Post by President Mac on Oct 19, 2015 22:58:40 GMT -6
WARNING: This live event contains stunts performed by professionals or under the supervision of professionals and maybe unsuitable for younger viewers. Accordingly EWC and it's producers must insist that no one attempt to recreate or re-enact any stunt or activity performed in this live event.
The Extreme Wrestling Corporation presents
OCTOBER 19TH 2015
Monday Night Brawl is a professional wrestling television program for Extreme Wrestling Corporation (EWC) that currently airs on ESPN, Spike, SkySports, huluPLUS and TSN2 in Canada. The shows name, which is sometimes stylized as MNB, is also used to refer to the Brawl brand, in which EWC employees are assigned to work and perform on that program. The show originally debuted in North America on the CTV & ESPN Network on April 7,1997. It remained there for a number of years until Brawl was moved to SPIKE TV and SYFY. In 2008, the show was moved to Showtime HD, SciFi HD, SkySports and the new TSN2. Since its launch in 1997, Brawl continues to air on Monday nights. Brawl is generally seen as the company's flagship program due to its longer history, higher ratings, and emphasis on pay-per-views. It is the second longest running weekly episodic television show in history
MONDAY NIGHT BRAWL
EPISODE 439OCTOBER 19TH 2015
Monday Night Brawl is a professional wrestling television program for Extreme Wrestling Corporation (EWC) that currently airs on ESPN, Spike, SkySports, huluPLUS and TSN2 in Canada. The shows name, which is sometimes stylized as MNB, is also used to refer to the Brawl brand, in which EWC employees are assigned to work and perform on that program. The show originally debuted in North America on the CTV & ESPN Network on April 7,1997. It remained there for a number of years until Brawl was moved to SPIKE TV and SYFY. In 2008, the show was moved to Showtime HD, SciFi HD, SkySports and the new TSN2. Since its launch in 1997, Brawl continues to air on Monday nights. Brawl is generally seen as the company's flagship program due to its longer history, higher ratings, and emphasis on pay-per-views. It is the second longest running weekly episodic television show in history
Live from the Target Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota
EWC BRAWL
October 19th 2015
Live from the Target Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Joe Aiello & Jeremy Piven
Announcer: Jessica Stroup
Senior Referee: Paul Turner
Referee: Josh Daniels
Backstage Interviewer: Ace Heart
"Follow" by Breaking Benjamin blasts in the Stadium.
The show starts off with video footage detailing historic events over Monday Night Brawls Eighteen year history. From episode 001 all the way down to episode 438.
Images of previous EWC Champions are shown, starting with the very first Champion Black Ninja, then moving onto Big Mac and Steve Bennett. Sped up footage then shows a special montage of Memphis Reigns, Shadow Man, Hirsh Valentine, Jesse Nunez, Hurricane Jeff, Moses Lake, James Chambers, BDC, Jay Cee, Stray, Gladiator and then The Rev all with the World Championship. Sped up footage again then takes us through to Xplode, Nathan Creed, Metal Black, Living Dead Karl, Brett Black, Shawn Cage, King Flip, Slade Hardison, Emma Louise, Sabriynn Cassidy, Xaiver Reid and Jon Kellar
This is followed by highlights of showcasing Monday Night Brawl Champions: Kurt Newman, Shadow Man and Xplode
There is a pause as the video package splits in half, one half dedicated to Memphis Reigns & the other half dedicated to MadDawg with the final wording ..
"In Loving Memory ... We will never forget"
The opening pyros hit and here we go.
The energy in the Sleep Train Arena in Sacramento, California is electrifying.
Spotlights circle around the arena as the thousands of fans in the venue are shown in a wide angle shot. The camera then pans out showing a full scale view of the jam packed arena and zooms in on some crazy fans.
A chant begins of
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
MNB
Fireworks blast across the stage as the fans scream in delight. A thick layer of fog circles the arena, and camera flashes repeatedly strobe the area! Another week has passed in the EWC Season and Monday Night Brawl has begun! The camera feed pans to different areas in the arena and we see fans cheering in excitement!
The feed then switches to the announcer’s booth after one last explosion from a pyrotechnic. Joey Aiello is smiling next to Jeremy Piven. Both are dressed in black polo shirts with headsets on their heads as they look towards the viewer. Fans continuously wave as the television feed as Joey Aiello speaks:
Aiello: Hello and welcome to another episode of Monday Night Brawl! After a couple of weeks in California, we are now in the wonderful Target Center here in Minneapolis Minnesota.
Piven: Traded in the sun for ... the Mall of America. Wonderful
Aiello: Wonderful could be used to describe our show here to...
The lights dim.
The TitanTron flickers on.
The letters P R E S I D E N T M A C flash across the screen.
The thousands in attendance jump to there feet in excitement and start pounding there feet on the ground and clapping there hands creating the sound:
BoomBoom CLAP!
BoomBoom CLAP!
BoomBoom CLAP!
Coming Undone by Korn now begins to blast over the P.A
Aiello: Another week and another interruption, it looks like our President is making his way down to the ring here tonight
Piven: I can't tell if he's annoyed, concerned or simply needs to shit
Pyros explode up and down the entrance Ramp and all around the entrance stage. Once the smoke begins to settle an old-style movie curtain parts at the top of the ramp. Two roving spotlights pan and fix on center. There, President Mac stands, head bowed in his signature sun glasses, arms out-stretched with clenched fists. And as the lyrics kick in, and the fans sing along, Mac clap-clap-stomps toward the ring, slapping hands. At ringside, he takes off his "specs" and gives them to a young fan. Mac pauses in front of the ring and stares out at the capacity crowed chanting his name, he smiles, soaking it all in.
President Mac: Good Evening Minneapolis. I um ... I wish I was out here with some good news, but unfortunately it's not. I would have released this in a press conference at a different time, but we live in a day and age where leaks happen and the media is sniffing at our heals every day
Aiello: Oh my goodness... this doesn't sound good
Piven: He better not be taking another year break, or so help me GOD! I need this job Danny, I NEED this
President Mac: Unfortunately this news is going to come in a group of three here tonight. First, it is with a sad and heavy heart that I am here to announce that Kurt Newman will not be able to compete here in the EWC for the remainder of this Season
Gasps are heard all around the arena ... The arena is suddenly very very silent
President Mac: We have kept this situation very quiet since Rumble in the Bronx, out of respect for Kurt Newman. We had our very best Doctors looking at him, we flew Doctors from all over the world to come in and look at Kurt Newman, but sadly they have deemed Newman unable to compete and surgery on his ankle and possibly knee is now imminent.
Aiello: This is just terrible. We saw him land horribly outside the ring at Rumble in the Bronx, we knew he was in extreme pain and Newman has a history of ankle injuries ... this is ... there are no words ladies and gentleman
Piven: All joking aside, this is a HUGE loss, not just to the EWC but to Wrestling
President Mac: It is my unfortunate duty at this time, to announce that effective immediately, the EWC will be vacating the International Championship
Aiello: My goodness ... what a situation. So close to WrestleFest too
President Mac: It goes without saying that Kurt Newman was and still is a great competitor. He wore the International Championship with pride, and defended the title successfully many times. Newman will go down as one of the greatest to ever hold the International Championship. It is our hope, that one day Kurt Newman will again be able to Wrestle. We will continue to work with him, support him and help him return to the EWC in some capacity in the future.
Piven: This is a really shitty way to start a show
President Mac: This leads me to the Tag Team Championships. As you all know, Kurt Newman is also one half of the Tag Team Champions ... The Dynamic Duo
Many cheers are heard around the arena
Chants of Newman now start up
President Mac: I know for certain, Kurt Newman appreciates that, and can feel your love. Now sadly, at this time, because Kurt Newman is unable to continue on this Season, we are also forced to make the difficult announcement that effective immediately, the Tag Team Championships are also vacated
Aiello: Wait what?
Large rumblings are now heard in the stands, followed by chants of Bull Shit
President Mac: I apologize, however this decision has been made and it's fi...
President Mac looks at the mic but it seems to be turned off. He taps the mic and no sound comes out. Mac calls for a second mic. A man comes running down the ramp with a new mic and hands it to Mac, taking the old one back with him. Mac taps the mic
TAP TAP
President Mac: Sorry about that... technical difficulty... As I was saying, effective im...
Once again the mic goes out. Mac looks around annoyed when suddenly
The lights in the arena slowly begin to dim as everyone in the arena quickly get's to their feet and begin to make some noise. "Invincible" by OK Go then begins to play over the Sound System as three strobe lights begin to pulse in the entrance way, fog then begins to rise from below the stage in front of the entrance.
The X-Treme Tron lights up counting down from 9 all the way to 1. It seems as though every single person is on there feet counting down the numbers. Once it gets to 0 large letters flash “IT'S SHOWTIME”.
An enormous uproar of cheers now blends out the blasting of "Invincible"! A few moments later Shadow Man walks from behind the wall of Fog onto the stage. He stands their for a few seconds with a smirk on his face and begins to point to the fans who are screaming the loudest.
Shadow calms the fans down and starts to speak into the mic
Shadow Man: Now hold on a damn second. I don't give a single Taco about what you are talking about Mister Clean ... People of Minneaplois Minnesota, get loud one more time for my pal KUUUURRRRRRT NEEEEEEEWMAN!!!!!!!
The audience erupts in cheers and start to chant
Shadow Man: Listen here Doctor Evil, I don't know what you and Miter Bigglesworth were doing backstage earlier that got you all in a fluster, but there is no way in hell I am going to standby and allow you to Vacate the Tag Team Championships without a fight
Fans continue to cheer
Shadow Man: My good friend Kurty Kurt is in the middle of a very sexy sponge bath with his wet nurse, and by wet nurse, I mean she gonna need to change them panties. ANY-WAY. While Kurt might not be able to fulfill his half of the Tag Team Championships, I most certainly can
President Mac: Listen here Van Wilder ... the Tag Team Championships cannot be held by a singles competitor alone. They are Championships ... plural. You don't have a Tag Team Partner to share them with, do you? ... Well ... do you?
Shadow Man: Stick a Pacifier in it Mac, I can feel the spit twenty feet away. No, at this present time, I don't have a tag team partner
President Mac: There you go. Like the Green Lantern, you are wrong and I am right. The Tag Team titles are to be vacat...
Shadow Man: Not so fast and furious Howie Mandell. I read up on the rules before coming out here, and by read them... I mean wiped my ass with them after leaving you a little gift on your desk. And by little I mean, I ate a shit-ton of Tacos before and during the mess I left behind. The rules state.. you must give an allotment of time for me to find a new tag team partner
President Mac nods his head in agreement while also looking disgusted
President Mac: Ok Smoking Aces...
Piven: I was the star of that movie ... just saying
President Mac: You got one week. One week to find a partner. This time, next week, Monday Night Brawl... you come out here an announce that you have a partner ... and I won't strip you of the Tag Team Championships. You and your new partner will get a chance to keep them in a match, against the opponents of my choosing. This is if.. you even find someone willing to tag team with you.
Shadow Man: Don't go all Man Apart on me here ... One Week is more than fair ... No matter who you line up for me and my new partner to face, we will be the ones keeping the Tag Team Championships. You can stick that in your pipe and ... shove it up your ass
Shadow Man drops the mic and waves to the fans as he heads to the back
President Mac smiles and tosses the mic to Joe Aiello at the announcers booth
Aiello: Somehow I think this is going to take an ugly turn...
Piven: Anyone else catch all those references? Think about it as we head to commercial break
The TitanTron flickers on.
The letters P R E S I D E N T M A C flash across the screen.
The thousands in attendance jump to there feet in excitement and start pounding there feet on the ground and clapping there hands creating the sound:
BoomBoom CLAP!
BoomBoom CLAP!
BoomBoom CLAP!
Coming Undone by Korn now begins to blast over the P.A
Aiello: Another week and another interruption, it looks like our President is making his way down to the ring here tonight
Piven: I can't tell if he's annoyed, concerned or simply needs to shit
Pyros explode up and down the entrance Ramp and all around the entrance stage. Once the smoke begins to settle an old-style movie curtain parts at the top of the ramp. Two roving spotlights pan and fix on center. There, President Mac stands, head bowed in his signature sun glasses, arms out-stretched with clenched fists. And as the lyrics kick in, and the fans sing along, Mac clap-clap-stomps toward the ring, slapping hands. At ringside, he takes off his "specs" and gives them to a young fan. Mac pauses in front of the ring and stares out at the capacity crowed chanting his name, he smiles, soaking it all in.
President Mac: Good Evening Minneapolis. I um ... I wish I was out here with some good news, but unfortunately it's not. I would have released this in a press conference at a different time, but we live in a day and age where leaks happen and the media is sniffing at our heals every day
Aiello: Oh my goodness... this doesn't sound good
Piven: He better not be taking another year break, or so help me GOD! I need this job Danny, I NEED this
President Mac: Unfortunately this news is going to come in a group of three here tonight. First, it is with a sad and heavy heart that I am here to announce that Kurt Newman will not be able to compete here in the EWC for the remainder of this Season
Gasps are heard all around the arena ... The arena is suddenly very very silent
President Mac: We have kept this situation very quiet since Rumble in the Bronx, out of respect for Kurt Newman. We had our very best Doctors looking at him, we flew Doctors from all over the world to come in and look at Kurt Newman, but sadly they have deemed Newman unable to compete and surgery on his ankle and possibly knee is now imminent.
Aiello: This is just terrible. We saw him land horribly outside the ring at Rumble in the Bronx, we knew he was in extreme pain and Newman has a history of ankle injuries ... this is ... there are no words ladies and gentleman
Piven: All joking aside, this is a HUGE loss, not just to the EWC but to Wrestling
President Mac: It is my unfortunate duty at this time, to announce that effective immediately, the EWC will be vacating the International Championship
Aiello: My goodness ... what a situation. So close to WrestleFest too
President Mac: It goes without saying that Kurt Newman was and still is a great competitor. He wore the International Championship with pride, and defended the title successfully many times. Newman will go down as one of the greatest to ever hold the International Championship. It is our hope, that one day Kurt Newman will again be able to Wrestle. We will continue to work with him, support him and help him return to the EWC in some capacity in the future.
Piven: This is a really shitty way to start a show
President Mac: This leads me to the Tag Team Championships. As you all know, Kurt Newman is also one half of the Tag Team Champions ... The Dynamic Duo
Many cheers are heard around the arena
Chants of Newman now start up
NEWMAN
NEWMAN
NEWMAN
NEWMAN
NEWMAN
NEWMAN
President Mac: I know for certain, Kurt Newman appreciates that, and can feel your love. Now sadly, at this time, because Kurt Newman is unable to continue on this Season, we are also forced to make the difficult announcement that effective immediately, the Tag Team Championships are also vacated
Aiello: Wait what?
Large rumblings are now heard in the stands, followed by chants of Bull Shit
BULL SHIT
BULL SHIT
BULL SHIT
BULL SHIT
President Mac: I apologize, however this decision has been made and it's fi...
President Mac looks at the mic but it seems to be turned off. He taps the mic and no sound comes out. Mac calls for a second mic. A man comes running down the ramp with a new mic and hands it to Mac, taking the old one back with him. Mac taps the mic
TAP TAP
President Mac: Sorry about that... technical difficulty... As I was saying, effective im...
Once again the mic goes out. Mac looks around annoyed when suddenly
The lights in the arena slowly begin to dim as everyone in the arena quickly get's to their feet and begin to make some noise. "Invincible" by OK Go then begins to play over the Sound System as three strobe lights begin to pulse in the entrance way, fog then begins to rise from below the stage in front of the entrance.
The X-Treme Tron lights up counting down from 9 all the way to 1. It seems as though every single person is on there feet counting down the numbers. Once it gets to 0 large letters flash “IT'S SHOWTIME”.
An enormous uproar of cheers now blends out the blasting of "Invincible"! A few moments later Shadow Man walks from behind the wall of Fog onto the stage. He stands their for a few seconds with a smirk on his face and begins to point to the fans who are screaming the loudest.
Shadow calms the fans down and starts to speak into the mic
Shadow Man: Now hold on a damn second. I don't give a single Taco about what you are talking about Mister Clean ... People of Minneaplois Minnesota, get loud one more time for my pal KUUUURRRRRRT NEEEEEEEWMAN!!!!!!!
The audience erupts in cheers and start to chant
NEW-MAN
NEW-MAN
NEW-MAN
NEW-MAN
NEW-MAN
NEW-MAN
Shadow Man: Listen here Doctor Evil, I don't know what you and Miter Bigglesworth were doing backstage earlier that got you all in a fluster, but there is no way in hell I am going to standby and allow you to Vacate the Tag Team Championships without a fight
Fans continue to cheer
Shadow Man: My good friend Kurty Kurt is in the middle of a very sexy sponge bath with his wet nurse, and by wet nurse, I mean she gonna need to change them panties. ANY-WAY. While Kurt might not be able to fulfill his half of the Tag Team Championships, I most certainly can
President Mac: Listen here Van Wilder ... the Tag Team Championships cannot be held by a singles competitor alone. They are Championships ... plural. You don't have a Tag Team Partner to share them with, do you? ... Well ... do you?
Shadow Man: Stick a Pacifier in it Mac, I can feel the spit twenty feet away. No, at this present time, I don't have a tag team partner
President Mac: There you go. Like the Green Lantern, you are wrong and I am right. The Tag Team titles are to be vacat...
Shadow Man: Not so fast and furious Howie Mandell. I read up on the rules before coming out here, and by read them... I mean wiped my ass with them after leaving you a little gift on your desk. And by little I mean, I ate a shit-ton of Tacos before and during the mess I left behind. The rules state.. you must give an allotment of time for me to find a new tag team partner
President Mac nods his head in agreement while also looking disgusted
President Mac: Ok Smoking Aces...
Piven: I was the star of that movie ... just saying
President Mac: You got one week. One week to find a partner. This time, next week, Monday Night Brawl... you come out here an announce that you have a partner ... and I won't strip you of the Tag Team Championships. You and your new partner will get a chance to keep them in a match, against the opponents of my choosing. This is if.. you even find someone willing to tag team with you.
Shadow Man: Don't go all Man Apart on me here ... One Week is more than fair ... No matter who you line up for me and my new partner to face, we will be the ones keeping the Tag Team Championships. You can stick that in your pipe and ... shove it up your ass
Shadow Man drops the mic and waves to the fans as he heads to the back
President Mac smiles and tosses the mic to Joe Aiello at the announcers booth
Aiello: Somehow I think this is going to take an ugly turn...
Piven: Anyone else catch all those references? Think about it as we head to commercial break
EWCTV
WHAT IS EWCTV?
All 9 live EWC pay-per-view events - including StrangleMania, Night Of Champions, Rumble in the Bronx and WrestleFest.
All day scheduled and live programming - Plus, hours and hours of on-demand content & never before seen behind-the-scenes footage!
Groundbreaking original series - See new episodes of BRAWL, RAMPAGE, FSW, NJFC, HCW and more
Live in-ring action, reality shows and documentaries -
HOW TO ORDER
Call your local TV Provider to subscribe. $7.95/month * Taxes extra.
WATCH ONLINE
If you are subscribed to EWC Network through your TV Provider you can now enjoy EWC Network on your PC, laptop, PS3, PS4, or tablet.
EWCTV for only $7.95 USD per month
Along with being an EWCTV Subscriber, you get all Pay-Per-View events included at no extra charge, 10% off any and all EWC Merchandise from the EWC Store, 15% off all tickets to LIVE EWC Shows, and a free EWC Yearly Wall Calendar signed by the entire active EWC Roster
As an added bonus for all those currently subscribed including any new subscriptions prior to midnight SEPTEMBER 30TH 2015, you will get a FREE copy of the Night of Champions XII DVD and Blu-Ray combo when it's released later this year, which also comes with a free T-Shirt and Replica EWC Championship belt.
So act now if you aren't already subscribed to EWCTV
COMMERCIAL BREAK
VOICE: Are you tired of smelling like complete and utter shit? Are you sick not being able to attract the opposite sick?
Hello, I'm Extreme Wrestling Corporations Shadow Man.
Like you, I was once too skinny and too fat.
I once had absolutely no game at all like my colleague Derek Wellings.
Some people called me that big fat skinny kid, or Pepperoni face on account of the all the Pizza I was eating to mask my feelings.
But then things changed for me.
I stumbled across the cutest little animal playing a guitar..
a Pig.
Like you, I was once too skinny and too fat.
I once had absolutely no game at all like my colleague Derek Wellings.
Some people called me that big fat skinny kid, or Pepperoni face on account of the all the Pizza I was eating to mask my feelings.
But then things changed for me.
I stumbled across the cutest little animal playing a guitar..
a Pig.
Isn't he just the CUTEST little fucker you've ever seen?
Look at him strum away
This Pig was so popular, he was banging all the other Pigs on the farm.
In fact he was having Pig Orgies night after night after night
Look at him strum away
This Pig was so popular, he was banging all the other Pigs on the farm.
In fact he was having Pig Orgies night after night after night
That's when I realized something .. and it changed my life for good.
The lady Pigs weren't into the cute little Man Pig for his good looks & guitar playing skills..
No.. they were into him for his smell.
Now I know what your all thinking.. Pigs smell like horse shit.
Yes, it's true.
The lady Pigs weren't into the cute little Man Pig for his good looks & guitar playing skills..
No.. they were into him for his smell.
Now I know what your all thinking.. Pigs smell like horse shit.
Yes, it's true.
That's why I met with a group of scientists to find out more on how we can replicate that great Pig smell, without a hint of Horse Shit.
Turns out.. we only like the smell of Pig after one thing...
Turns out.. we only like the smell of Pig after one thing...
It's the crispy, juicy smell of a Pig we love most.. but not just the whole Pig like in that picture.
What we want.. is Five Letters Long and rhymes with Shmacon
What we want.. is Five Letters Long and rhymes with Shmacon
It's...
That's right boys and girls.. we love BACON don't we?
So the next question is..
How can I smell like bacon all the time so I can have ripped abs and have the oppisite sex doing shots out of my belly button?
So the next question is..
How can I smell like bacon all the time so I can have ripped abs and have the oppisite sex doing shots out of my belly button?
The answer is simple..
BACON is the NEW Unisex Cologne/Perfume that is not only guaranteed to give you the perfect body.. but it will also drive the opposite sex crazy.
Check out what happens after just a small spray of BACON onto either side of my neck
Check out what happens after just a small spray of BACON onto either side of my neck
That's right boys and girls, these women want to lick the absolute shit out of my neck while I use my fingers to "get to know them" better.
So if you are over-weight or skinnier then a pole, try
It's for Men and Women. Results may vary.
Want MORE proof?
OK!
Watch what happens after I spray some BACON on my downstairs friend Mr Henderson
See that kids? She wants to get to know Mr Henderson better!
What are you waiting for? Try BACON today!
DISCLOSURE/WARNING: Bacon results may vary. Each body type is different. You might not night see results over-night or even ever, so just keep trying. If a rash develops, that means its working, keep applying it. If headaches, bleeding nose or nausea occur, don't call the Dr, it's supposed to do that. It just means you aren't applying enough of it on. The body needs to get used to it. In the very rare case you die, you may be entitled for a full refund within the first 30 days. Contact us from the beyond for more details.
DISCLOSURE/WARNING: Bacon results may vary. Each body type is different. You might not night see results over-night or even ever, so just keep trying. If a rash develops, that means its working, keep applying it. If headaches, bleeding nose or nausea occur, don't call the Dr, it's supposed to do that. It just means you aren't applying enough of it on. The body needs to get used to it. In the very rare case you die, you may be entitled for a full refund within the first 30 days. Contact us from the beyond for more details.
RINGSIDE
Suddenly, the lights go out!
Aiello: What the-?!
Piven: Looks like someone forgot to pay the electric bill!
Aiello: No, I'm sure you know what's going on.
The rumbling of thunder is heard. The roars of vicious beasts. Occasional flashes of lightning.
Piven: I think the loss of my sight's made my sense of smell better, because I sure smell something rotten!
Aiello: Oh, God, yeah...
: We're everywhere.The fans begin to boo; the voice accompanying the effects sounds just familiar enough.
: We're in the air your breathe, the things you see out of the corner of your eye, the dreadful thoughts you think, the wicked intentions in your heart. We're the inevitable. We're the conclusion of humanity. We're the dawn of uncreation.Aiello: Can't we get some lights on and shut that PA off?!
Piven: Joey, you act like that'd stop them from talking.
: Struggle, kick and scream, claw at the ground all you like, because all it takes to turn things around for us... is one... small... bite...Aiello: Coming up, one of the members of The Endless Walk will be in action, when Nurse Kinsley squares off against the straight-laced John Kellar. Following that, the source of this whole infectious invasion, Living Dead Karl goes one-on-one with the returning JTC. Last week was a successful one for the active members of that organization, and they're promising another week of wins tonight.
Piven: I like how you think you can just go on with the show as if we're not in the dark with- HOLY SHIT!!!
The sound of someone jumping out of their chair is heard, alongside the sound of headphones dropping to the ground.
Aiello: Piven? Piven?! Jeremy?!?
: Griffin Hawkins, Shelley Silver, you've been two nasty thorns in our side that are due for removal. At Uncensored, one of you will be sacrificed. One of you will be placed on the dark altar and offered to the Elder Gods so Master Charles can be whole once more. Decide. Will it be Adam or Eve to be proffered the poisoned apple? The apple of unenlightenment. Will the three moons choose for you? No matter. Tonight, another taste of what the good doctor and our dear Charles are capable of. Be afraid... be very... afraid afraid afraidAnd with that, the sounds all die out, as the lights fade back on. Aiello's looking around frantically for Piven, who's actually just inside the ring, wielding a chair and looking very paranoid.
Aiello: Piven?! What're you doing?!
Piven, seeing that the coast is clear, sheepishly exits the ring. He's still looking around for someone, though.
Aiello: What happened?!
Piven: I felt someone touch me, Joey! I'm not sticking around for that!
Aiello just shakes his head.
Aiello: You scared me half to death, you idiot!
Piven: Hey, you'd bolt too if you thought Living Dead Karl was coming for you!
Aiello: Anyway, maybe we can get back to the action, now that order's been restored, no thanks to The Endless Walk.
Piven: I wonder why he never came after you. You're the one always talking bad about those guys!
Aiello just glares at Piven, as they prepare for the opening match
SHOW OPENER
NAIROBI JORDAN Vs MARSHALL YOUNG
Jessica Stroup: Our opening match is scheduled for one fall!
Headed to the ring first, from Death Valley, California... Nairobi Jordan!
"The Phoenix" hits the sound systems of the arena. Flames shoot up from stage The Phoenix jumps through the smoke that was left behind. He makes goggles out of his hands to shield his eyes from the lights and looks out to the crowd. He points to a fan holding his sign. Slapping fans' hands on his way to the ring. He walks up the ring steps and steps on the apron. He dusts his boots off on the apron. Does a prayer motion then spreads his arms apart as he enters the ring.
Jessica Stroup: And his opponent, from Memphis, Tennessee... Marshall Young!
"Wings of Feather and Wax" hits the speakers as the lights in the arena dim. Marshall Young steps out on the stage and looks out over the crowd before slowly raising both arms into the air. He then slowly walks down the ramp and slides under the bottom rope. Marshall spins in a circle before stepping up onto the bottom rope and laughing.
Aiello: A very confident young man making his debut tonight.
Piven: Handsome, too. I mean, if you're into guys.
The bell rings, and the two men start to circle. Marshall is the first to take action... well, of sorts. He motions with his hands, apparently asking Nairobi to hit him.
Aiello: ...Did I mention confident?
Piven: I think you did.
Nairobi looks around, as if wondering what the trick is. He throws a high kick, and Marshall blocks it with his arm. He motions for another one.
Nairobi throws a second kick, and Marshall blocks it. Nairobi's starting to look a little flustered. Marshall motions more emphatically, begging for another kick.
Nairobi really throws himself into this one... and Marshall catches the leg, hitting Nairobi with an overhead cradle suplex! Young rises to a stream of boos. As Nairobi starts trying to find his footing, Marshall Young makes goggles out of his hands, shaking his head and mocking Nairobi.
Aiello: Marshall Young compared Nairobi to a dog earlier this week, citing the way he panders to the fans. That derision seems to continue in the ring, as well.
Nairobi throws a solid punch to Young's gut as he's climbing to his feet, interrupting the mockery. Young doubles over, Nairobi hooks him in a headlock--
--and Young shoots him off. Nairobi hits the ropes, bounces back, and Young nails a swinging neckbreaker on the return. Young hits Nairobi with a few stiff kicks as he starts to rise, then hooks the head, going for a suplex--but Nairobi hooks his foe's leg with his own, refusing the suplex. Once. Twice.
Nairobi launches a hard punch into Marshall's side... REVERSAL! Nairobi nails a snap suplex on Young, and both men are lying on the mat. Nairobi's the first to his feet. He hits the ropes and runs at Young, who's gotten back to his feet--Young leaps, Nairobi passes under, hits the opposite side--and gets hit with a spinning elbow from Young on his way back.
Nairobi practically bounces back to his feet; Young goes for the Means to an End, but Nairobi ducks low, lifting Young up onto his shoulders for the Prophecy as he spins back around...!
...Young doesn't stay there long. He slips off to the back of Nairobi, hooking the waist--and hits a thunderous German suplex! He bridges for the pin.
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KICKOUT! Nairobi kicks out at two and a half!
Aiello: A very back and forth matchup so far!
Piven: Young's not giving Nairobi the time to do all that pandering.
Marshall drags Nairobi to his feet, whipping him into the corner. Grabbing the ropes, he starts slamming his shoulder into Nairobi's midsection, over and over... then switching to forearms, punches, elbows. The referee tells him to take it out of the corner, and after some brief argument from Marshall... he whips Nairobi straight to the other corner.
Nairobi hits the turnbuckle hard, stumbling out. Marshall Young goes to lift him for a backdrop... but Nairobi utilizes the momentum! Reversal into a sunset flip! The ref slides in--
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--but Marshall Young kicks out! Nairobi gets to his feet, hits the ropes, and comes running back just as Marshall's gotten to his feet... but Marshall nails a drop toe hold! Nairobi's head bounces off the mat, and Young immediately applies a crossface.
Nairobi slowly makes his way toward the ropes, the referee continually checking if he wants to tap out.
Aiello: A lot of technical prowess from newcomer Marshall Young, but Nairobi's shown a great deal of resilience these past few weeks.
Piven: I might not like his haircut, but I can't call him a quitter.
After what seems like an eternity, Nairobi gets the rope. Marshall holds the lock several seconds more, before getting told to release it by the referee.
Nairobi uses the ropes to pull himself to his feet; Marshall waits until Nairobi's mostly at a stand before grabbing his arms--TIGER SUPLEX! BRIDGE!
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KICKOUT! Nairobi just barely kicks out! Marshall punches at the mat, shaking his head; he's starting to get frustrated. He again grabs Nairobi's hair, jerking him firmly to his feet; Nairobi fights back with fire, though, throwing a flurry of punches into Marshall's face. The two brawl for a moment, hurling punches back and forth, but Nairobi gets the edge--Marshall stumbles back a few steps.
Nairobi takes a short run at him--TORNADO DDT! Out of nowhere!
Nairobi heads to the corner, waving to the crowd for a little support. They cheer loud, and he comes off the ropes--
--PHOENIX FLIGHT!
...And Marshall Young rolls out of the way.
Nairobi hits the bare mat, hard, and as he stumbles back to his feet, Young scoops him into the air--
MARSHALL LAW!
Nairobi is out like a light! Young hooks the leg.
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DING DING DING!
Jessica Stroup: Your winner, by pinfall--Marshall Young!
"Wings of Feather and Wax" starts to play. The referee tries to hoist Young's hand into the air in victory, but Young jerks it back--he's too busy trash talking the downed Nairobi Jordan.
Aiello: Oh, come on. You already won your match, there's no need for this.
Piven: You gotta send a message, Joey!
After a little while of this, and ignoring the boos of the crowd, Young starts making his way to the back.
Winner: Marshall Young
BACKSTAGE
The scene opens up outside of President Mac's office. A lot of screaming and yelling can be heard. The door then opens and Justin Gold steps out holding his cell phone against his ear, the door slamming behind him
Justin Gold: Matt... we have a huge problem, Mac just said that if anyone on the Monday Night Brawl roster offers to Team up with Shadow Man, they are fired .... I'm not kidding .... I have no idea what to do .... I'm not going back in there, Mac is pissed, apparently Shadow Man shit all over his desk .... No, actual shit .... Also, Mac said to call the network and pull the plug on the bacon commercials .... Damn it, cameras are all around me ... I'll call you back
Justin slides his phone into his pocket
Justin Gold: Guys... cut to commercial please ... we need to edit thi....
COMMERCIAL BREAK
MATCH 2
LUCY MIDDLEY Vs EMMA LOUISE
Piven: This comes ahead tonight.
Jessica Stroup: The following match is a Singles Match and is scheduled for one fall, introducing first, now residing in Battle Creek, Michigan, LUCY MIDDLEY!
if you're sick
if you're sick
if you're sick
if you're sick of it
if you're sick
if you're sick
IF YOU'RE SICK OF IT!
And with that "Sick of It" by Skillet blast into the arena. Shooting out from the black curtain is a rather enthusiastic looking girl, with a may more stern looking female following shortly afterwards. The fans were unsure how to react to Lucy, some cheered and some booed, yet the vast majority booed heavily towards the French Canadian known as Zelda Lavoie. However it appears that Middley hasn't noticed a single thing about the boos as she begins to skip down to the ring. Once at ringside Lucy practically throws herself under the bottom rope and into the ring. Immediately Lucy springs up to her feet, bounce over to one of the corners and leaps up to the middle rope before throwing her hands up in the air. By then Zelda is already at ringside as Lucy makes her hands outline a love-heart and yells out "Haters Be Losers!" before splitting her hands up and jumping back down to the mat.
Jessica Stroup: And her opponent, now residing in New York, EMMA LOUISE!
"This Little Girl" by Cady Groves plays and Emma steps through the curtain. Blows a kiss to the crowd a la Maria and then walks, half dancing to the ring where she slips feet first through the ropes like an envelope before laying suggestively over the top rope
The bell rings.
Emma locks Lucy in a collar and elbow tie up. Lucy reverses it into a sideheadlock. Instead of going for another move she decides to taunt for the crowd.
Lucy Middley: Haters be Losers!
The crowd boos her to no surprise.
Emma pushes Lucy away and they begin to circle each other again.
Aiello: Slow start for the two ladies
Piven: Give it time Joe.
Emma feints a shoot. Lucy is not fazed. Emma slaps Lucy. Lucy Irish Whips Emma into the corner in hits her with a Stinger Splash followed up by multiple punches. Then rolls her up in a schoolgirl pin and grabs a hold of Emma’s tights for leverage.
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Kickout by Emma Louise
Aiello: Lucy trying to put this away early.
Piven: Lucy doesn’t work by the hour.
Emma applies a Snap Suplex followed up by a thrust kick to Lucy’s mid section. Then she drops Lucy with a DDT. Then she hits Lucy with a standing moonsault, and hooks the legs.
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Lucy kicks out.
Aiello: First pinfall attempt by Emma Louise
Piven: It might take more than that to keep Lucy Middley down.
Emma goes to pick up Lucy and is caught in an inverted facelock headscissors. Emma then applies the En-Emma. Immediately following up with Em’s The Brakes. Then she hits the Longkiss Goodnight. And goes for the pin.
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Kickout by Lucy Middley.
Piven: Oh my word, Emma just kissed Lucy Middley then kicked her block.
Aiello: That move slows Lucy Middley down a little bit.
Lucy gets up and wipes her lips in disgust. The Ever Beautiful Very Dangerous Emma Lousie goes for a Twist of Hate but it is countered into Lucy Middley’s DreamDT, followed up with a Critical Chance.
Aiello: Lucy Middley on a comeback
Piven: Damn she looks good.
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Emma kicks out
Emma immediately applies HLA out of nowhere then turns that into a big time GIRL CRUSH follows up with a pinfall and lays seductively over Lucy and hooks the leg.
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Jessica Stroup: Your winner by pinfall, EMMA LOUISE!
Aiello: Emma Louise meant business tonight.
Piven: Damn straight making a statement tonight.
The ref raises Emma hand in victory as she smiles and blows a kiss to the fallen body of Lucy Middley. Monday Night Brawl goes to commercial.
Winner: Emma Louise.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
MATCH 3
HARLOW KINSLEY Vs JON KELLAR
A low rumbling sweeps the arena, and the lights begin to flicker erratically. After a second or so of build up, "Waiting Room" by Switchblade Symphony begins to play in earnest, and Nurse Kinsley appears at the top of the entry ramp. With a distant, vacant expression, she slowly stumbles her way toward the ring, occasionally stopping to stare down members of the audience.
Jessica Stroup: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, fighting out of Tijuana, Mexico… Harlow Kinsley.
Piven: So, the story so far. Kinsley handed Kellar’s whipping boy Slade Hardison his own arse and Kellar got involved to protect him, and now Kellar’s going to get brutally murdered.
Aiello: Blunt…
Kinsley reaches the ring, slowly crawling beneath the bottom rope. Inch by inch, she pulls herself to one of the corners, where she slumps against the turnbuckle. She stares off into space, letting her music play with a face that doesn't seem to acknowledge its surroundings. After a few more moments, she grabs the middle ropes and hoists herself to her feet, shaking off her malaise.
Piven: I’m telling you, Kellar is not going to walk away from this match. That woman is nuts!!!
The lights dim as as the slow string intro of "Heart of Courage" by Two Steps from Hell starts to play. Smoke rises from the ramp and at ringside, turned blue by the arena lighting.
Through that smoke and onto the stage steps Jon Kellar in his "Human Dynamite" persona. His face is painted several shades of red, with a reptillian-like pattern spread across it. The paint around his eyes is darker, and if one looks closely they can make out the distinctive pattern of an eastern dragon's facial lines in a faded black paint. His hands are covered by his MMA gloves, and his feet have an ankle support around them but no boots or shoes.
Around his waist he wears red MMA board-shorts trimmed with various Japan-influenced patterns in white, and in his mouth he has a red gum-shield.
Over the top of his MMA gear he wears a hooded jacket, the hood raised so as to cast a shadow over his face and eyes.
As the music starts to pick up the pace he makes his way down to the ring, slowly and deliberately, always facing forward, never even acknowledging the crowd around him. If one observes closely they can see him blowing some of the smoke out through his nose as he focusses on the task at hand.
Jessica Stroup: And fighting out of Croydon England, weighing 209lbs… The Human Dynamite… Jon Kellar!!!
As the choir builds to its crescendo he reaches the bottom of the ramp and turns to his left, making his way to the ring steps and climbing them. When he reaches the top, and the choir reaches its climax, he brings the arena lights up with a raise of his hands, before stepping into the ring. He removes his hood and jacket, revealing the full extent of his facial art, and drops to his knees in the Kudokan Judo “ready” pose as he awaits the start of the match.
Piven: Beg all you want Kellar, it won’t save you!!!
Kinsley is slumped back in the corner with her arms draped over the ropes, and Kellar is on his knees in the opposite corner, both staring across at each other. The referee calls for the bell.
Aiello: Here we go… Kellar vs Kinsley… Order vs Chaos!
Piven: Kellar attacked Kinsley, he brought this on himself.
Kellar is first up, and Kinsley doesn’t move. Kellar slowly approaches her, then backs away as she doesn’t react.
Aiello: Kellar’s done his research… he remembers what Kinsley did to Hardison last week. He’s being smart…
Piven: Being smart would have been not getting into this mess…
Kellar changes tactics and instead rolls out of the ring. He walks around and approaches Kinsley from outside the ring. He reaches in and grabs her ankle, tripping her so that she lands face first on the mat. She goes down like a sack of potatoes and lies completely flat, still not moving.
Aiello: What is she doing?
Kellar rolls back into the ring and slowly approaches the seemingly unconscious Kinsley. He crouches down and taps her on the head, but she still doesn’t move.
Aiello: Is Kinsley giving up?
Piven: I doubt it…
Kellar approaches and gets on top of Kinsley, wrapping his arms around her waist.
Piven: Oh come on Jon… there’s a time and a place.
Kellar stands, dragging Kinsley to her feet. She is still completely limp as both wrestlers reach their standing stance.
Aiello: Kinsley really needs to think this through because if Kellar lands a suplex…
Kellar throws Kinsley back over his head but she rotates in mid air and lands on her feet.
Aiello: WOAH!!!
Kinsley rebounds off the ropes and leaps onto Kellar’s shoulders, taking him to the mat with some headscissors which she keeps locked as he hits the mat. She tightens her legs around his neck as he struggles on the mat.
Piven: What were you saying about Kellar landing suplexes?
Kellar branches up off the mat to try and alleiviate the pressure, but Kinsley snaps her legs together “crocodile” style across his windpipe. Kellar starts to go blue in the hold and gasps for air, as he reaches out towards the ropes with his leg. He’s able to get one foot on the bottom rope
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Kinsley breaks the hold and Kellar rolls out of the ring to catch his breath. This proves to be a mistake as Kinsely rebounds off the ropes and leaps over the top rope, taking Kellar down with a rolling senton. Kinsley lands on her feet and Kellar hits the ground hard. Kinsley walks away then returns and hits a running dropkick into the side of Kellar’s head.
Piven: So Kellar’s plan to take control seems to be working well so far.
Kinsley doesn’t let up, as she pulls Kellar up to his knees and traps one of his arms, then turns into a guillotine choke. She twists and contorts him, smiling (with her eyes) as she does.
Piven: Kellar’s getting a lesson in submission wrestling here!
Kinsley wrenches back to twist Kellar’s neck some more, but Kellar grabs her round the legs and lifts her up, then drives her towards the ring steps with a spear-come-double leg takedown. The force is enough to separate the two “halves” of the steps as Kellar rolls away and Kinsley holds her back.
Aiello: Kellar’s not the heaviest competitor but he has the weight advantage here.
As Kinsely struggles to her feet, Kellar grabs her in a rear waistlock, hooks her leg and drops her back-first onto the lower half of the steps. Kinsley writhes as Kellar pushes himself up and rolls into the ring, finally enjoying some respite.
Aiello: Kellar’s gameplan has so far been completely negated by Kinsley’s unorthodox style, but with one suplex he’s turned it round
Kellar’s respite doesn’t last long as Kinsley’s hand reaches out and tries to grab his ankle. Kellar pulls himself up and retreats to the centre of the ring as Kinsley rolls back into the ring. Kellar looks down at her, and adjusts his glove straps.
Crowd: KELLAR’S GONNA KILL YOU!!! KELLAR’S GONNA KILL YOU!!!
Kellar approaches Kinsley and pulls her up by the hair, throwing her into the corner where he pins her. He raises his fists.
Aiello: Kellar’s going to let fly with those fast hands!!!!
Kellar hesitates and then slowly backs away, shaking his head. The crowd boo loudly.
Piven: Big mistake! Kinsley won’t show him any mercy!!!
Kinsley charges out and Kellar drops to the mat, taking her over with a double leg takedown. He gets side control and tries for the Kellar Klutch, but Kinsley rolls out of the ring and away from him.
Piven: Smart move darling, you don’t want to get trapped in that!!!
Aiello: Kellar has choked out his past two opponents with that move… if he can get it locked it there’s a good chance it’ll be three for three!
Kinsley walks around the outside of the ring, seemingly in a daze. Kellar goes to advance towards her but then stops. He returns to the centre of the ring and just stares at Kinsley.
Kellar: I’ll take a count out Kinsley!!!
Kinsley doesn’t respond, she just continues to walk zombie like around the ring. Kellar just watches, his arms folded, and mocks checking his watch. The crowd boo as the referee continues his count.
Aiello: Is Kinsley trying to get counted out?
Kellar just waits as Kinsley sleepwalks back up the steps and over the middle rope. She slumps back in the corner, the same way she started the match. This time Kellar storms over and as Kinsley throws herself at him this time he sidesteps her, grabs her in a rear waist lock, carries her to the centre of the ring and drops her face first onto the mat.
Aiello: Kellar’s adjusted his tactics, and now he has the advantage, he’s on the mat, and
Kellar grabs Kinsley’s leg and slams her knee-first into the mat, then drops down into a heel hook. He twists and contorts the ankle and knee as Kinsley struggles towards the ropes. Kellar turns all the way onto his side, continuing to turn Kinsley’s ankle.
Crowd: BREAK HER ANKLE!!! BREAK HER ANKLE!!!
Piven: These Minnesotans are sick. SICK!!!
Kinsley reaches to try and grab the ropes, but is too far away. She looks as if she is about to tap, but instead bridges up off the mat and pushes herself towards the ropes. She is within fingertips of it, when Kellar releases the hold and stands.
Piven: Oh thank god…
Kellar keeps hold of her ankle, however, and drags her back into the centre of the ring, and drops into a kneebar. Kellar continues to focus on the knee, keeping Kinsley away from the ropes and contorting her knee. Kinsley reaches as though she’s going to tap.
Piven: This is brutal… Kellar should be fired immediately!!!
Aiello: Kinsley can handle herself!!!
Kellar stays focussed on the knee, but Kinsley starts to twist and contort in the hold and eventually manages to wriggle out enough to reach up and gouge Kellar in the eye, forcing him to release the hold. Kinsley moves away, clutching at her knee, and pulls herself up with the ropes before hobbling towards Kellar and driving her knee into Kellar’s windpipe. Kellar writhes on the mat as Kinsley just stares vacantly.
Aiello: You know… we haven’t seen a single pinfall attempt in this entire match. Both competitors are determined to go for the submission victory here!!
Kellar drags himself to the corner as Kinsley gets back to her feet. She hobbles over and chokes Kellar on the bottom rope with her foot.
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Kinsley stops the choke short of a DQ. Kellar struggles to get away but Kinsley pulls him up and drapes him over the second rope, then drives him hard into the mat with a Rope Hung DDT. The crowd boos as Kinsley lets out an audible laugh through her mask.
Aiello: Kinsley could get the win here!!!
Piven: She doesn’t care about winning! She just wants to hurt Kellar.
Kinsley drags a semi conscious Kellar up to his feet. He struggles in the corner as Kinsley hobbles over and climbs to the second rope. She drives her elbows into his head.
Piven: See what I mean?! Let that big bald dickhead feel the pain!
Kinsley goes to slam her elbow into Kellar’s head one more time, when he pushes her up into the air and drops her face first onto the turnbuckle. Staggering through the pain of the strikes and the DDT, Kellar is able to get the rear waist lock and throws Kinsley in a German Suplex.
Piven: This doesn’t work K…
Kinsley turns in mid air again but when she lands, her injured leg gives way and she collapses onto the mat. Kellar approaches her and gets another rear waist lock one more time he tries for the German Suplex and this time he lands it, driving Kinsley hard into the mat. He keeps the hold and nails another.
Crowd: TWO!!!
And another
Crowd: THREE!!!
And one more
Crowd: FOUR!!!
Kellar grabs Kinsley in a double underhook chickenwing, and lifts her into the air, looking for a Tiger Suplex. Kinsley swings her legs and stops the throw, then rolls round into a Victory Roll.
Aiello: Change of plan, here’s the cover!!
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The crowd breathe a sigh of relief as Kellar battles out of the victory roll. He goes to counter but Kinsley makes sure he can’t regain control with a punt to the head. The referee admonishes Kinsley as Kellar writhes on the mat.
Aiello: Kellar’s head and neck have taken so much punishment.
Piven: She said she wanted to hear his inner voice rattle, maybe she meant it literally!!
Kinsley gets Kellar up to his feet and grabs Kellar in a ¾ facelock. She runs to the corner and nails the Sobredosis. Rather than go for the pin though, she mounts Kellar and starts laying into his pained head with hammer fists. The referee comes over and tells her to stop, but she swings back and clocks him “accidentally” in the face. The referee staggers away.
As the referee struggles, Kinsley reaches into her boot and pulls out a set of brass knuck. She stares down at Kellar, then punches him hard in the forhead, knocking him out cold much to the disgust of the crowd. She drapes herself across him.
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Winner: Harlow Kinsley (by Pinfall)
Aiello: She cheated!
Piven: SHE WON!!!
Kinsley stands and the referee goes to raise her hand, but she pushes him away. Despite the match being over, Harlow fires a few stiff stomps into Kellar's head to make sure he stays down. The referee protests, and again she shoves him away.
Kinsley slides out to the floor and begins to fish under the ring, the audience starting to boo more emphatically. Finally, she finds what she's looking for--a metal folding chair.
Sliding back into the ring, she wedges one of Jon Kellar's arms in the chair. With his passed out body unable to resist the torture device she's put him in, she turns toward the corner.
Aiello: Somebody needs to put a stop to this!
Nurse Kinsley starts making her way toward the turnbuckle, the ire of the crowd only growing as she climbs. But, just as she's reaching the top, and on the verge of probably breaking Jon Kellar's arm--
--The crowd erupts! Slade Hardison has hit the ring! Kinsley hops short off the turnbuckle, and the two start brawling! After a few back and forth blows, Slade hits her with a powerful right--and she goes down! Rather than getting back up and continuing the fight, however, Kinsley rolls under the bottom rope to the floor.
As Kinsley starts escaping toward the entry ramp, Slade Hardison tends to Jon Kellar, getting the chair unclamped from his arm.
Aiello: That was a close call. If it weren't for Slade, Jon Kellar could have been severely injured.
Piven: What are you talking about, Joe? If it weren't for Slade, Jon wouldn't even be having this fight!
Jon finally stirs, and he and Slade begin making their way to the back.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
RINGSIDE
We open up at the announcer's table, with Aiello and Piven looking directly at the camera, holding up smart phones with the new EWC All Day, Everyday app's logo clearly visible for all at home to see.*
Aiello: Each and every Monday night, ladies and gentlemen, EWC brings you the most exciting wrestling action on planet Earth, bar none.
Piven: Now, you lucky schmucks can make every night a Monday night with the new, free, EWC All Day, Everyday app. Just press the app logo here *presses it* and...
But Piven's phone starts acting wonky.
Piven: *looks at Aiello* Uhm, what the hell's going on? My Iphone's acting screwy.
Aiello: Mine, too. Hey, can we get a technician to...
But, it isn't just them. Throughout the audience, people are noticing their phones are acting weird as well.
Piven: Stupid, backwater, Vikings loving hellhole. Why am I not surprised I can't reception worth a.....
??: You are not expecting any technical difficulties, people. I apologize for the intrusion, but, it is imperative that what I have to say be seen and heard by all. This will only take a few moments. Once again, I apologize for the inconvenience.Her voice rings through EVERYONE'S phones and on the big screen above the ramp. Finally, a face appears, and...
Aiello: Oh my God; it's the woman who hijacked EWC's transmissions the other day!
Piven: She's a cutie. Too bad she's already coming across nuttier than squirrel shit
?: First, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Dianna Bicks, and the other day, I informed EWC President, one esteemed Mr. Danny Mac, that tonight, I would come and offer him a choice.Now, I want to clarify things right off the bat; I do not HATE Danny Mac. In fact, in the weeks to come, you will discover we do have a very, very deep personal connection. I admire the man. I respect the man. In fact, I love the man with all my heart. How could I not; he had done so much for me over the years, it pains me to have to resort to this route.
But, sometimes, love makes you do terrible things. And this thing, this endeavor I am on, is just too critical to let personal feelings obstruct my duty. And my duty is simple...
Mr. Mac...you are harboring a fugitive and a criminal, and I intend to see that his sentence be carried out.
Aiello: What is she...
Bicks: *Looking right at Aiello and Piven* Now, now, A game; it's not polite to interrupt a lady, didn't your wife or mother teach you that?!
Piven: *nearly jumping out of his seat* OH SHIT!!
Bicks: Piven, still a frightened, degenerate puddle of primate jizz, I see. Some things never change. Did you ever get that smell out of your car after Rev and Rosen stole it and took it to Nicaragua? Ahh...good times, good times.
Anyways, I am digressing.
Now, Danny, you've been behaving rather out of pocket the last few months. Letting collectives like Chaos and the Blacklist run amok (although, the Whacklist has been about as usefull as a penis on a telephone pole), betraying Shadow Man and nearly crippling him. All the deceit, all the destruction, the chaos, the pain.
How could you let this happen? How?
I'm not blaming you for it, not completely, though. After all, sometimes you have to work with what you've got. Besides, we all know the nexus of what ails Extreme Wrestling, the source of the infection. And that source is...well...I doubt it would surprise you...
This man...wow...his resume alone the last year is enough to ensure what fate he has coming to him is more than justified. He is a thief, he is a traitor, an usurper, a liar, a womanizer. But we all know that, that's pretty much common knowledge at this juncture. What you may not know is, there is one crime of his that hasn't came to light, the one crime that ensures his damnation. And that crime, my good people...
*voice gnarls* IS MURDER!!
Aiello: Murder? This is our EWC Champion she is talking about right now, how dar...
Bicks: JoJo, quit that right now!!
Piven: *hides behind Joe* SHE'S A CYBER WITCH...BURN HER!!
Bicks: He took the life of somebody that, despite their flaws, was a pretty decent fellow. Somebody that deserved better than the way he died. He died because Mr. Hunter was too much of a coward to face the ultimate sin he committed. And he swept it under the rung, just like so many other sins of his...
And his father, who's legendary pedigree also belies and insidious past as well. And it will all come to light, but for one thing...
This offer I give to Mr. Mac. Danny, my old friend, I mentioned not long ago you had a choice to make, one that meant two paths for the EWC...
Its salvation....or its annihilation! That choice is how you choose to respond to much rather, shall I say, forceful request.
Mr. Hunter is guilty. There is no doubt about it. We all have seen the evidence of his degradation; they alone seal the deal. But, if I have to prove my case, Mr. Mac, well...
You might not like how the proceedings will affect the federation. So, you have two options now to ponder....
Option A: You surrender custody of Xplode to me, on November 2nd, personally, in the middle of the ring, for me to carry out the sentence. And before you two nitwits butt in again...*stares at the announcers*, the sentence is simple....
DEATH!!
I give Jayden the justice he deserves, you keep your federation whole, and I will be on my merry way. *says with a warm, beaming smile on her adorable face. Or...
Option B: You deny justice, you protect this toilet bug in a tailored suit, and old friend...*suddenly, the smile turns into pure, seething hatred*
I tear you, your fed, and everything you love to pieces! I will obliterate this fed. I will unleash a plague upon it that hasn't been seen on Earth since the Spanish Flu Pandemic. Your roster, your fans, your investors, Jayden's loved ones and associates, will endure levels of agony only reserved for the most degenerate and damned souls of Hell itself. All that you and him love will burn, and you will only have yourselves to blame. I know Jayden is too much of a chickenshit reprobate to do the right thing...
The man knows NOTHING about the right thing...
So, I'm entrusting you to take the reins and steer this wonderful place back to the right direction.
This isn't an easy choice to make; I mean, you would be sending a man to his demise. That choice is never a simple one to make, but...
You also have hundreds...THOUSANDS...of lives to consider. So, two weeks from now, I will personally visit you, in that ring, and I hope I get a lovely present of degenerate cocksucker gift wrapped, for me, to gut like a trout on live television and streaming.
Think well. And to everybody out there besides Jayden...*that deceivingly friendly smile is back on her lips*
You have a wonderful evening!
EWC Tron goes blank. Fans are bewildered, Piven is hiding behind Aiello, who's mouth is gaping and his skin is ghostly pale.
Aiello: I...I...don't know what to say....
Piven: *freaking out, smashing his IPhone* STUPID STEVE JOBS AND HIS STUPID, DEMON INFESTED SHIT BASTARD FUCK PHONES! And how did she know about my car...
Aiello: We'll be back after we pump a sedative into Jeremy's scared ass. Man, sit down already, you scared little girl!!
COMMERCIAL BREAK
MATCH 4
JTC Vs LIVING DEAD KARL
Piven: Welcome back folks, things have sort of settled down now that the crazy lady is gone. Also, how about that new Star Wars trailer huh? December can't come soon enough
Aiello: Moving onto our next match...
Mist begins to rise, soon blanketing most of the arena at low altitudes, the eerie mood augmented with the dimming of the lights, all of which is accompanied by "Pretend We're Dead". At about 15 seconds into the song, a form manifests itself from the once-obscuring fog as if having risen from the ground itself. At about the 35-second mark, Living Dead Karl shambles into view, arms extended, moaning like the zombie he is, but he then irritatedly drops the whole shtick and switches gears, storming to the ring with purpose, trying to antagonize front seat adults and scare their kids. Once ringside, he will try to make a beeline to the throat of his opponent, but if the referee puts up a fuss, usually by them shaking a crucifix or garlic at him, he'll recoil and bide his time.
Jessica Stroup: The following match is scheduled for one fall. Coming to the ring first, weighing in at 255lbs of decomposing, hell-damned flesh, hailing from Gettysburg, PA...Living Dead Karl!
Aiello: I don't see Forsythe or Townsend anywhere tonight. Wonder why they're not here?
Piven: Heard there was an mortuary convention in town; saw Townsend with a bone-saw. They probably went there instead, to, you know...*smirks* crack open a couple of cold ones!
Aiello: Jesus, Piven, stop, just....stop!!
"Another Me" By Jeff Hardy hits the pa system as the fans are in mixed chants 'Cross Sucks... Lets Go Cross' as JTC and Hope Chambers comes walking out behind JTC, JTC wearing his blue jeans and a white tank top with his face painted as JTC and Hope walks down the ramp as we give the fans high fives who wants to as I slide in the ring and raise my hands by the center of the ropes.
And his opponent, weighing in at 240lbs, from Madison, Wi, via Milwaukee....The Phenomenal King...JOHNATHAN TAYLOR....
Poor Jessica nearly gets trampled as both men charge at each other like rampaging bulls and start trading punches. She lunges out of the way as the bell rings and the match jumps off.
Piven: Fear the Running Dead!
Aiello: Both these guys are working each other like a heavy bag, this is brutal right off the bat!
JTC gets the upper hand; he lands a dropkick at Karl's knees, then, while he's doubled over, bounces off the ropes and lands Fame-Asser. Although shaken, Karl has problem getting up, but JTC is relentless. He kicks at Karl's legs some more, then boots him in the gut and lands a snap DDT. Cover by JTC...
1
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2
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Thrown off by LDK!!
Aiello: It's unearthly how strong Karl is.
Piven: And he's got a breath to match. It's like the smell of burning tires wrapped in dirty diapers!
JTC is stunned, and as he goes back on the offensive, LDK grabs him by the throat and starts throttling him, then, drills him into the mat with a double handed chokeslam. He picks him back up, drills him with some knees to the midsection, hoists him over his head, and drops him back to the mat with a gorilla press. Cover by Karl...
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2
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Kickout by JTC!!
Aiello: That was close.
Piven: I know *tasting his coffee* I thought they forgot to put soy milk in my macchiato!
LDK mounts JTC and starts alternating punches. Immediately after the assault ends, LDK drags Cross and throws him over top rope onto the concrete. The crowd hisses and boos, but LDK laughs.
Aiello: Dirty pool by LDK!
Piven: Duh and/or hello...he's an undead abomination, JoJo. What did you expect...Marquis of Queensbury rules?
LDK saunters out casually while JTC gets to his feet. He tries to thwart him with punches, but LDK shrugs them off, laughing. He boots JTC in the face, knocking him down. The crowd starts chanting "JTC, JTC", trying to get him motivated.
Aiello: JTC's gaining a real solid following every since he retooled his personality. He's got a cult following.
Piven: So does LDK, except his cult following is trying to destroy reality through dark rituals!
JTC crawls over to the ring apron, reaching under it for something. LDK is just smirking and shaking his head like, "what are you doing, dumb little kid?" But when he reaches down to grab his hair, JTC produces what looks like a can of mace. He sprays LDK,....AND LDK'S FACE STARTS TO SMOKE AND HE SCREAMS IN AGONY!!
Aiello: What on Earth did he spray him with?
Piven: Oh, it'd be this...*pulls out a can with a Savage Solutions logo on it* It's called GhoulBGone! Made with holy water, sage, garlic, white oak shavings and a dandruff flakes from the Buddha's corpse! GhoulBGone! It turns the undead into the flat out dead!!
Aiello: Are you shilling Tony's shit now? Geez....
Piven: Zip it, Leatherface. Entourage flopped in theaters and I gots a mortgage to pay.
LDK is reeling, while JTC braces himself. When LDK turns around, JTC nearly takes his head off with a superkick. He pauses to catch his breath, then picks LDK and throws him back into the ring, LDK is still spazzing like a dying fish on the deck. JTC stands outside, jumps on the top rope, and drops a leg on LDK's throat. JTC with the cover....
1
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Kickout by LDK!
Aiello: Man, that GhoulBGone is nasty stuff! LDK's world is rocked by it!
Piven: Works great on the paparazzi, too. You should've seen the TMZ douchebag who got a half a can in his eyes for bugging me!
JTC picks him up and sets him up for a piledriver, but LDK flips him over his back and drops him on the mat. JTC's holds his back in pain, while LDK's still growling in agony, rubbing his eyes. LDK Irish Whips JTC into the corner, and Gores him right in the ribs. JTC clutches his midsection and flops face first onto the mat. But LDK is still woozy and screeching in agony.
He's slow to cover JTC...
1
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2
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Thr....Nope. Kickout by JTC! The audience goes bananas and continues to chant JTC while Karl slaps the mat in frustration!
Aiello: What heart by the Phenomenal King. He got folded like laundry by that Gore, and he's still not down for the count!
Piven: Man, I hate fans sometimes. Not long ago, they were booing this assclown; now they like him? Sheesh, what a fickle bunch!
LDk Irish Whips him into the ropes; he tries to land a Tilt-A-Whirl, but JTC counters with a head scissors! Both men are down on the mat. Then, coming down the ramp...
Aiello: *sarcastically* Oh, joy. The Ungrateful Dead are shambling their way down here.
Piven: Seriously, Mac, if you're going to let these rotten bastards in the building, you'd better start investing in more Febreeze!!
While the referee is distracted by this shambling mass of decomposing jobber meat, Nurse Kinsley
slinks her way from the stands. She finds herself ringside, and she slides LDk with, something that looks like a book....
Aiello: Oh, crap, is that...
Piven: Yup; THE NECRONOMICRON!
Aiello: Where did LDK get THAT!!?
Piven: Either an unholy black Sabbath ritual...or he overnighted it from Amazon!
LDK creeps over slowly to retrieve the book as JTC is trying to get to his feet...
LDK grabs the book. JTC is about to strike, then...
LDK springs back to his feet, his face still billowing smoke, and smokes JTC in the forehead with the unholy tome. Another hit, then another, and another...
WHAM!! JTC falls over. LDK throws the book out of the ring and makes the cover.
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2
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3!
THE BELL RINGS!!
Stroup: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner, via pinfall....Living Dead Karl
Aiello: What a very strange, but very rewarding match.
Piven: Unholy relics, experimental anti-necrotic weapons, and just a great, great effort by both competitors.
Aiello: They're still going at it though...
The referee is nearly helpless as LDK and JTC continue to brawl, and the Endless Walk entourage tries to make their way into the ring. Finally, security, aided by a few Catholic priests, manage to separate both men. It's complete bedlam as Karl and Cross are screaming at each other.
Aiello: This fight may be over, but this unholy war's just getting started!
Piven: This match was brought to you by...GhoulBGone! GhoulBGone: Never Fear The Walking Dead Again!
Aiello: Geez...*groans*
BACKSTAGE
The cameras shoot to the locker room area with Chris Calvin and King Flip.
Chris Calvin: You ready to go out there and beat face?
King Flip: I don't know why Face from A-Team is here, but if he's stopping me from kicking Moltres' Po'Ke'ASS then he's getting his shit kicked in as well.
Chris Calvin: Oh yeah!? What about Mr. T?
King Flip: I pity the fool who almost let him go over at WrestleMania.
Chris Calvin: Anything else to say, double champ?
King Flip: Aside from the fact that Corey X is a buffoon? Not until I hit the ring.
Chris Calvin: Do the damn thing. I'll... stay back here because I don't need the cardio of walking back and forth from the ring so damn fast. GOT EEM!
King Flip walks out, leaving Chris Calvin to exaggerate a smile and nod as the camera fades.
MATCH 5
KING FLIP Vs TIM MILTRAZ
The intro to Burning Down the House by "The Used" plays, as Watch Out is sang out steps Tim Miltraz.
Stroup: Introducing first... Tim Miltraz!
He bends down and rises back up with the devil horn pose as neon green pryo shoots off behind him. He makes his way down the ramp, slapping the hands of the fans. As he runs toward the apron and leaps to it, out comes Flip with a very slow and exaggerated slap. Miltraz makes another running jump to a top turnbuckle before he hears the clap. His music prematurely dies down. Flip waits a moment before raising the microphone in his hand.
King Flip: T Tricky Timmy T-Mil Miltraz. I wanted to say a couple of things before I walk down to that ring tonight and completely embarrass you on your first night. Y'see, Millbo Baggins, I'm in a sticky situation right now. I've got Brett Black somewhere behind me in the back, just hanging out in the shadows -- possibly masturbating -- just waiting for me to lower my defenses enough to strike. He's a coward in that sense and he doesn't seem like he's the type of man to obtain a sweeping victory and call it a night. I couldn't possibly be that lucky. Then there's the man ahead of me. Not you, Mill Smith, not you at all. It's more like the man I want ahead of me... The EWC Champion, X. He's inches, maybe even feet out of my grasp now, kid. And you're the one that's gotten themselves in the position of being my message to both of them. But don't worry, Timmy Mouthbreather, I'll make it quick. I promise you that much.
Flip drops the microphone and walks to the ring. Miltraz is waiting for him, having already entered the ring and thrown his EWCTV promo shirt to the fans. They threw it back so he had to throw it again. CHK slides into the ring and catches T-Mil with a dropkick to the face as the bell rings. He's quick to his feet again and is caught with several right forearms to the face that position him into the corner. Flip Irish whips and is reversed, Tim sending Flip into the corner and running after him, but Flip hops to the second turnbuckle and leaps into a springboard spinning heel kick to the face. TM hits the ground and rolls over with his hands on his face. Flip clutches Tim's midsection from behind and power-lifts him into a German suplex. He locks the hold on him, rolls to his feet, lifts the opponent and hits a second German. Then does the same and releases the hold on the third German suplex.
Aiello: Holy crap, Piven. King Flip is absolutely dismantling this poor kid on his first night here.
Piven: Welcome to Extreme Wrestling Corporation, kid. Next time show up to fight.
The King lifts Trick up and gets him positioned on the top turnbuckle. Tim tries to throw a punch and is blocked. Flip connects with a gnarly headbutt to the nose that immediately causes it to bleed, then climbs to the second rope and executes the planned superplex. Tim Miltraz immedaitely sits up with one hand reaching for his lower back, but Flip is quick to his own feet and runs to the ropes Miltraz is facing. Springboard leg lariat. Miltraz seems like he's out of it in the center of the ring. CHK sees this and runs to the ropes.
Aiello: DETHRONEMENT! DETHRONEMENT!!
Piven: Now he's going to the top rope. Miltraz hasn't been able to stop any of this.
Aiello: ROYAL BLOOD! ROYAL BLOOD!!
Piven: Any more of a beating and I may actually start liking this guy. Ah, pinfall, nevermind.
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3!!
Stroup: Here's your winner... King Flip!
WINNER: KING FLIP
The King has his arm raised in victory. He walks over to Miltraz as the referee checks on him and brushes his shoulder off onto Miltraz before leaving the ring to "Obnoxious" by Immortal Technique.
BACKSTAGE
Ace Heart: Hello, Ace Heart backstage here in Minneapolis and outside the office of President Mac
The door opens and President Mac comes storming out while talking on his phone
Ace Heart: Mac, any comments on the Woman who came out just a few moments ago, or the situation with Shadow Man
Mac stops
President Mac: I'll call you back
Mac puts his phone in his pocket and opens his office door again
President Mac: You want a comment? Look at the pile of SHIT sitting on my desk ... Who does that? What kind of sane human does that? On my desk! It's not even MY desk ... it's the GM of the Building's Desk ... Now I need to buy a brand new bloody desk! Who gives a crap about some girl that just came out here, are you kidding me? Look at that!!! Get these cameras out of my face and cut to a damn commercial
Mac storms back off down the hall
Ace Heart: Well as you ca...
Mac stops and screams in the background
Mac: COMMERCIAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
COMMERCIAL BREAK
NON TITLE
METAL BLACK Vs XPLODE (C)
“I Stand Alone” by Godsmack begins to play! The crowd stands up to their feet as the arena lights fade to a crimson red! A fireworks display emits above the entrance, forming a giant X!
Jessica Stroup: Coming to the ring. He is known as the Destroyer of Worlds. Please welcome.. The EWC Champion ... XPLODE!!!
The crowd continues to applaud and scream as a fog machine covers the entrance. Stepping out unto the stage, Xplode looks out at the fans. He looks ripped, sweat dripping down the sides of his forehead. Walking to the ramp, he proceeds down to the ring. Behind him, above the stage, a zoomed in image of his determined face is highlighted within a red spotlight. His head held high with pride as the fans reach out to touch him.
Aiello: Welcome back, we have been instructed to focus solely on the Main Event and that's what we are going to do. To call the words between these two heated would be an understatement.
Piven: Somebody's gonna die tonight. I can feel it.
Arriving at ringside, Xplode rolls under the bottom rope and walks to center ring. He raises one hand and points at the arena rooftop.. Letting the camera zoom in on the Show's logo hanging from the arena rooftops. Looking out at the fans, Xplode smirks as the fans are showing bowing to him in respect. The music continues to play now as Xplode ascends a turnbuckle post, staring out into the sea of fans before him.
Jessica Stroup: And his opponent, from Detroit Michigan... the Motor City Maneater, Metal Black!
The lights dim as a few acoustic cords get strummed over the PA. While the short intro to "Conditions Of My Parole" by Puscifer plays across the arena, Metal Black appears at the top of the entry ramp, wearing a leather jacket and... not much else. She calmly lights a Black & Mild cigar, and as the real meat of the song hits in full blast, a wall of pyro erupts on either side of her. She takes her time marching to the ring, high fiving fans, leaning over the guard rail to let them take selfies with her, and otherwise having the time of her life.
Once she hits the ring, she slides under the bottom rope. Metal Black paces around a bit before putting her cigar out on one of the turnbuckles, then flicks it to the floor and pull herself up on the corner. The cheers of the crowd heighten for a moment as she grabs the edges of her jacket, hesitantly... then tugs it from her shoulders, tossing the jacket to the referee and revealing what might well be the lewdest ring attire in professional wrestling.
The bell has barely finished ringing, and both fighters are in the center of the ring, shouting in each other's faces.
The crowd is going nuts, chanting.
METAL BLACK!
METAL BLACK!
METAL BLACK!
METAL BLACK!
METAL BLACK!
Slowly, slowly, the intense anger on Xplode's face twists into a rather sadistic looking grin. He motions to the crowd, muttering something to Metal Black--
Aiello: Ohhh, this is a bomb waiting to go off.
--and the brawl ensues! She clocks him in the dome, and he fires back! A flurry of punches from both parties, one punch, then another, the two trading blows with a newfound passion! The chants break as the fans cheer out in unison!
X starts to get the advantage, however. Metal's punches get weaker and weaker as X's punches drive her to the corner. Once she's got her back pinned to the turnbuckle, he goes to whip her into the opposite corner... but she reverses the irish whip, sending him across the ring!
Metal gives chase, going for a big splash... but X barely shifts out of the way, and she slams sternum first into the turnbuckle. She stumbles back, turns--and takes a hard clothesline from Xplode.
Metal Black bounces to her feet, and X clotheslines her a second time. ...And again, with a little less stability, she stumbles to firm footing... and for a third time, Xplode drops her with a clothesline. He shouts at her, waving with his hands, pleading for her to get back up for one more. She has to put a hand on the ropes to find her footing this time, but she does, and she turns--
--Xplode lifts her up for a spinebuster, turns in place--
--and she reverses it! She hooks the head! DDT! They both hit the mat, and hard!
After a moment or two for both wrestlers to catch their breath, they both rise at about the same time. Again, they go back to the punches--slower, more weary than before, but back and forth punches nonetheless. Metal holds her ground this time, at least until X shoves her back--and follows through with a hard tackle, taking her to the ground. With the mount, he starts throwing hard punches directly into her face.
Aiello: You just can't out power the EWC champion.
Piven: And I'll bet you can't just explain that to Metal Black, either.
The referee tries to pry Xplode off, but he just keeps punching, blow after blow toward Metal's jaw. On the second attempt to argue by the referee, X relents, actually spitting on Black as he climbs to his feet. She doesn't get a moment to rest, as X immediately grabs a handful of her hair and jerks her to her feet.
Xplode drags her to the corner, slamming her face first into the turnbuckle. Once. Twice. He goes for the third, but she stiffens her arms, gripping at the ropes. She fires a hard elbow to X's face, sending him back a step... but as she turns to escape, he rushes back in with a European uppercut.
Metal slumps into the turnbuckle, and X immediately starts in again with the punching. He hits her with furious lefts and rights, raining blows down on her as she slowly sinks to the mat. Once she's fallen too low to punch, he starts stomping, and stomping, and stomping. The once excited reaction of the crowd has begun to putter out, a less enthused reaction building to the severe beating X is giving Metal Black.
Aiello: If the fans didn't hate Xplode as of last week, they're certainly going to now.
Piven: Not in the face, X! That's her money maker! Well... one of them, anyway.
Again, the referee tells X to let up, and take it out of the corner. This time, X turns, actively getting in the referee's face--pointing, yelling, attempting to intimidate the referee. Metal Black grabs one rope, then the other, slooowly hoisting herself to her feet...
...and as X turns to see her up, he throws another punch. Metal catches the arm--half nelson backbreaker! X recoils to his feet, grabbing at his spine, and Metal throws a few punches into his skull before whipping him into the same turnbuckle she was just at.
She leaps onto the bottom rope, looking to go for a facebuster from the turnbuckle--but X brings a quick punch to her side, dropping her out of the corner. He comes out strong with a clothesline, but Metal hits the mat early, putting X down with a drop toe hold.
Rather than capitalize on the downed X, Metal Black paces away... taking a moment to breathe, gripping at her jaw, waiting for X to get to his feet of his own volition.
Aiello: Metal Black's shown some extreme durability in the past, but she's never fought anyone on Xplode's level. Her lack of experience might be her Achilles Heel in this fight.
Once X has started to climb back to a stand, Metal jumps back into it, throwing a hard forearm into his back before he can get upright. She follows through with knees, her hands struggling to keep him bent over as she fires one knee after another into his chest...
...but around the fifth knee, he grabs her rising leg, and trips her to the mat. With the leg still held, X starts hooking the Figure Four!
After a great deal of struggling, X gets Metal pulled to the center of the ring, and he gets the Figure Four locked on.
Piven: Welp, that's it. Somebody owes me money.
Aiello: It's not over yet, Piven.
Slowly, slooowly, Metal Black tries to drag the two of them toward the ropes. The referee repeatedly asks if she wants to give up, and Metal Black loudly, adamantly refuses.
Piven: It's over, Joe.
Aiello: No it's not.
...And finally, Metal gets the ropes. Xplode continues to crank on the leg lock for several seconds, even with the referee shouting for him to let go. X eventually lets it go, and Metal practically hugs the ropes for support.
Xplode waits for her to stand up, waits for her to turn around. He's hunched over, stalking, ready--he fires a hard kick to her gut, and Metal doubles over. He pulls her in, maybe for a piledriver, maybe for a powerbomb, maybe for the Drop Zone--
--but Metal grabs his legs, swinging them out from under him! His back hits the mat, but before she can go for any sort of submission hold, X kicks her back with both feet. Her back hits the ropes, X gets up quickly and goes in for the grab--
--and Metal jerks down on the top rope, sliding out of the way and sending X tumbling onto the apron. Xplode quickly regains his balance on the apron, just as Metal Black's running from the inside of the ring to the second rung of the turnbuckle. She bounces from the post to the outside, and
APRON DDT!
Piven: Holy crap!
Aiello: Certainly a newer move from Metal Black!
She slams Xplode's head into the edge of the ring with the full weight of her body! The crowd erupts, Metal only hardly landing on her feet. Metal takes another second to breathe, running a hand through her hair as Xplode's body rolls onto the floor. The referee starts the count.
1...!
2...!
Xplode, gripping the apron, starts to get up. Metal Black clears some distance between them, hands on her knees, scouting it out.
3...!
4...!
Metal Black comes running hard at Xplode. She leaps up, hooks the head for a running DDT--but as she and Xplode twist around, he shoves her off and straight to the floor, her grip coming loose. The momentum is still enough to almost bring Xplode down with her.
5...!
Aiello: You've got to keep the flash and the showboating to a minimum if you hope to beat the champion. That was an amateur move by Metal Black.
Piven: Man... but the flash and showboating are so fun.
Xplode grabs Metal Black's hair with both hands, yanking her to her feet. He slams her face first into the guard rail, never relinquishing his grip on her head.
6...!
He turns her around, grabs the arm--and goes to sling her into the corner post, but she reverses the irish whip again! She sends X crashing face first into the base of the turnbuckle, and nearly tripping over the stairs.
7...!
He stumbles backward, groggy as he turns. Metal--with an impressive struggle, and buckling knees, lifts Xplode into a fireman's carry position across her shoulders.
8...!
She turns... and with a very shaky fireman's carry flapjack, drops him halfway across the steel steps! She can barely get back to her own feet, stumbling, wandering--
9...!
--but slides into the ring, and back out, just in time to reset the count.
Piven: Wait. Correct me if I'm wrong, but if she hadn't just slid out to reset the count--
Aiello: --She probably would have won by count out.
Piven: So... is she trying to be honorable, or...?
Aiello: Or she doesn't understand the rules. Flip a coin, your guess is as good as mine.
After laying on the stairs for a little while, Xplode starts to push himself back to a stand. His scalp's been cracked open from impact with the stairs, blood starting to run down his face. He takes a couple of steps backward, not looking entirely like he knows where he is... and catches an enzui forearm smash to the back from Metal Black. He hits the floor. The referee has started the count fresh. Metal Black walks up the steel steps.
She takes to the air, going for a HUGE flying legdrop on the downed Xplode, but he rolls out of the way! She lands hard, stunned for a second; X finds a way to scurry to his feet, awkwardly, but well enough to throw a stiff kick to her chest. She goes down flat to her back.
Xplode backs up to the guard rail before stumbling forward with a knee drop, smashing Metal Black's face between his knee and the floor. She flails, grabbing at her face and kicking at the air, and Xplode looks to be getting his wind back.
Aiello: The EWC champion said, prior to this match, that he wanted to "break her mouth."
Piven: He's got a good start on it, credit for his focus.
After a second of hesitation on the floor, he starts to get back up, grabbing her by the head to take her with him... toward the announce table.
After a short distance around the steel steps, Xplode picks Metal Black up... carrying her the extra distance with little effort, before body slamming her hard into the commentator's table. They clear away from it, the table shaking, but not giving way. Xplode retreats to the ring for a second, rolling in and out to break the referee's count. The ref starts yelling for X to quit whatever he's up to, but he doesn't seem to be listening.
Aiello: Well--
Piven: This ain't good!
X climbs onto the announce table. He takes a handful of Metal Black's hair, hoisting her to her feet. He looks out into the crowd with a smirk... and he hooks one arm. He hooks the other. He starts to lift her for the Drop Zone.
Starts to.
Metal's feet change position. She struggles, squirms, tries to work her way out.
X's expression changes. He pulls her back in, starts to lift her again, but Metal Black takes the initiative, backdropping X onto the table! The table shakes hard as the 265 pound Xplode crashes into it... but it doesn't break. The referee isn't even bothering to count at this point, just frantically yelling for the competitors to get off the table.
Aiello: This is getting out of control!
Metal Black heaves, gasps, fights to stay standing. The roar of the crowd is deafening. Xplode gets up on his own behind her, the two turn to face each other--
--Metal Black slings an arm, hooks the leg--
MOTOGRATER!
THROUGH THE TABLE!
The cheers from the audience could blow the roof off the building! The sold out crowd is on their feet! The chants can be heard from three blocks away! The table is broken, both Metal Black and Xplode laying in a heap on the floor!
HO-LY SHIT!
HO-LY SHIT!
HO-LY SHIT!
HO-LY SHIT!
HO-LY SHIT!
Piven: Well, there it went. My favorite table.
The referee just looks like he lost all control of his life. He fears for his job, genuinely. He... he starts the count, after a second of hesitant panic.
1... 2...
Both Metal Black and Xplode look dead. Physically dead.
3... 4...
New members of Living Dead Karl's army. They are not coming back.
5... 6...
X wakes up first, despite Metal having been the one to deliver the move. He looks groggy, but starts to pull himself to his feet.
7...
Metal Black is next. By the time she even somewhat looks cognitive, X is about halfway to a stand.
8...
Xplode grabs Metal Black. He pulls her to the ring with him.
9 . . .
He shoves her under the bottom rope, and follows after. The referee stops just on the edge of the count out, and both wrestlers just... lay there for a little while.
Piven: Again, about the count out--
Aiello: I don't think it's just about winning, Piven. Both of these competitors are out here to prove something, and I don't think a win by count out would do that.
The referee starts a new count, for the double KO, but Xplode fights his way up before it can become an issue. It's only now that X realizes he's bleeding, bringing a hand to his face and finding the blood on his fingertips. He breathes in deep, his expression growing very upset.
Xplode shouts at the downed Metal Black. He waves for her to get back up. She struggles, and fails, to make it to her feet. After a bit of huffing and looking around, X gets impatient, and grabs her. He pulls her up, and she barely stands on her own. He hits her with a hard right, and she fumbles into the ropes, almost dropping from the single punch.
...But she doesn't fall. Not quite. She springs off the ropes, and into another punch from X. She takes it across the face, but keeps standing even without support from the ropes this time. A left. A right. He keeps hitting her, over and over, in the face. Slow, tired, but thunderous punches. After about the fifth, he comes in close, meeting his eyes to her's. He shouts something at her, at point blank...
...and she spits a mouthful of blood at him, spraying it in X's face.
Furious, X starts to throw another punch, but Metal catches the arm. She punches him. And again. And again. She starts to build steam, momentum, going faster than the worn out X can keep up with. He squeezes in a few shots, here and there, but nothing like the blitz she's drilling him with. The crowd's getting behind her again. She backs him across the ring, to the ropes on the opposite side, before grabbing his arm and bouncing him off. She whips him across the ring...
...and as he comes rushing back, she hooks her hands, flying at him with a hammer punch. He ducks it. She fights to her feet quickly, turns--
--and takes a kick to the gut. Xplode doesn't waste any time, hustling to hook both arms, and
DROP ZONE!
The thud is dull, the crowd almost silent as he rolls her over. He takes the pin with no fanfare, no posturing. He almost seems like he's in a hurry to get it over with. The referee slides in.
1
.
.
.
.
2
.
.
.
.
3!
DING DING DING!
Jessica Stroup: Your winner, by pinfall... Xplode!
"I Stand Alone" by Godsmack starts to play, and Xplode sits back on his knees. The referee goes to raise his hand, but the look X gives him changes his mind. Despite being the winner, he doesn't look satisfied.
Aiello: There you have it, folks. Metal Black showed a lot of heart in this match up, but... sometimes heart isn't enough to win.
Piven: I... really thought she could have had it, there for a minute. Ah, well, somebody owes me money! The EWC Champion has proved once again that he is a force to be reckoned with is deserving of our respect. From all of us here in Minneapolis - Good night and see you next week. Are we not even going to mention the desk full of shi...
Winner: Xplode
© THE EXTREME WRESTLING CORPORATION 2015
END CREDITS
MATCH WRITERS
MATCH 1 - Metal Black
MATCH 2 - Nairobi Jordan
MATCH 3 - Jon Kellar
MATCH 4 - Tony Savage
MATCH 5 - King Flip
MAIN EVENT - Metal Black
MATCH 2 - Nairobi Jordan
MATCH 3 - Jon Kellar
MATCH 4 - Tony Savage
MATCH 5 - King Flip
MAIN EVENT - Metal Black
SEGMENTS
Nurse Kinsley
Living Dead Karl
Shadow Man
Tony Savage
King Flip
Living Dead Karl
Shadow Man
Tony Savage
King Flip
BRAWL VOTERS THIS WEEK
President Mac
Miss Ronda
Michael Saint
Jon Goldberg
Miss Ronda
Michael Saint
Jon Goldberg
QUICK RE-CAP
SHOW OPENER
NAIROBI JORDAN [1RP] Vs MARSHALL YOUNG [1RP]
WINNER: Marshall Young
MATCH 2
LUCY MIDDLEY [N/S] Vs EMMA LOUISE [1RP]
WINNER: Emma Louise
MATCH 3
HARLOW KINSLEY [1RP] Vs JON KELLAR [1RP]
WINNER: Harlow Kinsley
MATCH 4
JTC [1RP] Vs LIVING DEAD KARL [1RP]
WINNER: Living Dead Karl
MATCH 5
KING FLIP [1RP] Vs TIM MILTRAZ [N/S]
WINNER: King Flip
MAIN EVENT
METAL BLACK [1RP] Vs XPLODE (C) [1RP]
WINNER: Xplode
© THE EXTREME WRESTLING CORPORATION 2015
NAIROBI JORDAN [1RP] Vs MARSHALL YOUNG [1RP]
WINNER: Marshall Young
MATCH 2
LUCY MIDDLEY [N/S] Vs EMMA LOUISE [1RP]
WINNER: Emma Louise
MATCH 3
HARLOW KINSLEY [1RP] Vs JON KELLAR [1RP]
WINNER: Harlow Kinsley
MATCH 4
JTC [1RP] Vs LIVING DEAD KARL [1RP]
WINNER: Living Dead Karl
MATCH 5
KING FLIP [1RP] Vs TIM MILTRAZ [N/S]
WINNER: King Flip
MAIN EVENT
METAL BLACK [1RP] Vs XPLODE (C) [1RP]
WINNER: Xplode
© THE EXTREME WRESTLING CORPORATION 2015
