who can compete for Rampage. Hypothetically, if I wanted to book David Arquette's mom, I'm free to do that.
REV: Please ignore the ranting maniac to my left. Back to the topic at hand. Brawl. While President Mac continues to receive production tips from the creative team behind “The Jay Leno Show” we here at Rampage gear up to bring you another Friday Night filled with violence, chaos, mayhem, and of course the dashing and debonaire presence of yours truly.
*FNR's other General Manager, Gladiator, hangs up his phone and steps into frame.*
GLADIATOR: Rev! Why didn't you tell me we were on the air.
REV: I did.
GLADIATOR: Did not.
REV: Did too.
GLADIATOR: Not.
REV: Too.
GLADIATOR: Not.
REV: Too.
GLADIATOR: Oh forget about it. You see, I've just been on the phone politely discussing a matter with President Mac. After much debate, I have just secured a major deal that will all but guarantee that the winner of Rumble in the Bronx will come from the Rampage roster. Stay tuned tonight after our main event as we introduce you to a surprise guest. A pinch hitter for Rampage if you will. And who says you can't buy a win these days.
REV: Yes!!!!!!!!! Get ready for a surprise people.
GLADIATOR: We will make this announcement after the main event. That way all the people at home are forced to watch the rest of these losers for an hour.
REV: Lots of surprises to come tonight. Who's the masked man that attacked William Rast last week? Who will win our main event in the Barbed Wire Cage? And who is the special returning star from the past that will announce their entrance in the Rumble in the Bronx? Stay tuned to find out. This is Friday Night Rampage, where the mentally disturbed kids play.
________________________________________
LIVE from The American Airlines Center in Dallas, Texas
LIVE from The American Airlines Center in Dallas, Texas
*The sound of over 20,000 screaming fans fills the American Airlines Center. In the midst of the cheers and screams, one chant can be heard repeated over and over again.
FNR,
FNR,
FNR,
FNR
FNR,
FNR,
FNR
The camera pans across the crowd, revealing signs. One reads “I'm the Masked Man”. Another says “French Montana stole my car”, and yet another reads “Mike Thunder does Middle Age Proud” Standing at ringside we see David Arquette and Scott Caan. Arquette is wearing a big dopey cowboy hat and chaps.*
ARQUETTE: Welcome to another week of Friday Night Rampage! It's deafening in here! Can you hear me above all these screaming fans?
CAAN: I'm sorry, I can't hear you above that ridiculously loud cowboy costume. What're you, nine?
ARQUETTE: Ugh! Don't even get me started. Rev and Gladiator told me because we were in Dallas, it was mandatory that all staff dress as cowboys. I show up this afternoon and I'm the only one in costume.
CAAN: Hahahaha! They told you that just to see if you were a big enough douche to wear it. And surprise surprise, you are.
ARQUETTE: Whatever! I'll blend in with the Texans!
CAAN: The only way you're blending in with the Texans while dressed like that is if you find a good Gay Night Club after the show.
_________________________________________________
ON TONIGHT'S EPISODE
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Bruce Danger
-vs-
Ty Luca
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Busaiku Maya
-vs-
Bryce Bridges
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Mike Thunder
-vs-
Danielle Deathstrike
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
GRUDGE MATCH
(Special Enforcer: Gladiator)
Pence Weatherlight
-vs-
The Masked Man
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
BARBED WIRE CAGE MATCH
"Tropical Tornado" Ianzky
-vs-
French Montana
-vs-
Kip Kutler
___________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Bruce Danger
-vs-
Ty Luca
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Busaiku Maya
-vs-
Bryce Bridges
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Mike Thunder
-vs-
Danielle Deathstrike
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
GRUDGE MATCH
(Special Enforcer: Gladiator)
Pence Weatherlight
-vs-
The Masked Man
________________________________________________________________
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
BARBED WIRE CAGE MATCH
"Tropical Tornado" Ianzky
-vs-
French Montana
-vs-
Kip Kutler
___________________________________________
ARQUETTE: And just as a reminder to fans who may have missed it last week, the winner of that Barbed Wire Cage Match will get to choose their entrance position in the Rumble in the Bronx, which is a little over 2 weeks away. This past Monday on Brawl, Deathlocke won a Battle Royal which secured him his choice as well. With a guaranteed Title shot for the winner of the Rumble, it's all the more important that Tropical Tornado, French Montana and Kip Kutler bring their A-Game tonight. Choosing the right entrance number can give someone a HUGE advantage.
CAAN: No doubt about that.
ARQUETTE: But we have a lot of show to get to before that. In our opening match, Ty Luca makes his first appearance on Rampage. He pulled off an impressive win on HCWs show last month. Who did he beat in his first match? None other than Kip Kutler, who we'll see a little later. Can Luca make it two in a row against newcomer Bruce Danger tonight? We'll see. It's the opening contest. Check it out.
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Bruce Danger
-vs-
Ty Luca
REGULAR MATCH
Bruce Danger
-vs-
Ty Luca
Luca and Danger lock up in the center of the ring. Danger applies a Side Headlock, but Luca pushes him towards the ropes. Danger bounces off the ropes and Luca catches him with a Hip Toss. Danger gets on his feet and charges at Luca. Luca catches him with a Back Body Drop. Luca stands with his back to Danger who's lying on the mat. Luca drops on Danger with a Standing Moonsault. Luca hooks Danger's leg for the cover,
1...
2...
Danger kicks out. Luca picks Danger up and whips him to the corner. Luca runs at him with a Clotheline, but Danger ducks out of the way. Luca crashes into the turnbuckle. Danger grabs him from behind and applies a Reverse Chin Lock, but Luca reverses with a Snapmare. Luca grabs Danger by the head and delivers a Reverse Vertical Suplex. Luca runs towards the ropes and springboards off the second rope. He flies back and lands on Danger with a Lionsault. Luca goes for the cover
1...
2...
Danger kicks out. Luca picks Danger up and drops him down with a Sitdown Crucifix Bomb.
ARQUETTE: “Quite an impressive display by Ty Luca. He's completely out wrestling Bruce Danger.”
Luca climbs up on the top rope and Danger gets up on his feet. Luca jumps off and hits Danger with a Flipover Neckbreaker. Luca goes for the cover
1...
2...
Danger kicks out. Luca climbs up to the top rope, but Danger gets up on his feet. Danger grabs Luca by the foot and Luca loses his balance. Luca drops down on the top turnbuckle and Danger climbs up to the top rope. Danger delivers a Superplex. Danger goes for the cover
1...
2...
Luca kicks out. Danger picks Luca up and lifts him up in a Powerbomb, but Luca flips back with a Hurricanranna. Luca picks Danger up and applies a Sleeper Hold. Slowly but surely Danger begins to lose conciousness. Danger drops down to his knees. The ref picks Danger's hand up and it drops. He picks it up the second time and it drops again. The ref picks his hand up one last time, but Danger is able to keep his hand up. Danger gets back up to his feet, but Luca delivers a Sleeping Neckbreaker. Luca climbs up on the top rope and dives off with a Guillotine Leg Drop, but Danger moves out of the way. Luca crashes down to the mat. Danger picks him up and picks Luca up in a Front Suplex. Instead of falling back, Danger drops Luca down into a Facebuster. Danger goes for the cover
1...
2...
Luca kicks out.
ARQUETTE: “Bruce Danger is trying to fight back, but he just can't seem to get anywhere.”
CAAN: “Kind of like your acting career. You keep trying to get it going, but you just aren't going anywhere.”
ARQUETTE: “Leave me alone. Wes Craven is gonna call anyday now about Scream 4. The we'll see who's laughing.”
Danger climbs up on the top rope. Luca gets up on his feet and Danger hits him with a Missile Dropkick. Danger goes to pick Luca up, but Luca grabs his foot and trips him down to the mat. Danger gets up on his feet and runs at Luca with a Clothesline. Luca ducks it and hits Danger with THE HIT. Luca goes for the cover,
1...
2...
3.
CHIRQUI: “Here is your winner, TY LUCA!!!”
_______________________________________
*The camera cuts backstage to the admin office of The Sedition. There's a knock on the door. Before waiting for an answer, Bryce Bridges walks right in.*
GLADIATR: Uh................ come in?
BRYCE: Look bosses, I have a small request. I understand that this week's main event was predetermined, but if you don't have anyone else in mind, I wanted to be booked in next week's main event.
REV: I see, and what are your qualifications?
GLADIATOR: Besides losing to Kip Kutler last week.
REV: Hahahaha!
GLADIATOR: Ahahahaha!
REV: Ahahahahaha!
BRYCE: Look, I didn't lose to Kip Kutler! I never got pinned. DeAndre was the one who lost. Stupid Triple Threat rule technicalities. If you guys had booked it as an elimination match in the first place, I would be the one main eventing this week, not that joke Kip Kutler.
REV: Do I detect a hint of jealousy in that statement?
BRYCE: Jealous of Kip Kutler? Please, he wins one match and suddenly he's Mr. Superstar around here. I mean come on, even David Arquette did more than that in his pro wrestling career.
GLADIATOR: Now come on, no need to be offensive comparing him to the -redacted-. Kip Kutler means ratings around here. Everyone loves a bad boy. As far as it goes with you, let's see how you do this week. Show us what you got, and we'll consider giving you a second chance at the main event.
BRYCE: If that's what it's gonna take, then consider it done. Bonzai, Boonsocky or Busaiku, whatever he wants to call himself, is about to have the shortest career in EWC history. I'll show you that Bryce Bridges means business.
*Bryce Bridges swings open the door and exits, slamming the door behind him.*
____________________________________
Commercial for Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
VIDEO GAME VIOLENCE GOES QUEER
____________________________________
Commercial for Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony
VIDEO GAME VIOLENCE GOES QUEER
____________________________________
ARQUETTE: We are back, and just before the break you saw Bryce Bridges pleading his case before Rev and Gladiator. It seems like he's a little upset that he didn't win last week, and even more upset that Kip Kutler's main eventing 2 weeks in a row instead of him.
CAAN: Jealousy gets you nowhere in show business. That's why I'm still a movie star and Arquette now flips burgers at Wendy's 5 nights a week.
ARQUETTE: Hey, it's 3 times a week, and it's not like I have a choice. This job barely covers my travel costs .
CAAN: Well Rev and Gladiator did say that if Bryce impressed them this week, they'd consider placing him back in a main event spot.
ARQUETTE: Time for him to impress then.
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Busaiku Maya
-vs-
Bryce Bridges
REGULAR MATCH
Busaiku Maya
-vs-
Bryce Bridges
Edge of Seventeen by Jonas hits the PA system as the lights turn pink and green. Bryce walks out with his trademark zebra fedora. He walks with a cocky undertone, getting booed every step of the way. He goes to high five a fan who tries return the favor, but before he makes contact, he quickly lowers his hand, and gives the fan a pissed off look. Bryce shakes his head in a disapproving manor and moves along.
Announcer: Coming to the ring! At a weight of 254 lbs! From the Edge of Seventeen............... "B DOUBLE" BRYCE BRIDGES!
Bridges slides into the ring and heads to the turnbuckle, climbing to the second rope. He makes a chicken wing with his right arm, taunting for the roaring elbow. He climbs down from the turnbuckle.
The lights go back to normal and the music cuts over to Failures conquest by Arsis. The fans start to cheer as Busaiku comes to the entrance ramp and drops to a knee and holds his arm up. He then runs to the ring, sliding under the bottom rope. Bridges wastes no time starts to stop his opponent before he can get up.
The bell rings as Maya manages to get to his feet. Both men lock up; Bridges gets thrown into the corner. Maya comes over and smashes Bridges’ head into the turnbuckle. Maya executes a headlock takedown and goes for a quick pin but Bridges kicks out before even a one count.
ARQUETTE: Foolish beginners mistake. Never go for the pin in the first 17 seconds.
Bridges gets back to his feet and both men lockup again. Bridges wins the power struggle and executes a belly-to-belly suplex. Bridges climbs to his feet and drags Maya to the floor. The referee starts the count .1..2…3. Maya gets up and hits a jumping sidekick on Bridges. Bridges stumbles back. He charges at Maya and hits him with the back of his elbow. The referee continues the count ....4….5. Maya leans against the apron as Bridges roles back into the ring. Bridges leans over the ropes, grabbing Maya by the hair, pulling him to the apron. Maya nails Bridge with a stiff uppercut and steps back inside the ring as Bridges takes a few steps back. Maya tries for a tiger driver but Bridges avoids it. Maya takes Bridges down with a knee strike. Maya measures Bridges up and drops a closed fist. Maya quickly climbs the turnbuckle, hitting Bridges with a falling splash. Maya slowly pulls Bridges to his feet. Bridges gets free of Maya’s grip and executes a swinging bulldog, driving Maya's face into the mat. Bridges stomps Maya, kicking him in the ribs. The ref interjects to break things up.
CAAN: Bryce Bridges is fighting like a man on a mission.
Maya pulls himself up using the ropes. Bridges closes in on Maya. Maya rakes the face of Bridges in attempt to make a comeback. Bridges steps back and nails Maya with a power clothesline. Bridges goes for the cover; the ref drops to the mat and starts the count.
.1
..2
Maya kicks out!
Bridges pounds the mat in frustration, arguing the count with the referee.
Bridges leg drops the throat of Maya. Bridges grabs Maya and applies an arm wrench. Maya gets free with a hard chop to Bridges. Bridges kicks Maya in the midsection and delivers a DDT to Maya. Bridges goes for the pin.
.1
..2
Maya kicks out again!
Bridges pounds the mat in frustration, even more irate.
CAAN: Feeling a little on edge, are we Bryce?
ARQUETTE: Bryce should try some calming techniques. Like yoga or something.
CAAN: Hahaha! Yoga. You're such a f*g. Calming techniques never won somebody a match.
Bridges gets in the referees face, yelling and cursing him. Maya gets to his feet and charges at Bridges. Bridges turns, delivering the Roaring Elbow to Maya. Maya drops the mat and Bridges wastes no time going for the cover. The ref starts the count.
.1
..2
Maya gets a foot on the ropes and the ref stops the count.
Bridges looks around in disbelief. He pulls Maya to his feet and whips him into the turnbuckle. He follows up with a running splash. Maya sinks to the mat and Bridges delivers a series of stomps to the chest. Bridges pulls Maya to his feet and puts him in position for the Lyon Bomb. He taunts the crowd for a moment and delivers the Lyon Bomb, pinning Maya. The ref drops the mat and counts.
.1
..2
…3
Winner: Bryce Bridges
ARQUETTE: And with that, Bryce Bridges picks up a win.
CAAN: Now it's just wait and see if The Sedition were impressed enough to give him the main even next week.
_____________________________________
[Mike Thunder is walking down the hallway doing fist pumps to prepare for his match with Danielle Deathstrike. He stops short and takes a sip of water from the water fountain. He proceeds to continue down the hallway until someone calls him out. It’s Owen Masters.]
Owen Masters: Hey! Thunder. Good luck.
Mike Thunder: Thanks, no luck is needed. That bitch is going down, just like I did to Britney Stasiak.
Owen Masters: Yo, man, take it easy, willyah?
Mike Thunder: I’ve never felt more ready than I do now… The time for Mike Thunder to bring total chaos to Rampage is now.
Owen Masters: Good luck.
Mike Thunder: Thanks.
[The two men separate and Thunder exits the hallway…]
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
REGULAR MATCH
Mike Thunder
-vs-
Danielle Deathstrike
REGULAR MATCH
Mike Thunder
-vs-
Danielle Deathstrike
“The following match is set for one fall with a thirty minute time limit.”
The lights go out. It is dark in the arena. Loud sound effects of thundering claps are heard. Few lights flicker as if they're lightning. Out comes Mike Thunder in his black tights with the name THUNDER on his buttocks, with black boots and kneepads. His dark brown hair is dripping wet, pulled back. A white towel in his hand as he wipes off the dripping water off his face. He marches slowly to the ring, with the spotlight following every step of his to the ring. He tosses the towel to the crowd as he nears ringside. He walks up the steel steps and climbs the turnbuckle to examine the crowd. He enters the ring from the turnbuckle and runs the ropes before getting amped up, yelling at the crowd.
“Introducing first, from Chicago, IL, weighing in at 245 lbs. He is the ‘Legendary’ Mike Thunder.”
"No Regrets" by Dope begins to play, and the lights begin to flicker with crimson. The Goddess of Pain comes out from behind the curtains with a hard heel walk. She walks down the ramp, eyeballing the fans as she does. She goes around the ring to her right, and hops onto the apron. She stands on the apron and looks at the fans, smirking. She then enters the ring and her music stops.
“And his opponent, from Scottsdale, AZ, weighing in at 135 lbs. She is the goddess of pain. This is Danielle Deathstrike.”
The bell sounds and Mike storms out of the corner clotheslining Danielle right out of her boots. Mike stalks Dani for a moment before picking her up and slamming her back into the match with a thunderous powerslam.
CAAN: “Man, it doesn’t look like Danielle came here to fight.”
ARQUETTE: “This just proves that a woman does not belong in the ring with a man. They are bound to get hurt and then how will us men get our dinner.”
Mike trapped Dani in the corner and used his foot to choke her. The ref counts for him to release. 1...... 2....... 3....... Thunder releases at 4. Dragging Dani out of the corner, Mike climbed the ropes before connecting with a the “Thunder Driver”. The rest was academic as Mike made the cover for the count of
1...
2.....
3.
“The winner of this match is the ‘Legendary’ Mike Thunder.”
CAAN: Wow. I blinked for a second. What did I miss?
ARQUETTE: Mike Thunder's comeback is officially underway.
CAAN: I knew he would be determined to pick up a win after what he went through last week, but wow.
ARQUETTE: We'll be back after this commercial break.
The Theme From Patton begins to play, and Gladiator steps out on the ramp. Following closely behind is the masked man. Gladiator and Hades step into the ring. They are greeted by the boos of the thousands of fans in attendance. Gladiator picks up a mic.
GLADIATOR: “Good evening Rampage fans. First allow me to officially introduce Rampage's newest acquisition. Making his return to the EWC. He is one of the toughest, fiercest competitors the world has ever seen. I give you... Victor Hades! How about a round of applause for Victor.”
The masked man removes his mask and indeed it is Victor Hades. The fans boo loudly. Victor crosses his arms and expression is stone cold. He seems completely unphased by the fans reaction.
ARQUETTE: “Victor Hades? He used to be a member of The Sedition. Is he the surprise entrant in the Rumble In The Bronx?”
CAAN: “No he couldn't be. Rev and Gladiator said it would be revealed after the Main Event.”
GLADIATOR: “Now I know what you are thinking here, you're thinking that there is no way I can remain impartial as the special enforcer in this match given my past dealings with Hades, and my past rivalries with Pants. Let me tell you, here on Rampage, the past means nothing. My relationship with Victor Hades is no different than my relationship with any other member of the Rampage roster. As for my supposed rivalry with Pants, I assure you that it is simply one big misunderstanding. I have no ill feelings towards Pants, and I intend to be fair and impartial tonight. To further prove my fairness, I'm going to give our faithful referee Sylvain Grenier the match off. Go back and have a coffee Sylvain, it's on me.”
Gladiator hands Sylvain some change for the vending machine. Sylvain walks away and Gladiator removes his suit jacket and reveals a striped referee shirt.
GLADIATOR: “In the interest of fairness, I have banned the New Age Legion from the arena tonight. I'm sorry, but I just don't feel that it's right for Pants to have back up and Victor to be all alone out here. I'm simply trying to be fair.”
The fans begin to boo even louder, clearly seeing right through Gladiator's act.
GLADIATOR: “Now, without further delay, I'd like to invite Pants Weatherman down to the ring and let's get this match under way.”
”Everything” by Pillar begins to play and Pence Weatherlight begins to make his way to the ring. He is slightly more reluctant than usual. Pence stops at the ring and looks in at Gladiator and Hades. Pence hesitates to step in the ring.
ARQUETTE: “Pence seems a little more reluctant than usual. He clearly doesn't trust Gladiator when he says he'll be impartial.”
CAAN: “Who could blame him considering the history between him and Gladiator.”
ARQUETTE: “I'm amazed Pence showed up at all, but Pence is a man of honour. He would never back down from a challenge.”
Pence slowly steps into the ring, never taking his eyes off Gladiator, and Hades. The music stops and Gladiator steps to the center of the ring. Gladiator motions for both men to step to the center. Hades immediately steps to the center of the ring. Pence steps forward slowly but surely. As both men are in the middle of the ring, Gladiator motions for the bell. Gladiator steps back and Pence lunges forward at Hades. He quickly lays into him with punches to the head. Gladiator comes from behind and kicks Pence in the back. The kick sends Pence forward towards Hades who catches him and delivers a Belly to Belly Suplex over the top rope. Pence flies over the top rope and hits the concrete.
ARQUETTE: “So much for fair and impartial. That sure went out the window fast.”
Hades climbs to the outside. He picks up a monitor from off the broadcast table. Pence gets up on his knees and Hades raises the monitor up in the air and smashes it over Pence's head. Gladiator steps outside of the ring. Hades lifts Pence up and holds him. Gladiator grabs a steel chair. He swings the chair and cracks Pence in the head with it. Pence drops down to the ground now bleeding from his forehead. Gladiator places the chair on Pence's head and holds it in place. Hades climbs up on the apron. Hades jumps off the apron and stomps down on the chair, crushing Pence's head underneath. Hades picks Pence up. Gladiator reaches under the ring and pulls out a sledgehammer. Hades whips Pence towards Gladiator, and Gladiator hits him in the head with the sledgehammer. Hades climbs up on the apron and pulls Pence up with him. Hades lifts Pence up and Powerbombs him off the apron and through the broadcast table. As Pence lies in the wreckage of what was once a solid table, Gladiator swings the sledgehammer down and hits Pence repeatedly in the ribs.
ARQUETTE: “This isn't even a wrestling match. This is a butchering, plain and simple.”
CAAN: “Yeah, a two on one butchering.”
Hades lifts Pence up and rolls him into the ring. Hades slides into the ring. Gladiator grabs a table and slides it into the ring. Gladiator sets up the table in the middle of the ring. Hades lifts Pence up on his shoulders and climbs up on the top rope. Hades delivers a Super Death Valley Driver off the top rope and drives Pence through the table. Hades covers Pence, and Gladiator gets in place with a very fast count,
1...
2...
3.
CHIRQUI: “Here is your winner, VICTOR HADES!!!”
Gladiator grabs a microphone. Hades lifts Pence up to his knees and holds him by the hair. Gladiator raises the mic.
GLADIATOR: “I warned you. I told you not to mess with The Sedition, but you just couldn't leave it alone. You had to run your mouth off on Brawl and call me out. Listen to me, and listen very carefully Pants. Stay away from Rampage, and stay out of my business. This was simply a warning shot. This is simply a taste of what The Sedition is fully capable of, and it is only a brief glimpse of the carnage that Victor Hades can unleash.”
Gladiator backs away and nails Pence with a punt kick to the head.
GLADIATOR: “Victor, get this fan loving, do-gooder out of your ring. The spotlight here on Rampage belongs to you my friend.”
Hades picks Pence up and tosses him out of the ring. Gladiator steps out of the ring and walks backstage. EMT's rush out to tend to Pence and Hades stands in the ring with his arms raised in the air as the fans boo.
ARQUETTE: “We have just witnessed a savage attack on Pence Weatherlight. Pence wasn't even given a fair chance at fighting back.”
CAAN: “This was The Sedition at their worst. As if facing the beastly Victor Hades isn't a daunting enough task, Pence had to contend with him and Gladiator.”
ARQUETTE: I have a funny feeling this war between The Sedition and The New Age Legion is far from over. If it's not resolved soon, it could develop into a full fledged war between Brawl and Rampage. We'll be right back after this commercial break.
The lights go out. It is dark in the arena. Loud sound effects of thundering claps are heard. Few lights flicker as if they're lightning. Out comes Mike Thunder in his black tights with the name THUNDER on his buttocks, with black boots and kneepads. His dark brown hair is dripping wet, pulled back. A white towel in his hand as he wipes off the dripping water off his face. He marches slowly to the ring, with the spotlight following every step of his to the ring. He tosses the towel to the crowd as he nears ringside. He walks up the steel steps and climbs the turnbuckle to examine the crowd. He enters the ring from the turnbuckle and runs the ropes before getting amped up, yelling at the crowd.
“Introducing first, from Chicago, IL, weighing in at 245 lbs. He is the ‘Legendary’ Mike Thunder.”
"No Regrets" by Dope begins to play, and the lights begin to flicker with crimson. The Goddess of Pain comes out from behind the curtains with a hard heel walk. She walks down the ramp, eyeballing the fans as she does. She goes around the ring to her right, and hops onto the apron. She stands on the apron and looks at the fans, smirking. She then enters the ring and her music stops.
“And his opponent, from Scottsdale, AZ, weighing in at 135 lbs. She is the goddess of pain. This is Danielle Deathstrike.”
The bell sounds and Mike storms out of the corner clotheslining Danielle right out of her boots. Mike stalks Dani for a moment before picking her up and slamming her back into the match with a thunderous powerslam.
CAAN: “Man, it doesn’t look like Danielle came here to fight.”
ARQUETTE: “This just proves that a woman does not belong in the ring with a man. They are bound to get hurt and then how will us men get our dinner.”
Mike trapped Dani in the corner and used his foot to choke her. The ref counts for him to release. 1...... 2....... 3....... Thunder releases at 4. Dragging Dani out of the corner, Mike climbed the ropes before connecting with a the “Thunder Driver”. The rest was academic as Mike made the cover for the count of
1...
2.....
3.
“The winner of this match is the ‘Legendary’ Mike Thunder.”
CAAN: Wow. I blinked for a second. What did I miss?
ARQUETTE: Mike Thunder's comeback is officially underway.
CAAN: I knew he would be determined to pick up a win after what he went through last week, but wow.
ARQUETTE: We'll be back after this commercial break.
____________________________________
The Spy Next Door
Remember when it was called “THE PACIFIER”?
____________________________________
The Spy Next Door
Remember when it was called “THE PACIFIER”?
____________________________________
*The show returns to a montage of clips featuring the The Sedition. A voice over plays over slow motion shots Rev and Gladiator.*
n the weeks before Rampage returned,
The Sedition lead an assault on the Monday Night Brawl program...
From the kidnapping and brain washing of Joe Aiello, to their constant disturbances backstage...
The Sedition made an attempt to destroy Brawl before Rampage returned to the air...
*The montage of clips now shows the formation of the New Age Legion.*
In response to this threat from The Sedition, Pence Weatherlight reformed THE NEW AGE LEGION
Their goal was a collective one....
To be the shining light of Monday Night Brawl....
and to wage war on The Sedition....
*The montage now skips to clips from last week's match between William Rast, Project Zzyzx and the Mystery Rampage superstar*
Last week, New Age Legion member, William Rast, was brutally attacked by a masked man....
The Rampage General Managers, Rev and Gladiator, watching from the entranceway....
The New Age Legion accused Rev and Gladiator of planting the masked man for the sole purpose of taking out Rast....
Then on Brawl, Pence Weatherlight issued a challenge to The Sedition...
Pence: I want a piece of you Gladiator, I want to beat the ever living shit out of you till you cry, just like I did oh so long ago in the land of hardcore. So you find me and accept my challenge or I will find you and force you to.
Gladiator walks into the locker room.
Gladiator: Hey, did I here someone say my name?
Gladiator steps toe to toe with Pence. Ace Heart sticks his microphone in between the two.
Pence: What are you doing here?
Gladiator: I just came to clear up a little misunderstanding Pants Weatherman. It seems there's some confusion about what happened to William Rast on Friday Night.
Pence: There's no confusion. You had your masked thug attack him.
Gladiator: No, no, no. We did no such thing. Rev and I just came wanted to watch the match between Rast and Zzyzyx, and this masked man came from out of nowhere. I assure you we are doing everything in our power to find out his identity and bring him to justice.
Pence: I'm not buying it. I know how The Sedition operate. I will not stand by and watch you guys ruin this business. I'm challenging you to a fight anyplace, anytime.
Gladiator: Pants my friend, as much as I would love to be nostalgic and step into the ring with you for old times sake, I am officially retired. I'm a legitimate business man now. Plus my Sciatica has been acting up lately, and I've got this lump on my neck that isn't getting any better. I'm in no shape to compete. I'll tell you what I will do, since your beef is clearly not with us, but with the masked man I will book you in a match against him this Friday. And just to be sure that no funny business takes place this time, I will personally be at ringside to act as a special enforcer. Hopefully then The Sedition will finally earn your trust.
*Side by side frozen images are shown of Pence Weatherlight, The Masked Man, and Gladiator in the middle. The dramatic music fades out and the shot fades back to the arena.*
n the weeks before Rampage returned,
The Sedition lead an assault on the Monday Night Brawl program...
From the kidnapping and brain washing of Joe Aiello, to their constant disturbances backstage...
The Sedition made an attempt to destroy Brawl before Rampage returned to the air...
*The montage of clips now shows the formation of the New Age Legion.*
In response to this threat from The Sedition, Pence Weatherlight reformed THE NEW AGE LEGION
Their goal was a collective one....
To be the shining light of Monday Night Brawl....
and to wage war on The Sedition....
*The montage now skips to clips from last week's match between William Rast, Project Zzyzx and the Mystery Rampage superstar*
Last week, New Age Legion member, William Rast, was brutally attacked by a masked man....
The Rampage General Managers, Rev and Gladiator, watching from the entranceway....
The New Age Legion accused Rev and Gladiator of planting the masked man for the sole purpose of taking out Rast....
Then on Brawl, Pence Weatherlight issued a challenge to The Sedition...
Pence: I want a piece of you Gladiator, I want to beat the ever living shit out of you till you cry, just like I did oh so long ago in the land of hardcore. So you find me and accept my challenge or I will find you and force you to.
Gladiator walks into the locker room.
Gladiator: Hey, did I here someone say my name?
Gladiator steps toe to toe with Pence. Ace Heart sticks his microphone in between the two.
Pence: What are you doing here?
Gladiator: I just came to clear up a little misunderstanding Pants Weatherman. It seems there's some confusion about what happened to William Rast on Friday Night.
Pence: There's no confusion. You had your masked thug attack him.
Gladiator: No, no, no. We did no such thing. Rev and I just came wanted to watch the match between Rast and Zzyzyx, and this masked man came from out of nowhere. I assure you we are doing everything in our power to find out his identity and bring him to justice.
Pence: I'm not buying it. I know how The Sedition operate. I will not stand by and watch you guys ruin this business. I'm challenging you to a fight anyplace, anytime.
Gladiator: Pants my friend, as much as I would love to be nostalgic and step into the ring with you for old times sake, I am officially retired. I'm a legitimate business man now. Plus my Sciatica has been acting up lately, and I've got this lump on my neck that isn't getting any better. I'm in no shape to compete. I'll tell you what I will do, since your beef is clearly not with us, but with the masked man I will book you in a match against him this Friday. And just to be sure that no funny business takes place this time, I will personally be at ringside to act as a special enforcer. Hopefully then The Sedition will finally earn your trust.
*Side by side frozen images are shown of Pence Weatherlight, The Masked Man, and Gladiator in the middle. The dramatic music fades out and the shot fades back to the arena.*
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
GRUDGE MATCH
(Special Enforcer: Gladiator)
Pence Weatherlight
-vs-
The Masked Man
GRUDGE MATCH
(Special Enforcer: Gladiator)
Pence Weatherlight
-vs-
The Masked Man
The Theme From Patton begins to play, and Gladiator steps out on the ramp. Following closely behind is the masked man. Gladiator and Hades step into the ring. They are greeted by the boos of the thousands of fans in attendance. Gladiator picks up a mic.
GLADIATOR: “Good evening Rampage fans. First allow me to officially introduce Rampage's newest acquisition. Making his return to the EWC. He is one of the toughest, fiercest competitors the world has ever seen. I give you... Victor Hades! How about a round of applause for Victor.”
The masked man removes his mask and indeed it is Victor Hades. The fans boo loudly. Victor crosses his arms and expression is stone cold. He seems completely unphased by the fans reaction.
ARQUETTE: “Victor Hades? He used to be a member of The Sedition. Is he the surprise entrant in the Rumble In The Bronx?”
CAAN: “No he couldn't be. Rev and Gladiator said it would be revealed after the Main Event.”
GLADIATOR: “Now I know what you are thinking here, you're thinking that there is no way I can remain impartial as the special enforcer in this match given my past dealings with Hades, and my past rivalries with Pants. Let me tell you, here on Rampage, the past means nothing. My relationship with Victor Hades is no different than my relationship with any other member of the Rampage roster. As for my supposed rivalry with Pants, I assure you that it is simply one big misunderstanding. I have no ill feelings towards Pants, and I intend to be fair and impartial tonight. To further prove my fairness, I'm going to give our faithful referee Sylvain Grenier the match off. Go back and have a coffee Sylvain, it's on me.”
Gladiator hands Sylvain some change for the vending machine. Sylvain walks away and Gladiator removes his suit jacket and reveals a striped referee shirt.
GLADIATOR: “In the interest of fairness, I have banned the New Age Legion from the arena tonight. I'm sorry, but I just don't feel that it's right for Pants to have back up and Victor to be all alone out here. I'm simply trying to be fair.”
The fans begin to boo even louder, clearly seeing right through Gladiator's act.
GLADIATOR: “Now, without further delay, I'd like to invite Pants Weatherman down to the ring and let's get this match under way.”
”Everything” by Pillar begins to play and Pence Weatherlight begins to make his way to the ring. He is slightly more reluctant than usual. Pence stops at the ring and looks in at Gladiator and Hades. Pence hesitates to step in the ring.
ARQUETTE: “Pence seems a little more reluctant than usual. He clearly doesn't trust Gladiator when he says he'll be impartial.”
CAAN: “Who could blame him considering the history between him and Gladiator.”
ARQUETTE: “I'm amazed Pence showed up at all, but Pence is a man of honour. He would never back down from a challenge.”
Pence slowly steps into the ring, never taking his eyes off Gladiator, and Hades. The music stops and Gladiator steps to the center of the ring. Gladiator motions for both men to step to the center. Hades immediately steps to the center of the ring. Pence steps forward slowly but surely. As both men are in the middle of the ring, Gladiator motions for the bell. Gladiator steps back and Pence lunges forward at Hades. He quickly lays into him with punches to the head. Gladiator comes from behind and kicks Pence in the back. The kick sends Pence forward towards Hades who catches him and delivers a Belly to Belly Suplex over the top rope. Pence flies over the top rope and hits the concrete.
ARQUETTE: “So much for fair and impartial. That sure went out the window fast.”
Hades climbs to the outside. He picks up a monitor from off the broadcast table. Pence gets up on his knees and Hades raises the monitor up in the air and smashes it over Pence's head. Gladiator steps outside of the ring. Hades lifts Pence up and holds him. Gladiator grabs a steel chair. He swings the chair and cracks Pence in the head with it. Pence drops down to the ground now bleeding from his forehead. Gladiator places the chair on Pence's head and holds it in place. Hades climbs up on the apron. Hades jumps off the apron and stomps down on the chair, crushing Pence's head underneath. Hades picks Pence up. Gladiator reaches under the ring and pulls out a sledgehammer. Hades whips Pence towards Gladiator, and Gladiator hits him in the head with the sledgehammer. Hades climbs up on the apron and pulls Pence up with him. Hades lifts Pence up and Powerbombs him off the apron and through the broadcast table. As Pence lies in the wreckage of what was once a solid table, Gladiator swings the sledgehammer down and hits Pence repeatedly in the ribs.
ARQUETTE: “This isn't even a wrestling match. This is a butchering, plain and simple.”
CAAN: “Yeah, a two on one butchering.”
Hades lifts Pence up and rolls him into the ring. Hades slides into the ring. Gladiator grabs a table and slides it into the ring. Gladiator sets up the table in the middle of the ring. Hades lifts Pence up on his shoulders and climbs up on the top rope. Hades delivers a Super Death Valley Driver off the top rope and drives Pence through the table. Hades covers Pence, and Gladiator gets in place with a very fast count,
1...
2...
3.
CHIRQUI: “Here is your winner, VICTOR HADES!!!”
Gladiator grabs a microphone. Hades lifts Pence up to his knees and holds him by the hair. Gladiator raises the mic.
GLADIATOR: “I warned you. I told you not to mess with The Sedition, but you just couldn't leave it alone. You had to run your mouth off on Brawl and call me out. Listen to me, and listen very carefully Pants. Stay away from Rampage, and stay out of my business. This was simply a warning shot. This is simply a taste of what The Sedition is fully capable of, and it is only a brief glimpse of the carnage that Victor Hades can unleash.”
Gladiator backs away and nails Pence with a punt kick to the head.
GLADIATOR: “Victor, get this fan loving, do-gooder out of your ring. The spotlight here on Rampage belongs to you my friend.”
Hades picks Pence up and tosses him out of the ring. Gladiator steps out of the ring and walks backstage. EMT's rush out to tend to Pence and Hades stands in the ring with his arms raised in the air as the fans boo.
ARQUETTE: “We have just witnessed a savage attack on Pence Weatherlight. Pence wasn't even given a fair chance at fighting back.”
CAAN: “This was The Sedition at their worst. As if facing the beastly Victor Hades isn't a daunting enough task, Pence had to contend with him and Gladiator.”
ARQUETTE: I have a funny feeling this war between The Sedition and The New Age Legion is far from over. If it's not resolved soon, it could develop into a full fledged war between Brawl and Rampage. We'll be right back after this commercial break.
____________________________________
NEXT WEEK ON RAMPAGE
The Return of CAPTAIN INSANITY
____________________________________
NEXT WEEK ON RAMPAGE
The Return of CAPTAIN INSANITY
____________________________________
ARQUETTE: We are back, and how about that? The return of Captain Insanity. Next week here on Rampage.
CAAN: There's a guy with a lot of history with Rev an Gladiator.
ARQUETTE: History going all the way back to the SWA, the wrestling company Rev and Gladiator ran years ago. In fact, I believe that's where Captain Insanity got his start. Could he be the new Rampage star that's entering the Rumble in the Bronx?
CAAN: Probably not. Again, they said they'd be announcing it after the main event.
ARQUETTE: Speaking of which.
*The camera pans up. The crowd is borderline silent as the jagged Barbed Wire Cage is slowly lowered from the rafters. The fully assembled cage stops it's descent just a few feet above top rope level to leave room for the participants entry.*
ARQUETTE: It doesn't get much sicker than this. A 15 foot high cage made entirely of barbed wire.
CAAN: You can bet on one thing. Nobody's gonna dare interfering from the outside.
ARQUETTE: Got that right. Time to clarify the rules. Unlike other cage matches, a win cannot occur by pinfall, or submission, or disqualification. There is no door to walk out. The only way to win this match is to climb all the way up the barbed wire cage, and then climb all the way down again.
CAAN: So unlike other cage matches, whoever loses the most blood will probably be the winner.
ARQUETTE: There's no doubt about that. Whoever has the guts and strength to climb over that thing will definitely lose blood in the process. All 3 of these guys showed us last week that they had what it took to win. That's why they were all chosen for this match in the first place. Only one will climb over that barbed wire cage, and only one will receive the privilege of choosing his spot in the Rumble in the Bronx.
CAAN: Do you ever shut up?
ARQUETTE: Why does everyone keep asking me that?
CAAN: Just throw it to the main event before we go over our time limit.
ARQUETTE: Fine! Here it is at last, the main event of the evening.
°º²l]FNR[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]§§[l²º°''˜¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨˜''°º²l]2010[l²º°
BARBED WIRE CAGE MATCH
"Tropical Tornado" Ianzky
-vs-
French Montana
-vs-
Kip Kutler
BARBED WIRE CAGE MATCH
"Tropical Tornado" Ianzky
-vs-
French Montana
-vs-
Kip Kutler
CHIRQUI: “The following contest, is our main event of the evening, and is a special Barbed Wire Cage match!
Entering first, from Manila, Phillipines,
Standing 5 feet and 10 inches tall,
Weighing in at 170 lbs,
He is the Tornado from the Far East,
The one and only Ianzky “The Tropical Tornado!”
We hear the whistling intro of the theme song (Wind of Change) then the beat gradually beats faster, and Pyros explode. The tropical tornado appears and runs to the ring. He climbs the ring post, arms stretched wide open sideward, then both hands points the audience. Ianzky does a backflip, landing to the middle of the ring. He repeats the same guesture as he climb the opposite ring post.
CHIRQUI: “Introducing next, hailing from Newark, New Jersey
Standing 6 feet and 3 inches tall,
Weighing in at 230 lbs,
Here is the front man for “Cocaine Revolution”
French Montana!”
The unmistakable screeching sound of electric guitars from "D'you Know What I Mean" by Oasis hits the speakers as the lights dim to dark... The fans rise to their feet in a HUGE mixed reaction. The snare pops from the music and the lights turn to a gray and black mixture as the television camera goes to complete black and white. As the music continues, out steps the man know as French Montana. Several fireworks and exploding devices continuously set off for a 10 second period. The loud noise causes some of the fans to cover and plug their ears. The music continues as Montana casually walks down the ramp with a swagger of an invincible man. His look is careless as he rarely acknowledges a fan except to stare an chuckle at their sneers. His true fans sing along with the music as Montana slowly and methodically works his way to the ring. Never seeming in a rush as he reaches the steps of the ring, he slowly looks to the sky, points and mumbles something to himself... Then in one leap hits the top turnbuckle to cause yet another 10 second round of fireworks and exploding devices to set off... Slyly he confidently poses his chiseled frame to a chorus of cheers and boos from the crowd as they know French Montana has entered the ring.
CHIRQUI: “And their opponent,
From Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Standing at a height of 6 feet and 3 inches,
And weighing 280 lbs,
This is Kip Kutler!”
"Stricken" by Disturbed blares throughout the arena as the fans begin booing as Kip Kutler appears at the top of the stage. He looks one direction then the other and crosses his arm out in the form of a cross and flex's. Kip makes his way down the ramp and rolls into the ring. A spotlight shines down on top of him in the centre of the ring. He drops to one knee and raises his arms up and flex's. He heads to the corner and climbs to the second rope and flex's again as he mocks the fans as they boo.
CAAN: Brace yourselves, gentlemen. This is about to get ugly.
The hideous looking Barbed Wire Cage is now lowered the final few feet. It fits perfectly around the ring posts and ropes. The cables attached to the top are retracted and some stage hands wearing protective gloves secure the cage in place. A referee on the outside calls for the bell and the match begins.
French Montana makes the first move by lunging at Tropical Tornado. They lock up and Tornado places French in a headlock. French breaks free and shoves Tornado forward. He comes within an inch of the jagged cage wall and stops on a dime. Tornado spins around and finds French right in front of him. French locks up again with Tornado. Tornado places French in a headlock. French tries to break loose so Tornado improvises and spins around to place French in a Full Nelson from behind. As he applies pressure, French bends his knees while in the hold and Hip tosses Tornado over. Tornado lands on his feet and reaches back to grab French's arm. He pulls him forward with an Arm Drag and French lands on his side. Tornado applies some pressure to French's shoulder. French sommersaults to break free from the Arm Drag. He grips both hands on Tornado's shoulders, leans back and using his feet against Tornado's chest, delivers a Monkey Flip that sends Tornado head over heels flying through the air, but Tornado miraculously lands on his feet and maintains his balance. French stands up and Tornado performs a standing Moonsault. French starts to fall backwards as he's hit by it, but he keeps his balance and locks his hands around Tornado's torso. French brings him down head first with a Tombstone Piledriver.
ARQUETTE: Great series of reversals there by both men.
CAAN: Too bad they're wasting all that effort on each other. What's Kip Kutler doing over there? Taking a nap?
Kip Kutler is indeed standing in the corner yawning. He stares at French and Tornado in the center of the ring. As French applies a Chin Lock, Kutler stares and applauds the move. As Tornado drops on his belly, spins around and manages to apply an Ankle Lock, Kutler again smiles and applauds his move.
ARQUETTE: He seems to have woken up from his nap and is now just another casual crowd member.
CAAN: If he were smart he'd stay out of the way until Tropical Tornado and French Montana kill each other.
Tornado applies more pressure to the ankle lock, but French breaks it by freeing his other leg and kicking him in the mouth. French stands on his feet and limps across the ring. He takes a second to rest his ankle and Tornado stands up. The two men exchange punches in the center of the ring. Kip Kutler keeps cheering them on arrogantly until both Tornado and French notice him. They stop attacking each other and turn to Kulter, who has now stopped cheering and is looking worried. Tornado rushes forward and hits Kutler with a Dropkic, sending Kutler backing right against the Barbed Wire cage. Kutler screams as the barbed wire digs into his back. He falls forward and is caught by French Montana, who scoops him up in a Bodyslam, pressing his body against the side of the cage repeatedly. He lets go of Kutler, who due to the fact that the barbed wire caught on the back of his clothes, is hanging upside down. Tornado bounces off the ropes on the far side and charges forward, sliding across the mat feet first and nailing Kutler with a Baseball Slide to the head. French boots Kutler several times to the gut and Kutler finally falls, the barbed wire ripping his shirt in two.[/color]
ARQUETTE: I thought for sure Kutler's under the radar strategy would have worked.
CAAN: It didn't work for your acting career, why would it work for Kutler?
ARQUETTE: Hey, my acting career isn't under the radar.
CAAN: Right. Off the radar.
ARQUETTE: It's not off the radar either.
CAAN: David, I'm trying to save you the embrarrassment of using the term "unemployed" but you leave me no choice.
French Montana climbs on top of Kutler and starts unloading a fury of rights and lefts. While he's preoccupied doing this, Tropical Tornado grabs the ripped fabric from Kutler's shirt from off the barbed wire cage. He tears the fabric into two pieces and wraps it around his hands. Tornado starts carefully climbing up the side of the cage, using the fabric to protect his hands from being sliced by the barbed wire. Tropical Tornado makes it almost half way up the cage before French notices him. He quickly climbs off of Kutler and rushes over to Tornado.
ARQUETTE: That's the problem with Triple Threat matches. It's too easy to lose track of everyone. All it takes is to lose your attention for 5 seconds and it could be too late.
As Tornado climbs higher French reaches his hands high up and stands on his toes to try and reach him, but he's just an inch too short. French tries jumping and reaching, but he's still short. As Tornado keeps climbing, French heads to the corner and climbs to the top rope. He very carefully walks across the top rope, trying hard to balance while not touching the barbed wire. He tight rope walks to a spot where Tornado is directly above him. French reaches up and grabs Tornado by the knees. He places his feet in between barbed wire bars and uses his hands to climb up using Tornado's body. Tornado stops climbing and is clinging tightly to the barbed wire. It's obviously cutting through the shirt fabric now, as his face shows signs of pain. French has managed to climb all the way up to the same height as Tornado by climbing up his opponent's body. French wraps his arms around Tornado's neck and spins around. They're back to back hanging from the side of the cage. French jerks their bodies forward and they fall from the side of the cage all the way down to the mat. French pulls Tornado into a Falling Neckbreaker on the way down. Their bodies literally bounce a foot in the air after impact.
ARQUETTE: Holy eight legged freaks!
Tornado and French are both out cold in the center of the ring. After a solid 10 second standing ovation from the fans, Kip Kutler suddenly rises to his feet looking very dizzy. The fans start to boo as Kutler stands over French and Tornado's bodies, taking an arrogant bow as if he's the one who laid them out. Kutler turns back and walks towards the cage wall. He places both hands over the barbed wire and starts to climb up, wincing with each step he takes up the side. Tiny drops of blood fall from his sliced up hands as he makes his way up.
CAAN: That incredible fall French Montana and Tropical Tornado just had may have cost them both the match. "Off the Radar" Kip Kutler is making his way to the top.
As Kip painfully passes the half way mark up the cage, a strange occurence happens outside the ring. The referee observing the match suddenly falls flat on his back. As the camera tilts down, a pair of hands can be seen dragging the referee under the ring by his ankles.
ARQUETTE: Did you just see that?
CAAN: It looked like someone pulled the ref underneath the ring?
ARQUETTE: Betcha it was trolls.
CAAN: There's no such things as trolls you moron.
30 seconds later, a man emerges from under the ring, buttoning up the striped referee shirt, only it's not the referee. It's Pusher, side kick to French Montana!
ARQUETTE: Get that guy out of there! Pusher's not a wrestler, and not part of this match!
CAAN: I think he's just there to cheer French on. Nothing more than that.
ARQUETTE: Yeah, that's why he knocked out a ref and stole his wardrobe.
Pusher finishes buttoning up his shirt and he bends down, pulling a black bag out from under the ring. From inside the bag he pulls out a pair of heavy work gloves and a rope. Pusher puts the gloves on first and grips the barbed wire from the opposite side Kutler's climbing. Pusher violently shakes the cage, causing the flesh on Kutler's hands to literally be torn as he falls off the side and crashes down on the mat. French gets up and staggers over to the. A bloody Tropical Tornado uses the ropes to oull himself up. French stands near the cage and whispers to Pusher on the other side. Pusher passes him the rope through the thin wire cage. Tornado sees this and dives at French, but French drops and ties his legs up with Tornado's, delivering a Drop Toe Hold, sending Tornado falling face first against the cage. The barbed wire scrapes his face as he falls down. French picks Tornado and whips him face first against the cage. He keeps Tornado's body pressed against the barbed wire, feeds the rope through the cage, and ties Tornado's body to it. Tornado tries squirming to free himself, but both his arms and head are bound to the barbed wire. Blood trickles down his neck and chest.
CAAN: I knew it was gonna get ugly, but this is insane.
ARQUETTE: This is like something out of a Saw movie.
French goes back to Pusher. Pusher tries slipping the gloves through the cage, but there's no room. Pusher looks up and tells French that he's gonna try tossing the gloves over the cage. French and Pusher both back up. Pusher tosses the gloves up, but it comes up short by a few feet and doesn't clear the top of the cage. Pusher picks the gloves up off the ground and tries again, but again he misses.
ARQUETTE: If French Montana gets his hands on those gloves, that'll all but guarantee him a win. He'll have no problem at all scaling the barbed wire if his hands are protected.
One more time Pusher winds up, gets ready to throw the gloves and tosses, but just as he throws them, he's hit from behind by a man. Pusher goes down and the attacking man starts hitting him with elbow drops. It's Dee Jae Stormy!
CAAN: Looks like Tropical Tornado has a friend on the outside as well.
Pusher and Dee Jae roll around grappling with each other outside. In the ring, French realizes he's not gonna get a hold of the gloves, and he bites his tonge, getting ready to climb the barbed wire unprotected. As he takes his first few steps up, Tropical Tornado uses part of the barbed wire to cut the rope. He rubs it back and forth until the rope slices and he can pull his body free. Tornado starts to run toward French, but the loss of blood has clearly weakened him. French gets just higher than the ropes when Tornado reaches him. Tornado jumps up and balances on the top rope, wrapping his arm around French's body and delivers a German Suplex all the way from the top rope down to the ground. Both men are motionless lying next to Kutler. The mat is half smeared with blood stains now. The fans are on their feet cheering as Tropical Tornado stands up and makes his way to the cage. He starts to climb up, with each grasp and step screaming in agony as the wire cuts into his skin.
ARQUETTE: Let's just hope Tropial Tornado can stay conscious long enough to climb over.
As Tornado keeps making his way up, French Montana crawls across the mat and is just behind. Tornado being more injured is slower going up the cage. By the time they're within a few feet of the top both are screaming in pain. They're side by side. Tornado swings one leg over first. He pulls his body over the barbed wire top. French follows just second behind. Both men are on top of the cage. They exchange punches briefly, sending drops of blood flying into the audience far below. French swings his entire body over the side of the cage, getting ready to climb down the other side. In response to this, Tornado manages to actually stand up on the thin metal frame 15 feet high in the air. He looks like he's ready to jump.
ARQUETTE: It looks like Tropical Tornado is gonna jump from the top of the cage to beat French Montana down! But what's gonna break his fall?
CAAN: Uh uh. I think we are. Lets get out of here!
David Arquette and Scott Caan both dive out of their seats as Tropical Tornado makes the leap from the top of the cage....
His body falls forward....
However, Tornado's boot laces catch on the barbed wire. His body turns upside down and slams against the side of the cage, his foot attached to the top. French looks up and smiles. He climbs down and his feet touch the floor.
Winner:
French Montana
French Montana collapses in exhaustion. Pusher breaks free from his brawl with Dee Jae Stormy and picks French up. They celebrate his glorious victory outside of the ring. French raises his bloody hands high in the air to a mixed response of boos and cheers from the fans. As he savors his win, his theme music is cut off by the always recognizable beat of “The Imperial March” theme music of The Sedition. The boos from the crowd intensify as Rev and Gladiator appear at the top of the entrance ramp. French staggers his way to the bottom of the ramp, still dripping in blood and throws his arms up in the air. Rev and Gladiator each hold a microphone. They prepare to speak as the music fades out.*
REV: Good job, Frenchy!
GLADIATOR: Fantastic! You've done Friday Night Rampage proud tonight. Nothing pleases us more than someone willing to put their body on the line for the sake of OUR pay cheque. We trust that you'll make a wise choice when you pick your spot in the Rumble in the Bronx. Nothing means more to us than a Rampage star winning the Rumble. You've just shot to the front of the pack in contenders to win it all.
REV: Actually, I wouldn't say you're the front of the pack. You see, we promised that by the end of the night a major announcement would be made regarding Rampage's representation in the Rumble. It has come to our attention that even with an impressive win like you just had, there's still someone on the Rampage roster more talented, more extreme, more capable of winning the whole thing.
GLADIATOR: It is our pleasure to introduce all you fans, as well as Frenchy here, to the newest competitors to enter the Rumble in the Bronx.
*Rev and Gladiator step behind the curtain. The fans wait silently. Suddenly, “The Imperial March” begins to play again, and Rev and Gladiator step right back out again, smiling and waving to all the fans.*
REV: That's right. It's been a year since Gladiator and I have been in action, we figure now's a better time than ever to lace up the boots again. Frenchy, Ianzky, Kutler (if you're still breathng in there, you guys have got some competition come Rumble in the Bronx. We'll see you on the 31st.
*French Montana, and the fans all shake their heads in frustration as Rev and Gladiator continue to smile and wave. The show fades to black.*
RECAP
Ty Luca defeats Bruce Danger (match written by Gladiator)
Bryce Bridges defeats Busaiku Maya (match written by Captain Insanity)
Mike Thunder defeats Danielle Deathstrike (match written by Haven's Outlaw)
Victor Hades defeats Pence Weatherlight (match written by Gladiator)
French Montana defeats Tropical Tornado and Kip Kutler (match written by The Rev)