Post by Narumi Tsutsumi on Apr 19, 2024 22:39:40 GMT -6
(Narumi Tsutsumi is shown sprawled in front of the first lowest phone box at London’s Out of Order art display of a dozen phone boxes leaning on each other like dominoes. She’s in her ring entrance gear with her oni mask off beside her while figures dressed in yokai masks surround the scene. She grins playfully.)
“I’m sure some wonder how I find it within myself to participate in Stranglemania XIX when I’ve descended from main eventer leaving double champion last Mania to starting the show this year. Deep down, I’ve gotten a kick out of finding ways to start a new path from square one. Now I will use my time down in hell to fight my way up the Hellevator towards the holy grail representing the most creative and unconventional figure in EWC history, the Iggy Swango Memorial Cup!”
(The Grade One Yokai hops to her feet and then walks in front of the bottom first booth domino. With a playful smirk she does a kick motion to land her foot on the booth, as if she is causing the entire domino effect of the scenery.)
“I believe striking my way to that cup is a spectacular way to begin a domino effect towards the Hardcore Championship and completing my yokai evolution to the next grade. Purists demean hardcore matches like the Hellevator and deep down I’ve hesitated to lean more into my oni ways out of concern for how people would react to it. But Iggy was an out-there thinker who represented freaks and geeks, so a match after her is a perfect time for me to be as violent and offbeat as I’ve always wanted to be. Which is bad news for my opponents.”
(Narumi crawls up the first leaned-over phone box with gleeful anticipation in her wild eyes.)
“To start the falling dominoes, the lineup of newer talents makes me think back to my starting days travelling with my best friend Megumi and eventually meeting Iggy at my first Prime Finale. Before then, solid wins like Paige beating Phoenix, Zero bullying Wolfe, Rick pulverizing Aquilla, and Divewire finishing off what I left of Gabi would’ve had me questioning if I could handle this competition. But after I promised Iggy I’d follow in the footsteps of the main event Youngblood winners before me, she gave Megumi a Cheeks of Steel DVD for us to watch at Wrestlefest XIX to make me focus on getting my training up.“
(As Narumi hops onto the second phone box, she finds a yokai slapping its butt in jest towards her. Narumi playfully responds by swinging her firm ass at it’s denier to knock it off the box.)
“After absorbing that DVD, I returned the following season in shape to be the Grade One Yokai with legends and perfect round-robin tournament runs at my feet. While guys just haven't put in enough reps to have the disciplined body I’ve crafted. They’ve shown that if you give them a hard kick to the soft tush and quick jabs to the glass jaw, as I will, they’ll go down hard to actual competition. Vin smacked Zero, Lad ousted Rick, and my Shinijoshi sisters Amber and Sally bested Justin and Divewire, respectively. As LOTR my class and karate will be overwhelming to them!“
(After reaching the third booth, Narumi pretends to fall as she lays down with her entire upper over the edge.)
“And then you’ve got TV Champ Lad, briefcase Bruce, and the debut upsetter over Ito named Apollo, the super rookies of today. I understand them much more than they do me. I too was once the star rookie who debuted beating a former world champion, quickly won a Broadcast TV title, and had the Primetime Briefcase at my disposal. I'm even the only person who has victoriously main-evented both Youngblood opportunities. But what gives me the edge isn't just that I was arguably the greatest youngblood ever; it’s also that I've been around long enough to learn how to react to the fact that everyone eventually faces severe roadblocks.”
(The visibility of Narumi’s powerful core abs reveals itself as she does a sit-up and then jumps back onto her feet.)
“I’ve overcome adversity by losing championships and fighting the terrors of Melody Malone, which made me wonder if I could ever become an Undisputed Champion, yet still got back up to thrive! If they find themselves with hard times, knocked out of that elevator, do these relatively adversity free wrestlers have the rebound speed, let alone grit, to quickly get back up from the pain before that elevator closes? I know I do.”
(Narumi then walks to the Shinijoshi staple fourth booth as two yokai from the ground reach up to offer her weapons, her signature pink shinai and Yorujubo the kanabo. Narumi takes off her entrance robe and finally accepts to use the kanabo as her smile grows wickedly as she no longer contains her demonic urges.)
“In Japan there’s a warning ‘giving a kanabo to an oni’ is overpowering and a belief shi is a cursing symbol you don't put in elevators. At Stranglemania, the EWC witnesses me abuse both to become the strongest yokai I can be. And Caleb’s the type of warrior susceptible to curses that demonic beings like me love haunting. Rhodes defeating a talented man like him in many championship matches alerted we yokai of his vulnerability. But now he isn’t just contending with Rhodes; he’s also dealing with the fact that he’s already lost multiple Hellevator matches, last time to another Shinijoshi member.”
(Narumi hugs Yorujubo toward her ear, almost as if they’re communicating, as her wild pace increases as she jumps to the fifth and then sixth phone boxes.)
“I will continue off Saidie’s Hellevator work to get Caleb under my thumb. Since Caleb’s number two in hardcore contendership, when I poison him, just as I did Jack, I'll climb the rankings and tack on more curses on him than the ones that hinder him already.“
(The cackling Onihime hops over the seventh box and lands on the eighth to point her bat to the sky.)
“Even the more tenured sacred veterans aren’t safe from me! They, in particular, excite me! Bashing Dalilah has been a favourite hobby of mine, ever since I was the rookie she said couldn't make it here! I want to channel the asskicking style Shinijoshi elder Cloud gave Phoenix! And Rhodes is a tough customer I want to showcase my mettle against to prove I can outfight one of the toughest to ever compete in this sport.“
(One of the figures below throws a baseball up towards Narumi and as her eyes become aggressively elated she swats it far into the distance with her kanabo.)
“Despite the fact they’ve each had their chances at the plate longer than I have, I’ve knocked it out of the park successfully more times than all of them combined. Dalilah failed to replicate my success at cashing in the briefcase, and Phoenix, who never even won it, has an empty nickname he hasn’t earned after repeatedly losing on Prime. Rhodes’ banged-up body can’t keep up with my speed and brutality, I will be too much even for a former multi-time champion who is a possible legendary future hall of famer. Especially since wrestling experience isn’t the be-all-end-all for this type of match.“
(Narumi blitzes over the ninth and tenth boxes, and stops at the eleventh booth to hit a thrown balloon containing blood that explodes everywhere on her as she laughs.)
“There being no ring in this match makes it my element. There’s a reason we Senshi finally beat the Southern Express when they made it a street fight and why I’ve won multiple championships in weapon-based matches! I began learning karate, then cross-trained in BJJ and weaponry, and only afterwards did I get into wrestling. To most people in this match, weapons are called foreign objects that are shameful for true wrestlers like them to use. But I'm at home, where I was taught mastery over all tools, be it your body or weapons, makes you a more complete martial artist. I will go Buck wild as I savagely punch, kick, and use every weapon brought into this match to shatter the bodies and spirits of everyone trapped into that elevator with me, until I reach the top.”
(Narumi reaches the top-standing telephone box and raises her kanabo high.)
“And lord have mercy on anyone who’d reach the roof with me. To win, I’d scramble brains with my Yorujubo! At the mania dedicated to Iggy’s memory I became LOTR. And in this hellscape match with her cup as the reward, I will continue that domino momentum and my Mania streak to knock down the door towards becoming a yokai like no other.”
(Narumi slams the bat down to dent the box and cause the door to open, revealing new ring gear matching joshi deathmatches wear as the camera goes black.)
