Post by Kid Cactus on Sept 1, 2005 22:57:03 GMT -6
(NOTICE: This event is in no way a SWA event, or near the same level as a SWA event. This was an event created around the gimmick of Kid Cactus's favorite efed besides the EwC. This is an EwC event and only an EwC event.)
***An EwC logo flashes across the screen, but as it does the logo flashes a bit and if you looked good enough, you could swear you just saw a logo for another former wrestling promotion. The logo then fades out into a black screen. All the sudden some promo music starts to play and a montage of wrestling scenes from EwC’s past begins to play. ***
Voice: In it’s time, EwC was the greatest of feeds. Many greats have come through this federation; Mystery Man, Biohazard, Nightmare, Mr. Mahoney, The Rob, Widowmaker, and even President BigMac. However, as EwC continued to make legends, another fed was rising.
***The promo now switches over to some more hardcore music and the montage switches over to a montage of a wrestling federation known simply as the SWA. ***
Voice: The Sedition of the EwC decided it was time for a change and created the SWA, the federation that would always oppose the EwC. And as time went by, they made their presence known.
***The montage starts showing many brutal clips from the SWA, including the “Bus Going 50 Miles Per Hour” match, the SWA Championship match under dangerous powerlines with Rat Fink defeating Mephesto Carter, and even the “Loser Gets Grouped By Rosie O’Donald” matches between Captain Insanity and Nightstalker. ***
Voice: …legends were made…
***Clips are now showing that of Kevon Matthews, Kid Cactus, Rat Fink, Hardcore Hobo, The Prophet, Scaramanga, Sgt. Sledgehammer, and Gravin Storm. The screen then fades to black, but the voice speaks again***
Voice: That era is now over, but for one night only that era returns…bwahahahaha…
***As the scene now fades in, we see Vice President Kid Cactus standing in his office talking into a paper towel tube to change his voice (it was him speaking the whole time. There is a knock at his door, in which snaps Kid Cactus out of his playful mood, throws the tube behind him, straightens out his suit, then starts too look busy at his desk. ***
Kid Cactus: Come in.
***The door opens and in walks a secretary. She can be describe as the typical stereotype of a secretary (mostly because I’m too lazy to describe anyone in depth). She has her hair tied back in a ponytail, and wears a pair of glasses with a thick rim. She is also wearing a regular business suit as she walks up to Kid Cactus’s desk with a letter. ***
Secretary: This letter just came for you sir. It was labled “urgent”.
Kid Cactus: Death threat or other?
Secretary: Death threat sir.
Kid Cactus: Ah-ha! I knew you’ve been reading my mail!
Secretary: No sir. It’s just that you always get death threats.
Kid Cactus: Oh…well I guess that’s a valid point. Well hand it over.
***The secretary hands over to Kid Cactus the letter. Kid Cactus is about to start reading the letter, when he notices the secretary still standing in front of his desk. ***
Kid Cactus: Why are you still here?
Secretary: My job is SO boring.
Kid Cactus: Well I didn’t choose it for you. Go make a paperclip necklace or something, That will keep ya entertained. ***sigh***
***The secretary slowly walks always with sadness on her face as Kid Cactus goes to the letter. He takes it out of the envelope and starts to read it. ***
Dear Kid Cactus,
We would like to inform you that we have heard of your One Night Encounter show and have noticed the similarities between that and of SWA’s Wednesday Night Encounter show. Well was wanted to warn you that if in anyway we feel that you are ripping off the SWA or trying to play it off as an SWA show, we will slit your through, cut off your testicals, pull out your intestance, and staple your eyelids open and force you to watch every episode of the Anna Nicole Show. Also, if you anger us enough, we may even decide to sue you as well.
Best Wishes,
The Sedition
Kid Cactus: Hmm…well that doesn’t sound good. Oh well, while I wanted to hold an SWA like show, I don’t think we will in any way get confused with them.
***All the sudden, Kid Cactus’s intercom comes on with his secretary at the other end. ***
Secretary: Sir, Joe Aiello and Skippy Mohophosite are ready as announcers for tonight, the SWA rematch between “Dark Angel” Michael Saint and Lex Luther is ready, the special stipulation you placed on the rookie match to give the SWA feel is a go, and the special guests for tonight are all ready to make any appearances.
Kid Cactus: …aw crap!
***With that said, the scene soon fades out and we are now looking into the arena for EwC’s One Night Encounter. We look around the arena where we see many sights such as “Feel the Force”, “Make an Impact”, “Retiring is so Hard To Do”, and “SWA Ripoff”. As we pan around the hot crowd in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada, we are soon looking at the commentating desk with tonight’s announcers; Joe Aiello and Skippy Mohophosite. ***
Joe Aiello: Well folks, we’re here tonight with the EwC supercard “One Night Encounter” which is being broadcasted on public television because Kid Cactus doesn’t know how to make Pay Per Views. Also you may have recognized me as the new commentator for Monday Night Brawl. Well for one night, I return to my position on Wednesday with a man I thought I’d never see again…Skippy Mohophosite.
Skippy Mohophosite: Thanks Joe, and I’m glad to hear that you’re glad to be working with me again.
Joe Aiello: What? I never said that! Working with you has been one of the more horrifying and criminal times I’ve ever spent as a wrestling commentator.
Skippy Mohophosite: Criminal?
Joe Aiello: Yes, criminal! That’s what I call it when someone buys the exclusive rights to my very soul, tourture me on a daily basis, and chained to my desk.
Skippy Mohophosite: Yea…good times…good times…
Joe Aiello: Well at least this is the EwC tonight and I won’t be going though the same humiliation I went through there.
Skippy Mohophosite: What are you talking about. Kid Cactus wanted a show that would give the SWA feel, and that’s what he’s going to get.
Joe Aiello: Well I like to see you tried, because here I can leave at any time I want.
Skippy Mohophosite: That’s what you think Mr. SuperGluedToTheChair.
Joe Aiello: What?
***Joe tries to move from the chair but finds that he is stuck to the spot. ***
Joe Aiello: What the hell!?! I cant move from my seat!
Skippy Mohophosite: That’s right Joe, so tonight we relive an era.
***With that said, Skippy pulls out a large bag which roles out on the desk. T carried tazers, knifes, blunt objects and even a mace (the long jagged ball version ). ***
Joe Aiello: OMG! Where did you get all that from!
Skippy Mohophosite: The last girl I was with was a bit kinky. She left it over my house.
Joe Aiello: And what did she use the mace for?
Skippy Mohophosite: ***Tsk, tsk*** Joe, I see you’ve never been with a domamatrix before, have you. You see Joe, it’s a good thing we managed to team up again…there is still so much I must teach you.
Joe Aiello: Sorry Skippy, but I fear the dark and extremely weird side of the force.
Skippy Mohophosite: Come on Joe, it has great benefits.
Joe Aiello: Well either way, this show now need to move on…and get the hell over with. So here folks is tonights card.
SPECIAL SWA STIPULATION:
Cameron Hayden vs. High Voltage
SWA MATCH:
Lex Luther vs. “Dark Angel” Michael Saint
LIGHTS OUT MATCH:
Ebon vs. Shawn Orka
MIXED-PROMOTION TAG TEAM MATCH:
Dreadnaught & Blade vs. D-Fuzed & Soldier X
SWA CHALLENGE MATCH:
To Be Announced…
MAIN EVENT BATTLE ROYAL FOR #1 CONTENDERSHIP OF THE HCW CHAMPIONSHIP:
Everyone
Joe Aiello: And that’s it folks. God have mercy on MY soul!
TO BE CONTINUED…
***An EwC logo flashes across the screen, but as it does the logo flashes a bit and if you looked good enough, you could swear you just saw a logo for another former wrestling promotion. The logo then fades out into a black screen. All the sudden some promo music starts to play and a montage of wrestling scenes from EwC’s past begins to play. ***
Voice: In it’s time, EwC was the greatest of feeds. Many greats have come through this federation; Mystery Man, Biohazard, Nightmare, Mr. Mahoney, The Rob, Widowmaker, and even President BigMac. However, as EwC continued to make legends, another fed was rising.
***The promo now switches over to some more hardcore music and the montage switches over to a montage of a wrestling federation known simply as the SWA. ***
Voice: The Sedition of the EwC decided it was time for a change and created the SWA, the federation that would always oppose the EwC. And as time went by, they made their presence known.
***The montage starts showing many brutal clips from the SWA, including the “Bus Going 50 Miles Per Hour” match, the SWA Championship match under dangerous powerlines with Rat Fink defeating Mephesto Carter, and even the “Loser Gets Grouped By Rosie O’Donald” matches between Captain Insanity and Nightstalker. ***
Voice: …legends were made…
***Clips are now showing that of Kevon Matthews, Kid Cactus, Rat Fink, Hardcore Hobo, The Prophet, Scaramanga, Sgt. Sledgehammer, and Gravin Storm. The screen then fades to black, but the voice speaks again***
Voice: That era is now over, but for one night only that era returns…bwahahahaha…
***As the scene now fades in, we see Vice President Kid Cactus standing in his office talking into a paper towel tube to change his voice (it was him speaking the whole time. There is a knock at his door, in which snaps Kid Cactus out of his playful mood, throws the tube behind him, straightens out his suit, then starts too look busy at his desk. ***
Kid Cactus: Come in.
***The door opens and in walks a secretary. She can be describe as the typical stereotype of a secretary (mostly because I’m too lazy to describe anyone in depth). She has her hair tied back in a ponytail, and wears a pair of glasses with a thick rim. She is also wearing a regular business suit as she walks up to Kid Cactus’s desk with a letter. ***
Secretary: This letter just came for you sir. It was labled “urgent”.
Kid Cactus: Death threat or other?
Secretary: Death threat sir.
Kid Cactus: Ah-ha! I knew you’ve been reading my mail!
Secretary: No sir. It’s just that you always get death threats.
Kid Cactus: Oh…well I guess that’s a valid point. Well hand it over.
***The secretary hands over to Kid Cactus the letter. Kid Cactus is about to start reading the letter, when he notices the secretary still standing in front of his desk. ***
Kid Cactus: Why are you still here?
Secretary: My job is SO boring.
Kid Cactus: Well I didn’t choose it for you. Go make a paperclip necklace or something, That will keep ya entertained. ***sigh***
***The secretary slowly walks always with sadness on her face as Kid Cactus goes to the letter. He takes it out of the envelope and starts to read it. ***
Dear Kid Cactus,
We would like to inform you that we have heard of your One Night Encounter show and have noticed the similarities between that and of SWA’s Wednesday Night Encounter show. Well was wanted to warn you that if in anyway we feel that you are ripping off the SWA or trying to play it off as an SWA show, we will slit your through, cut off your testicals, pull out your intestance, and staple your eyelids open and force you to watch every episode of the Anna Nicole Show. Also, if you anger us enough, we may even decide to sue you as well.
Best Wishes,
The Sedition
Kid Cactus: Hmm…well that doesn’t sound good. Oh well, while I wanted to hold an SWA like show, I don’t think we will in any way get confused with them.
***All the sudden, Kid Cactus’s intercom comes on with his secretary at the other end. ***
Secretary: Sir, Joe Aiello and Skippy Mohophosite are ready as announcers for tonight, the SWA rematch between “Dark Angel” Michael Saint and Lex Luther is ready, the special stipulation you placed on the rookie match to give the SWA feel is a go, and the special guests for tonight are all ready to make any appearances.
Kid Cactus: …aw crap!
***With that said, the scene soon fades out and we are now looking into the arena for EwC’s One Night Encounter. We look around the arena where we see many sights such as “Feel the Force”, “Make an Impact”, “Retiring is so Hard To Do”, and “SWA Ripoff”. As we pan around the hot crowd in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada, we are soon looking at the commentating desk with tonight’s announcers; Joe Aiello and Skippy Mohophosite. ***
Joe Aiello: Well folks, we’re here tonight with the EwC supercard “One Night Encounter” which is being broadcasted on public television because Kid Cactus doesn’t know how to make Pay Per Views. Also you may have recognized me as the new commentator for Monday Night Brawl. Well for one night, I return to my position on Wednesday with a man I thought I’d never see again…Skippy Mohophosite.
Skippy Mohophosite: Thanks Joe, and I’m glad to hear that you’re glad to be working with me again.
Joe Aiello: What? I never said that! Working with you has been one of the more horrifying and criminal times I’ve ever spent as a wrestling commentator.
Skippy Mohophosite: Criminal?
Joe Aiello: Yes, criminal! That’s what I call it when someone buys the exclusive rights to my very soul, tourture me on a daily basis, and chained to my desk.
Skippy Mohophosite: Yea…good times…good times…
Joe Aiello: Well at least this is the EwC tonight and I won’t be going though the same humiliation I went through there.
Skippy Mohophosite: What are you talking about. Kid Cactus wanted a show that would give the SWA feel, and that’s what he’s going to get.
Joe Aiello: Well I like to see you tried, because here I can leave at any time I want.
Skippy Mohophosite: That’s what you think Mr. SuperGluedToTheChair.
Joe Aiello: What?
***Joe tries to move from the chair but finds that he is stuck to the spot. ***
Joe Aiello: What the hell!?! I cant move from my seat!
Skippy Mohophosite: That’s right Joe, so tonight we relive an era.
***With that said, Skippy pulls out a large bag which roles out on the desk. T carried tazers, knifes, blunt objects and even a mace (the long jagged ball version ). ***
Joe Aiello: OMG! Where did you get all that from!
Skippy Mohophosite: The last girl I was with was a bit kinky. She left it over my house.
Joe Aiello: And what did she use the mace for?
Skippy Mohophosite: ***Tsk, tsk*** Joe, I see you’ve never been with a domamatrix before, have you. You see Joe, it’s a good thing we managed to team up again…there is still so much I must teach you.
Joe Aiello: Sorry Skippy, but I fear the dark and extremely weird side of the force.
Skippy Mohophosite: Come on Joe, it has great benefits.
Joe Aiello: Well either way, this show now need to move on…and get the hell over with. So here folks is tonights card.
SPECIAL SWA STIPULATION:
Cameron Hayden vs. High Voltage
SWA MATCH:
Lex Luther vs. “Dark Angel” Michael Saint
LIGHTS OUT MATCH:
Ebon vs. Shawn Orka
MIXED-PROMOTION TAG TEAM MATCH:
Dreadnaught & Blade vs. D-Fuzed & Soldier X
SWA CHALLENGE MATCH:
To Be Announced…
MAIN EVENT BATTLE ROYAL FOR #1 CONTENDERSHIP OF THE HCW CHAMPIONSHIP:
Everyone
Joe Aiello: And that’s it folks. God have mercy on MY soul!
TO BE CONTINUED…
